


How to run an Opera

by Radartanten



Category: Le Fantôme de l'Opéra | Phantom of the Opera & Related Fandoms, Le Fantôme de l'Opéra | Phantom of the Opera - Gaston Leroux, Phantom - Susan Kay, Phantom of the Opera (2004), Phantom of the Opera - Lloyd Webber
Genre: Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Humor, Love for Music, M/M, Not that dark Erik, Partnership, Phluff, Witty Raoul
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-04
Updated: 2018-04-05
Packaged: 2018-07-12 06:49:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 49
Words: 69,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7090255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Radartanten/pseuds/Radartanten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Raoul is the new patron at the Opera Populaire. He is dead set on getting the Opera back on it's feet. He accidentally falls through a trapdoor in the stage set for La Carlotta and meets the Phantom. Both Raoul and the Phantom want to make the Opera grand once again, and that's a start of an odd partnership.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The unfortunate trapdoor

**Author's Note:**

> In this story Erik is around 28 years. Raoul is older than Christine. He is 21 years, give or take. And Christine is 16. 
> 
> This will be a romance between Raoul and Erik. Christine will be mentioned but she’s not the main character.

_Was I completely out of my mind?_

As I was walking up the stairs to the Opera Populaire in my finest suit and with a regal posture I couldn’t help but notice that the place looked kind of run down. Not the building in itself. No. More the people going in and out of the Opera. 

Monsieur Reyer met me at the top of the stairs with a polite greeting. His hair was on end and his suit had seen better days.

“Vicomte de Chagny! A pleasure, truly a pleasure to have you as a patron to this lovely establishment.” He ran his hand trough his hair nervously and then continued. “Let me show you around. They are in the middle of rehearsing the Opera _Faust_. Are you familiar with it?”

I was as a matter of fact familiar with Faust. It was when I'd listened to _Faust_ that I truly fell in love with music. That was many years ago but I still remember the goosebumps and the truly lightheaded feeling the show left me with. 

Monsieur Reyer showed me inside and talked about the architectural era in which the Opera Populaire was built. I nodded politely but I truly wasn’t listening. The lead soprano had just missed a the high B in the opening number. It was flat. I cringed but tried not to let it show. 

If she was the reason why people stopped going to the Opera, than I had to find a way to get rid of her. Of course, this was a rehearsal. But she was ruining _Faust_. My favourite. 

I excused myself from Monsieur Reyer and started making my way towards the musical disaster happening on the stage. 

“Why did you stop playing Maestro? I was just about to do the crescendo! How rude! Now I’ve lost my flow!”

The high pitched shrieking voice was even more annoying up close. But if I was to make this company profitable again I’d have to learn how to deal with people in all varieties. The diva noticed me and I put on my most charming smile showing off all the pearly whites. 

“Bon soir Madame. I’m Raoul de Chagny, the new patron of this Opera.” I kissed her hand out of politeness. She smiled a true gold digger smile and giggled.

“Oohh, pleased to meet you monsieur le Vicomte! I am La Carlotta! The Diva of Paris. I’m the one the audience loves. I always keep them coming back for more.”

_Rather keeping them out…_

“I hear you’re practicing _Faust_ Madame…” I didn’t get further than that before a loud slam was heard from backstage. There was screaming and some of the ballet girls cried out “The Ghost! The Ghost! Is it the Phantom?” 

I had of course heard the rumours of the infamous Phantom of this Opera, but I simply assumed that it was a trick from the management to make the Opera seem more magical and therefore more exciting. My curiosity wanted to know what on earth was going on though, but since I was at the very front of the stage with the Diva I soon realised that making my way past hoards of ballet girls wasn’t an option. 

The floor was suddenly pulled out from under me and the last thing I remember was La Carlotta in her big poofy dress falling just ahead of me. 

 

* * *

_White. A skull. No. A mask!_

When I got around to focusing my thoughts again I was lying in some kind of cold, dark, cave-like tunnel. The only light present came from the two candelabras placed on each side of the tunnel. And it was in this light that I finally made out the shape of a mask. The mask was worn by a man in a black suit. He was approximately 6’1 and his short black hair was as impeccable as his clothing. His posture radiated confidence and his yellow eyes seemed to look straight into my very soul. 

“Well, this was unfortunate.” the man in black stated in a low baritone voice. 

I tried to sit up and then noticed that my hands were tied and my head ached. I managed somehow to get into sitting position before my eyes met his again.

“What happened? Where am I?”

“I needed to get La Carlotta out of the way and you happened to get in the way. But since you _dropped in_ we might as well have a chat. And by chat _I_ mean that I ask questions and _you_ answer them.”

“But, who are you?”

“Insolent boy! Don’t you know who I am?! _I_ am the Opera Ghost, the Phantom of this establishment, and therefore you should do my bidding or be prepared to face the consequences!“

Well, aside from the fact that I was now faced with a man who believed himself to be a spectre, I was rather pleased that he answered my question even though he’d just said he wouldn’t. I couldn’t help but smirk at that thought. The Phantom looked at me sternly and continued: 

“I hear you are now one of the Operas Patrons. As a patron you actually have a say in how the Opera is run. This power is very limited of course, and you need to know that I am the ruler of this place. And you will therefore follow my will if you value your life. Your first assignment is to make sure that Carlotta leaves this place before the week is over.”

I raised my eyebrows and nodded at him. “Yes. Something must have gone horribly wrong when they hired her. She was flat on the end note of her aria. Did you hear that? Absolutely horrible!”

Now it was his turn to raise his eyebrows and a small smile tugged at the one corner of his mouth that wasn’t hidden behind his mask. 

“Indeed she was. And this was sadly not the first time. I believe she’s still here because Monsieur Reyer is sentimental and he hasn’t found a replacement yet.”

“And you have?” I couldn’t help but sound hopeful at his words.

“Yes. I’ve been giving one of the chorus girls private lessons. She does not have much experience on the stage yet, but her voice is up to par. She’ll be ready to take the stage any day now.”

“Oh thank God. I’m not sure I would have been able to sit through another dissection of _Faust_.”

“Agreed. I wasn’t entirely sure if Christine was ready to take the role as a Diva, but after that horrendous rehearsal I simply decided that she was.”

“Christine?”

“The chorus girl. Christine Daae. The daughter of the late Gustaf Daae, the famous violinist. She will be our next big soprano.”

“Christine Daae? I've heard of her father. I didn’t know he passed away though. That’s too bad. He was a great musician.”

“What’s your name boy?” The Phantom took a few steps forward and crouched down to my height.

“Raoul de Chagny.” I refrained from asking how he knew I was the new patron but still didn’t know my name. Up close I got a good view of his wide shoulders and sinewy but strong body. I’ve always felt more appreciation for the male anatomy than the female curves though that was a well kept secret between me, myself and I. 

He loosened the ties around my wrists and looked at me with those soul searching eyes. 

“You seem to have a good ear for music monsieur de Chagny. Get rid of La Carlotta, and follow my orders and you will soon have a brilliant establishment. Don’t and you’ll be sorry. Have I made myself clear?”

“Perfectly, monsieur…” I held out my hand to him while I waited for him to give me his name. His real name. I’ve never believed in ghosts and I wasn’t about to start now. 

His hand was cold as he grasped mine, but it was still very much a human hand. His answer was unsatisfactory though:

“Good. I’ll show you the way out of here and you’ll get to work. There’s no time like the present. But keep in mind young man that I’m keeping my eyes on you.”

_The butterflies in my stomach told me that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing._


	2. Cramped walls and requiems

_Why couldn’t I stop thinking about him?_

La Carlotta wasn’t in the next day. She had gone rampage and screamed at the managers once the Phantom had let her go. He had apparently threatened her, and now she refused to continue rehearsing the Opera unless she got to have a body guard on stage and a higher salary. I heard all this from monsieur Reyer who looked even more worn out this morning than when I first met him yesterday. I took it upon myself to _convince La Carlotta to stay_ and monsieur Reyer seemed very grateful for my offer. I would of course do no such ting. I would do everything in my power to keep her _out_ of this business. And especially out of _Faust_.

To get La Carlotta to quit didn’t seem so hard though since the Phantom seemed to have done the necessary preparations of making her extremely uncomfortable. _I_ on the other hand was not uncomfortable in his presence. I was intrigued. 

The short meeting yesterday left me with more questions than answers. Who was he? Where does he live? Why does he care about the Opera? What’s behind the mask?

On our short way back through the tunnels I promised never to mention our meeting to anyone, and he answered me with _“You better not”_. There was something about the way he growled that sentence that made my heart beat faster and a small smile tugged at the corners of my mouth. A court nod at the large stone statue that marked the entrance to the world above and he was gone. Gone from my sight, but not from my mind.

* * *

I continued to talk to monsieur Reyer about the plan for the upcoming season. 

“Monsieur Reyer. As much as I love _Faust_ , I’ve noticed that you have played that particular Opera not twice, but three times the last year. How come?”

“Well monsieur le Vicomte, as you are well aware the Opera has had a rather rough year and a new Opera costs a small fortune. If we buy old scores the audience have already heard it in Rome, but we can’t buy new scores since the audience is steadily decreasing in numbers. It is a vicious circle really.”

“I see. Well as your patron I’m sure I can help out with that particular problem. I know of a composer in Lille that might be able to give us a reasonable price. I’ll get back to you!”

Monsieur Reyer visibly exhaled. He seemed to have carried the Operas problems on his shoulders alone for far too long. Or at least he thought he was alone. My thoughts went back to the Phantom. This tall and dangerous man who seemed determined to save this establishment no matter what. Even if it meant he threatened the crew. I sighed. Threatening the crew is never a good thing whether he followed through with his threats or not. And something told me that I’d have to deal with that later on. 

As I was walking through an empty corridor towards the storage room where the scores were kept, an arm came out of nowhere, grasped my elbow, and pulled me in behind a marble pillar. I managed to register a white mask before I was shoved into a cramped hidden passage in the wall. 

“Ow! Do you always move around in these tight passages? Why don’t you abduct me to a nice place next time? A conference room perhaps?”

“Good day to you too, Monsieur le Victomte. Stop your whining and follow me.”

He set off at an impressive pace, considering that the passage allowed very little movement at all. Huffing and puffing I tried my best to follow the graceful feline of a man who seemed to run like water around the various obstacles in his path.

“Would you mind telling me _why_ we’re in here?”

“Well we can’t very well talk out in the open now can we. And keep your voice down, _one_ Phantom is quite enough for this place.”

I managed to squeeze around a corner and then climbed down shaft that seemed to go on forever. Down once more in the damp and dark cavelike areas under the Opera he started talking: 

“You were on your way to the score room correct?”

“Yes”

“To look for some kind of amazing piece of music that you hope had simply been forgotten, correct?  
At this point I felt kind of busted.

“…yes.”

“Well, you’re not going to find it.”

I let out a deep sigh. I did know a composer in Lille, but he was very old and to hope that he could write an entire Opera was a bit too hopeful. And if they didn’t have any kind of useful scores in the reserve, then this was going to be a whole lot harder that I thought. 

“Well, then what?” I muttered mostly to myself. 

The masked man took a step closer and tilted his head an inch to the left. He looked regal in his neat suit and tall posture. The candle light illuminated his face in a mysterious and alluring way. 

“You seem to truly care about this place, boy. Last thing I heard the de Chagnys were bankers, and not that well versed in cultural contexts. How come you’re the exception?”

His yellow eyes pierced mine once again and I could have sworn my heart skipped a beat. I took a deep breath while I wondered how much I could tell this man. He didn’t seem like the tattletale type. Really, who would he tell? But could I trust him? The man hadn’t even given me his name. Although that was probably proof enough that he was good at keeping secrets. I decided on an honest but careful approach to the subject. 

“Yes. My family has always preferred flourishing businesses over anything cultural really. And I’ve always stood out like a sore thumb. So I wasn’t very upset when my father told me that my brother Philippe would take over the family business while I was to do something on my own.” 

That wasn’t the whole story and the Phantom seemed to sense it. His yellow eyes scrutinized me verily, but he seemed to be satisfied with the answer for now. In fact, his voice seemed to soften.

“I’ve started working on a requiem that will be quite grand, if I may say so myself. You needn’t worry about the future after _Faust_. “

Ah. So this “Phantom” was actually some kind of eccentric composer that lived for music! He probably worked in the Opera many years ago and had gotten banned when he yelled at some poor trombonist who didn’t play with enough legato. Then the eccentric man must have hidden inside the Opera and taken the role as the Phantom so he could blackmail the managers into giving him money for food while he controlled the Opera and wrote his music! Yes, that must be it!

Even though I was very proud to have figured out a potential background to the “ghost”, I wasn’t entirely sure I wanted to bet the future after _Faust_ on the scores that a lunatic had come up with. A lot was at stake here. 

“A requiem you say? Isn’t that a little grave? Will you play it for me? I so want to hear a part of this marvellous piece your describing.”

After a long pause in which the Phantom seemed to evaluate everything from my physical state to my very heart, before he finally nodded. 

“Alright monsieur. If I give you this chance, will you prove that you deserve it?”

This felt like a point of no return. Either I was in it all the way, with heart and soul, trying my hardest to get this Opera back on it’s feet, or I was out. To partner up with the man who supposedly haunted this residence seemed odd, but then again I could use someone with insight in every nook of this place, so why not?

“Yes! You have my word monsieur…” Once again I held out my hand and hoped trusted me enough this time to give me his name. He smirked at me and shook my hand.

“Good. Follow me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahaha! Poor Raoul. When will Eric trust him with his name? ;)
> 
> Please leave comments! I love em, I love em, I love em! 
> 
> And thank you for reading! :D


	3. Rogue composers and wordplays

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for leaving kudos! It warms my heart and makes me want to keep up the writing. :3

So we ventured down to _the dungeons of his black despair_ as he so eloquently put it. I snorted, but then I wasn’t so sure if he was kidding or not. The tunnels divided and they were rarely high enough to walk straight in. The place was like a labyrinth. I was glad I had a guide. 

Finally, we reached our destination. His humble abode was close to a grand underground lake. In fact, it felt like stepping out of the wobbly boat right into his living room. Lots of wax candles illuminated the couch, the coffee table, and the organ. There were many instruments scattered across the room. From my viewpoint I could see a violin, a piano, a cello and a panpipe. How he got the organ and the piano down there was beyond me. He could not have taken the same route we arrived in, that was clear. I didn’t dare to ask him though. That would have to be a question for later on. _Another_ question for later on. 

“As I mentioned earlier, the whole requiem isn’t finished yet, but I will play you the prelude. Please, have a seat.”

He motioned towards the sofa while he took a seat behind the piano, and soon a tentative a-minor crept into the room. A hopeful but tragic melody was coaxing my eyelids to close, and I relaxed back into the sofa to fully absorb the music. There was anger in the chords. There was fear. The fluttering of a heartbeat and the kind of pain that radiates from the heart to the fingertips. Finally the piece came to a close with the lonely a-minor fading into nothingness. 

I opened my eyes and met the phantoms yellow ones. I pulled back my shirt sleeve to let him see the goose bumps on my arm. 

“That was unlike anything I’ve ever heard. That was amazing. Truly extraordinary! I felt like I was there, being chased, being hurt, being lonely. I’ve never experienced feelings displayed in such a raw and exposed way.”  
“Thank you. You have… something on your cheek.” 

I brushed my fingers over my cheek and realised he was right. They were wet. I hadn’t realised I’d been crying.

“Thank you for your kind words of praise. I take it you approve of the requiem being the next grand production after _Faust_.”

“No. As a matter of fact I don’t.”

Surprise washed over his features but before he could ask my _why_ I continued. 

“The piece you played seemed almost personal. I’m sure you would have done a marvellous job conducting the orchestras different parts in this, but isn’t this a piece made fore a lone piano? Isn’t this a piece made for introspection? It is a breath-taking song indeed but the general audience does not venture to the Opera for introspection but for fire and passion.”

“You mean they need to forget their simple, pathetic lives for a moment and not be reminded of mans true nature. As much as it ails me to say… you do make a valid point.”

Well… I would personally not call the life of the everyday man pathetic but I figured it was best if I kept my mouth shut. Therefore I simply nodded.

“I don’t suppose you have an Opera about a passionate love story laying around?”

“No. None that I’ve written myself. But I guess writing one shouldn’t be too hard. In the meantime I suppose we could do _Dido and Aneas_. It’s an Opera written in 1689 by Henry Purcell. There should be enough love and heartbreak in that to keep the audience satisfied until I’ve written something of my own.”

We continued to talk for over an hour, and even though our conversation consisted mostly of me asking questions and him answering them, it felt close to normal. As normal as it gets when your counterpart is a rogue composer living in damp caves. I tentatively tried breaching different topics. I soon found out that he did not like to talk about himself (other than his creations), but music and gossip were two subjects that really got his mind into gear. He seemed to know everything about the crew working at the Opera; who flirted with whom, who took offence, who made a fool out of himself at practice and so on and so fourth. I just needed to say the appropriate “Mmmm.”, “Really?” and “You don’t say!” to keep him going. How he saw and heard all that through the walls was yet another thing that was beyond me. He was in a surprisingly good mood when he followed me back through the labyrinth of tunnels to the world above. 

“I do believe you know the way from here.” The Phantom said as we stepped into an empty foyer. 

“Ehh… yes.” I looked around trying to figure out exactly where I was. The twists and turns under the Opera had made my sense of direction skewed. 

“Pick up the score for _Dido and Aneas_ and bring it to Monsieur Reyer. Make sure that no scores are missing. The cellist have a horrible tendency to misplace note sheets. And do make sure that we get rid of La Carlotta. Until we meet again Monsieur le Vicomte! Call for help if you find yourself in need of it. Goodbye.”

He was on his was back into the underground when I took him up on his offer. 

“Help! Please.” He turned around and questioned me with a raised eyebrow. 

“Hrm… Where do I go?”

“The score room is to your left.”

“Thank you. Goodbye.” I started off but didn’t go further than a few steps before a heard him snickering.

“Your _other_ left, Monsieur le Vicomte.”

“Ah, right!” I did a one-eighty and tried to hold my head up, despite my mishap.

“No, Monsieur. Not right, but _left_.”

That joke was the very definition of lame but he seemed so genuinely happy, I could not help but smile and snicker along with him. Well If he liked wordplays…

“Thanks for telling me before you _left_.”

He was chuckling by now and his mask seemed to turn in an odd angle. Like it wasn’t made for smiling faces. Did he ever smile like this with his mask on?

“Don’t mention it. It’s all _right_.”

Now it was my turn to chuckle and answer him with;

“The only exception being the direction to the score room.”

“Of course.” He smiled. The crinkles around his visible eye was showing and his yellow eyes seemed so alive.

“Hopefully those directions will keep me _on_ course. And I’ll see you around?” I couldn’t help but sound hopeful. Mad composer or not, I was having a great time in his company. He seemed to be one of the few truly intellectual individuals in this place. His analyses of compositions and the orchestra was extraordinary, and made me realise I had much to learn. 

“I guess. Most people in this establishment would find _seeing me around_ to be a part of their worst nightmares.”

“Well I’m not like most people.”

“Yes, so it would seem. Farewell, Monsieur.”

I nodded in farewell and turned toward the score room. He had said _most people_. He did not say _all_. Did that mean that there were other people in the opera that he kidnapped regularly. And why did that thought make me jealous? Ah, he must have meant that chorus girl Christine. But from what he told me in his _dungeons of black despair_ Christine hadn’t actually seen him. He had some kind of voice lessons with her through a mirror in the chapel where he had convinced her that he was an angel. But then who was he talking about? And what was his name?

I spun around with the hopes of catching him once again.

“Wait Monsieur! What’s your na…” He was already gone. The wall looked as solid as any other with no trace of the man who had recently disappeared through it into the darkness once again. The man who _still_ remained nameless…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always; If you find typos / have opinions please let me know.
> 
> Love and luck to all readers!


	4. Spawns of malice and nicknames

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the kudos and the comments! :D They make my day! ^^

“And it was _horrible_. He must have been the devil himself and…”

“Yes yes Madame. I’m sure I understand it must have been terrifying. I wont ask you to go there again if only in memory. And let me tell you we’re sad to see you go but we fully understand your reasons.” I smiled and nodded at the Diva who had ranted on and on about her short meeting with the phantom for half an hour now. I glanced at the clock on the desk in Monsieur Reyers office. 

_Scratch that. Forty minutes and counting…_

“I know you must be heartbroken and therefore I’ve decided that if I get to have a body guard with me at all times and also a slightly bigger check each month I might be able to conquer my fears and take the stage once again.”

“Well as a matter of fact, our economy is rather strained at the moment and we can’t afford neither a body guard nor a raise. Therefore I wish you the best of luck and thank you once again for your many years serving at this Opera.” I stood up and opened the door. My patience was wearing thin. 

And finally it dawned on her that she was being fired. 

“But Monsieur le Vicomte! I’m sure we can come to some kind of agreement. We can skip the raise if I can only get my guard. I just want to feel safe. And if you can’t afford a professional then I sure wouldn’t mind having such a handsome man such as yourself nipping at my heels.” She placed her hand on my chest and giggled in what was supposed to be a flirtatious way. Me having never felt attraction to any female really (especially not one with such a large ego) was just about to firmly shove her out the door when she did something unexpected. 

She grabbed my head and buried it in the cleft of her bosom. And well… her ego wasn’t the only thing big on her. 

“I figured you wanted a closer look at the body you’ll be guarding.”

I had reached the end of my patience. _That’s it! She’s asking for it._

“The only one who should be _guarding_ anything is you Madame. Start with your tongue and your actions. Your breasts don’t make that B less flat no matter how round they are. So would you please get them away from me? The main entrance doors are in that direction. Use them!”

I pushed her away, pointed and let my facial expression turn into an angry scowl.

With an indignant _hrumpf_ she was off. She kept her head held high though her pride was obviously hurt. 

_Well it was about time someone burst her bubble._

I closed the door and let out a deep sigh. 

*clap clap clap* “’They don’t make that B less flat’, you have a way with words Monsieur le Vicomte, I’ll give you that. If all your conversations are like this one than I’ll have to start stalking you more often.” A smirk accompanied yellow eyes that glittered in the light from the desktop.

Aside from the initial shock of finding him a few steps behind me I was glad to share his company again. 

“I wouldn’t mind if it resulted in spontaneous and intellectual conversations more often. By the way, how did you get in here?”

“A magician never reveals his secrets.”

“So you’re a magician now too eh? Is there anything your not?”

“Omnipotent, soprano, good looking, take your pick.” He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back against the wall. His smirk was one-sided. Or at least I thought it was. Damn that mask. He seemed to be in a good mood so I took my chances. I gave him a once over before I met his eyes again.

“On the contrary.” He seemed to be older than me though not by much. The suit he wore showed off a little muscle here and there on his slim figure. Enough to trigger my fantasies. 

He snorted. “You’re a peculiar man Monsieur le Vicomte. Here you seem highly annoyed when your face gets pressed to the bosom of the primadonna herself. But complimenting the monster of this place has you blushing. You’re either out of your mind or one of a kind.”  
“What can I say? I’m a fan of the man, so to speak.” I held my breath after that last confession. Would he shy away? Would he use it against me by somehow telling the managers and have me kicked out? Would he be disgusted and get angry with me? 

This wasn’t something I’d shared with anyone before. Not even my brother Philippe knew and he was my very best friend. I had heard rumours though of others who had dared to breach the step out of the closet. The outcome had been nothing short of a disaster. 

“Really? Is that why you don’t get to inherit the Chagny family business?” 

Well he didn’t seem grossed out. Only curious. 

“Mmm. They don’t know of my predicament, only that I havn’t shown interest in any of the girls who has _conveniently dropped by_ the chateaux this last few years. Besides, Philippe is courting Mademoiselle Celine and it’s only a matter of time before they get married. Philippe is also far more into banking than I am so it makes sense for him to take over the business.”

“I’m glad he does. That means you’ve got more time for the Opera.”

I was relieved to see that he wasn’t angry or disgusted. He seemed indifferent which could be due to years of hiding his feelings or perhaps he truly didn’t care. I smiled and nodded.

“I’m here wholeheartedly.”

“Good. I could use a helper.”

“Hey! If anything you’re _my_ helper.” I guess my laughter didn’t really help me prove my point though.

“I was here first. So _I’m_ giving orders.” His eyes shone with the same merriment I’d seen earlier on.

“Well we can’t very well have a main manager who spies on the crew through walls and trapdoors.” 

His rebuttal was quick. The smirk never leaving his features. 

“At least it’s better than a manager who cannot differentiate left from right.”

“Ouch. Touché!” I was laughing by now. “You’re never going to let me live that down are you? Fine. What will you have me do then main manager?” I gave him a mock bow. 

“I will have you _notice_ Christine. Now that La Carlotta is out of the way it is of utmost importance that Christine takes her place quickly before the chorus girls start tearing each other to shreds over the title Diva.”

“Are you serious? Would they do that? They all seem so petit and cute and… harmless.”

“On stage yes. Off stage…” The Phantom shuddered. “If I were to give you one advice Monsieur le Vicomte…” I cut him off. I already felt closer to him than to most of my other acquaintances and _Monsieur le Vicomte_ seemed far to formal for our childish bickering.

“Raoul. Call me Raoul.” 

“Right. If I were to give you one advice _Raoul_ , it is to never ever underestimate the chorus girls. In group they are no short of spawns of malice.”

I was close to laughing again, but then I saw his dead serious expression and restrained myself. Instead I frowned and tilted my head to the side.

“What did they do? What happened?”

“They’ve bullied Christine and her friend Meg for years.” He let out a deep sigh. “Training her to become the Diva was therefore not only for the sake of the Opera but for her sake as well. At least she’ll be able to sleep a whole night through when she has her own room.”

I was about to ask for details but he met my gaze and shook his head no. That was probably a story for another time then. I couldn’t help but wonder though. 

“How come the infamous Phantom hasn’t frightened them into submission yet then?”

“Christine only knows me as the _angel of music_ , and I’m afraid that using the Phantom to scare the other chorus girls would lead to more picking on Christine. It wouldn’t be good for either of us if it seemed as if the Phantom had a soft spot for a certain person in particular instead of the Opera as a whole. I can’t be there to watch over her all the time.” A smirk grazed his features. “I promised to keep my eyes on you remember?”

I blushed. Again. He chuckled. 

“There’s no need to get all flustered Raoul. Let’s go and see if we can find Christine. I’ll go with you so you won’t get lost.” He walked past me towards the door.

The way his voice caressed my name almost made up for the rest of the words coming out of his mouth. And it annoyed me to no end that I still didn’t know what to call him. It was about time I showed him that I could be just as annoying as he was. Two could play that game. 

“Lead the way than Bertram.”

He stopped dead in his tracks. “Bertram?”

“Well since you haven’t given me your name yet I decided I must call you something.”

“And out of all the names there is you decided upon _Bertram_?”  
Now it was my time to smirk. A winning smirk. A I-will-keep-calling-you-Bertram-until-you-give-me-your-name-smirk. He gave me a long look.

“Erik.”

“Pleased to meet you Erik!” By this, I was showing off all my pearly whites. The _hrumpf_ he let out almost covered his chuckle.


	5. Big brothers and exits

Over the next few weeks I got to know Erik even better. He told me about how the first time he met Christine he found her crying in the chapel over the loss of her father. He had felt sorry for her and had taken the role as her big brother. I simply couldn’t help but comment on that though.

“Really? My older brother didn’t hide inside walls and pretend to be an otherworldly being, but hey, every family’s different right?”

“Then again, your brother didn’t have the face of gargoyle either. Your comparison isn’t fair.” He stated this calmly while picking up his glass of wine from the coffee table taking a small sip before lounging back into the sofa. 

“If the other half of your face is any indication, then it really cannot be that bad.”

“It isn’t and it is.”

“You mean you can’t make up your mind.”

“No I mean the two sides of my face are not even closely related, and _yes it is that bad_.” He was speaking of his disfigured face in a calm and collected way, but there was something about the way his eyes didn’t meet mine that spoke of his true feelings on the matter. It was about time to lighten the mood.

“I _dare_ you to take the mask off.”

Finally his eyes met mine. He raised his eyebrows in disbelief before he answered me.

“If you truly believe I’ll take off my mask for the sake of a dare then you’ve got bigger problems than your lacking sense of location.”

And we’re back to the bickering!

“See! My point exactly. A true older brother would have taken up the dare or chased me six ways from Sunday.”

“Please. Don’t give yourself credit. You wouldn’t even get past the organ if I were to chase you.”

_Is that a challenge?_

“Who’s full of himself now? I would be out of here before you’ve even risen from the sofa old man! Besides, I’m closer to the organ anyhow. There’s no way you could catch up to me.”

“Just because I’m a few years older than you doesn’t mean I’m crippled. I’ll even give you a head start.”

It seemed like I had to take our dear phantom down a notch. I remember thinking _This is too easy_. But I didn’t stop to analyse the situation and ask myself _why_. In retrospect, I probably should have. As it was I looked into those glowing eyes for a moment before I sprinted towards the organ. Adrenalin pumped in my veins and I pushed myself to run faster. I would be out of his home before he even put that wineglass back on the coffee table.

 _Yes! I reached the organ! … … and now what?_ I scanned the wall on each side of the organ frantically for a doorway. Or a trapdoor, or a hole or a crack in the wall. Nothing.

I felt a hand on top of my shoulder and heard his low rumbling laughter. 

“It’s a dead end Raoul. There is no exit in this direction.”

Well yes. My pride was a little hurt but the sound of his laughter made up for it tenfold. I turned around to face him and noticed yet again that his mask wasn’t made for a laughing face. I caught short glimpses of red skin around the edges of the mask as it struggled to keep his face hidden through his guffaw. _Had he been burnt by a fire?_ I wasn’t about to ruin the mood by asking though.

“Now _that_ was a very big brothery thing you just did. Consider yourself now a part of the worlds greatest pains in the ass.”

He was laughing so much tears started forming in his beautiful eyes. He didn’t notice it until the first one slid down his bare cheek though. 

“Look who’s crying now Monsieur I’m-actually-a-few-years-older-than-you.”

Still laughing, still crying, and still with his hand on my shoulder he answered me. 

“It’s worth it! All the tears I shed are all worth the look of complete befuddlement on your face when you…” Yet another fit of laughter overtook him and made him cut the sentence short. His laughter was rich and bubbly, like champagne, and suddenly I found myself thirsty.

When he took a deep breath a squeaking noise was heard from behind his mask. He winced and his hands flew up to cover his nose. The noise combined with his priceless facial expression was the last straw for me. I broke down laughing too. And before too long it was my turn to place a hand on _his_ shoulder for the simple purpose of keeping me upright. With no ulterior motive. Whatsoever. 

“You were quite quick though. I’ll give you that. If you hadn’t run in the wrong direction you would have probably made it past the lake before I caught you.” 

“Still think you’re capable of catching me eh? So that means you’re up for a rematch?” I squeezed his shoulder and gave him a playful grin. 

His smirk turned into a gentle smile and he shook his head in the negative.

“No. I’ve built traps in these caves. One wrong turn and you could be hurt. Or worse. I can’t let that happen.” I wanted to ask more about this traps but found myself lost in his deep yellow eyes. I felt like I could study them for ages and never get enough. He leaned in closer to me and I felt the quickening of my heartbeat. He took a breath and I braced myself for whatever was coming. 

“Nor do I trust your sense of orientation enough.”

I snorted and shoved him away. I did it in a playful manner, but the fact was I needed a little space to supress the butterflies in my stomach. I started off toward the sofa in need of another fill of wine. I filled my glass and tried to clear my head. 

_How ironic. Wine for clearing my head. Who would have thought…_

“I could teach you… if you like.” His offer was tentative and I could feel the weight of his eyes on me. 

“Are you going to draw me a map? That would look great in a chase: ‘Wait there Monsieur Phantom I’m just going to figure out if I am to take the third or the fourth turn to the right.’” I was trying to lighten the mood but it came out with a slightly bitter tinge. I hoped he hadn’t noticed. Before I knew it my eyes met his again. It felt like he could see right through me. I was therefore not surprised when his answer was honest and straight forward.

“No. Not unless you want me to. I’ve cleared and build these paths over the past two decades. I know them like the back of my hand. I have no doubt that you can learn to find your way given time, but I don’t want you to wander down here alone. It’s far too dangerous and I would never forgive myself should anything happen to you.”

I nodded and embraced it for the compliment it was. My heart rejoiced at the thought of Erik caring for me, but my mind was stuck on another part of his short speech. He had built this over the past _two decades_. He must have been a kid when he started! Could he really be the composer gone rouge that I believed him to be? 

“Two decades?”

I didn’t need to say more. The question was implied. The masked man let out a deep sigh.

“ _That_ is a story for a another time. A time when we have obtained more wine than one bottle.” A small smile exchanged between friends. 

“That can be arranged. I happen to have the keys to the Chagny wine cellar.” The smiles turned to chuckles. 

“Tempting, though I’m not sure there are enough wine in Paris for that story.”

“We’ll see about that. I usually prefer to be sober for such conversations but you’re not about to talk about it without soothing liquor are you?” 

“Not likely.”

“Not even if I _dare_ you to?”

This time, I didn’t run in the direction of the organ.


	6. Roses and supplies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I reread the first and second chapter and corrected some typos. If you find any more of 'em please tell me. :) 
> 
> I also changed Raoul and Christines backstory in ch 1. Raoul and Christine aren't childhood friends in this story. 
> 
> (And Erik hasn't been to Persia btw. He has lived under the Opera since Antoinette saved him.)
> 
> Thank you for all the lovely comments and kudos! :D They make my day! My love goes out to all of you!

_People. People everywhere!_

It was just after the successful debut of _Faust_ with Christine in the role as Diva. The audience loved her and I had to admit both she and Erik had done a great job. She seemed a little timid at first but when she opened her mouth… sheer perfection. 

I had made my way backstage to congratulate the crew on a job well done but I wasn’t the only one with that idea. It seemed like all of Paris was squeezing into the few backstage corridors. 

_How I long for a less cramped space! Like the entrance hall, or Monsieur Reyers office, or even the paths in the walls that Erik showed me. There I could actually move both backwards and forwards and that’s saying more than my current movability._

A group of violinists shoved me against the wall as they pressed on further into the mass of moving bodies. The violinists may have been small but they had surprisingly sharp elbows. I rubbed my ribs and pressed myself flat against the wall. 

“Raoul. Meet me in the chapel at once.” The voice came from the wall. I didn’t need to be told twice. 

Now if following the stream in this corridor was hard, then moving counter flow was close to impossible. Yet now I had an incentive. 

* * *

“What part of _at once_ didn’t you get?” He stood with his back turned to me as I finally entered the chapel.  
“What part of _massive loud crowd_ don’t you get? I came here as fast as I could.”

“Why get in there in the first place if you couldn’t get out?”

“Why make me come all the way over here if you’re just going to nag at me?” I wasn’t about to apologize when I did my best to arrive quickly. He did though.

“Forgive me Raoul. Nagging was not my intention. I appreciate you taking the time to come see me.”

“Don’t mention it. Besides, I might have suffocated from lack of oxygen if I stayed in that crowd any longer. Now, why did you need me? Or have you simply found yourself addicted to my presence?”

“As much as your presence lifts my spirits I do hope you’ll do me a favour. Right now. As you are well aware, Christine did an amazing debut tonight. She needs to be congratulated properly. She has worked really hard and I want her to see that all that hard effort pays off. So if you would take this…” He handed me a large bouquet with red roses. “… and tell her that she sang great. Perhaps a bit too piano on the second part of the prelude but otherwise, fantastic.”

“Wait, why can’t you do it yourself? You know her. I don’t. And compliments probably mean far more coming from her teacher than coming from a man she’s met twice.” I tried giving the roses back but Erik wouldn’t take them.

“No, no. Did you forget the fact that I’m an angel in her eyes. I can’t just waltz in there. That’ll frighten the poor girl to death.”

“Can’t you sneak the flowers into her room and write her a note?”

“No. See I have taken the role as her stern teacher. I can’t shower her with gifts and compliments. She’ll start thinking I’ve become soft and then she won’t practice and the next show will be a fiasco and the Opera will be ruined.”

“Don’t you think you’re being a tiny bit overdramatic?”

“Nonsense. Now come with me, I’ve got a secret passage that will get you there in no time.”

“Of course you do…” I muttered under my breath and followed Erik into a nearby wall.  
_Why do I have a bad feeling about this?_

* * *

 

So I reached Christines room and Erik managed to smuggle me into the room without her noticing. Aside from giving her a minor heart attack when I cleared my throat, things went pretty well. I handed her the flowers and showered her with compliments, wishing her many successful performances in the near future. I was on my way out of there when she carefully placed a hand on my forearm and smiled.

“Monsieur, I don’t even know your name.”

“You don’t? Right. Sorry ‘bout that. I’m Raoul de Chagny. You’ve probably heard of me under another name, or rather title, Vicomte de Chagny.” I didn’t mean to sound boasting. I was simply stating facts. She didn’t seem to take offence though. Instead she smiled even wider. Her eyes were glittering. 

“Can I call you Raoul?”

I knew that smile! It was a coy smile. I recognised it from the many fine ladies that tried to win my affections back at the chateau. Therefore I wanted to answer No! I’m monsieur le Vicomte to you young lady. But I couldn’t very well give her roses and compliments and then deny her my first name. My smile was therefore strained as I answered her. 

“Hrm.. yes. I should take my leave.” The quicker I got out of there the better. 

“Take care Christine. I look forward to your hearing your next performance. Until then!”  
I swung open the door but my next step was hindered by lots of flourishing dresses. 

“That’s the wardrobe Raoul.” Christine giggled delightfully. I turned bright red. She couldn’t very well know that I’d come into this room through her full length mirror while she was folding her evening gown. I hadn’t used the only entrance _door_ to the room , and in my haste to get out of there I tried exiting through the walk in closet. I wasn’t blushing because I was making a fool out of myself in front of Christine. Sure, it was unfortunate since she interpreted both my mishap and my red cheeks as the foolishness of a man in love. But the main thought that made me blush and want to hide my face in my hands was that Erik was most likely watching. He would never let me live this down.

“Yes, yes. Hrm… lovely dresses. Good day Christine.” It was with a sigh of relief that I stepped into the crowded corridor yet again. Anything was better than staying in that room. 

 

* * *

When I once again reached the chapel Erik was already there waiting for me. The smirk on his face told me that he’d spent the last quarter of an hour making up new funny ways of mocking me for my mishap.

“Raoul! How…”

“Not. A. Word. I helped you out, you’re supposed to be nice to me.”

Erik's eyes were pleading with me. “But this is the funniest thing that’s happened all week. Can’t I get just one in? And then I’ll let it go? Hmm? One?”

“Fine” I sighed. “Give me your worst then.”

“But they’re all good ones!” He winked at me. “You’re lucky you didn’t open the supply closet next to the mirror. But I’m guessing you had enough of a _supplies_ opening the wardrobe.” 

I tried to keep a straight face. But the lame joke combined with Erik's proud giggling had me chuckling before I knew it. 

“Ha ha. Very funny. Now we’ve got a new problem though. Did you see the way she looked at me? Not good. Definitely not good. How do I let her down easy? How do I tell her that she’s too young and that she lacks certain…”

“…parts?” Erik filled in. I raised my eyebrow and crossed my arms in front of me. 

“I was going to say personality traits Erik. Really, get your mind out of the gutter.” I wasn’t going for personality traits at all but he didn’t need to know that. I wasn’t about to let a situation were I could get back at Erik run through my fingers. I got my reward when he gave me that one sided smile and I heard him mumbling:

“It’s hard when you’re around.”

I couldn’t help myself.

“Metaphorically or literally?” 

“Who’s mind’s in the gutter now eh?”

“Didn’t want you to get lonely down there.”

“I’ll tell Christine that she can’t have suitors while practicing. That it affects her career. That should keep you in the clear. She’s too soft for you anyway. And that’s the opposite of what you need.” He smirked at me before he turned around and moved one of the statues out of the way. 

“Come on, we’ve got an Opera to run.”


	7. Silence is gold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for awesome comments! :D I appreciate them as always, they keep me going! ^^ 
> 
> And since I'm a Swede; GLAD MIDSOMMAR TILL ER ALLA! (Happy midsummer's eve to all of you!)

Christine wasn’t so easily swayed though. The recent success seemed to have gotten to her head. I guess I’m partially guilty for that. Erik had picked up rumours amongst the ballet girls that I was courting Christine. She had apparently described our last meeting in great detail for each and everyone who got within earshot. Everyone was now convinced I was head over heels for our new Diva. Everyone except me that is. 

It did serve some kind of purpose though when my father decided to drop by the Opera and see how things were going. He hadn’t been there for more than an hour before the rumour reached him.

“Sooo, Mademoiselle Daae hmm, Raoul?” He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. 

Stifling a deep sigh I took a calming breath before answering him in an evasive manner.

“Mmmyes, Mademoiselle Daae has got a great voice. She’s very talented.”

“I bet she’s talented in more ways than one!” He nudged my ribs with his elbow and laughed a little too loud at his own joke. I let out the sigh I had been holding onto earlier. He didn’t seem to notice so I excused myself and left my father to his own explorations of the Opera house.  


* * *

I sat at my desk in the cupboard that served as my office, with my head in my hands. My father had a tendency of giving me a headache only using his mere presence. Speaking of presence…

“Christine will not listen to me. She’s in her teenage years and independence and rebellion seem to be at the forefront of her mind.”

“You know, other people knock when they enter someone’s office.”

“Yes well other people use the door. Your move.”

I groaned and leaned my head on the table while Erik took the only other seat in the room. We had chosen this room as my office since out of the available rooms, it was the only one in which Erik had a direct connection to. One he used quite often. I didn’t mind though. The room was definitely not made to be an office for two, but the company made up for the lack of space. 

“So what do you suggest we do?”

“I’m thinking the only way to convince her to stay away is if _you_ talked to her.”

“Mmm… I figured. I’ll try not to walk into her closet again.”

“Though it would be very educational and illustrative to say the least if you, in her presence, decided to _come out of the closet_.”

“I believe Confucius said ‘Silence is the true friend that never betrays’. You should try it!”

*knock knock knock*

Erik flew up from his chair and in behind the loose panel in the wall before I had the time to blink. I gave him a few extra seconds to secure the latches before I welcomed my guest to come in.

It was my father who stepped in over the threshold.

“Greetings son. Who were you speaking to?”

“Myself. It’s the only way to get an intelligent answer around here.”

His guffaw rattled the very floor itself.

“I’ve gotten you a present, son! You will be escorting little Mademoiselle Christine to dinner tonight. Spare no expenses. Be charming and show her why everyone wants a Chagny man.”

The urge to facepalm was close to unbearable. 

“You’ve set me up on a date? What did you say exactly? Did you promise her anything? Father please, I’d like to handle my romantic affairs myself thank you.”

“No need to thank me son! I’m sure you would have done the same thing for me!” He winked at me and was out of the door before I could get another word in. Erik came out from his hiding place once my fathers footsteps had traversed further down the corridor. 

“Are you sure you two are related? He seems…” he trailed off in search for a good word to describe my fathers complacent attitude. 

“I know. I got my mental capacities from my mother. Never understood what she sees in that man.” 

“You don’t seem too fond of your father then”

“After such a statement, are you surprised?”

“Guess not. But at least now you have the perfect time to get Christine alone to sort out the misunderstanding.”

I hid my face in my hands and sighed for what seemed like the umpteenth time that day. I didn’t want to go on a boring dinner and have awkward conversation with a teenage girl. I wanted to have complex conversations about philosophers and artists throughout history with Erik below the Opera. I wanted to spend the evening leaning back onto his couch with a glass of fine wine in my hand and his beautiful music in my ears. 

“Erik?”

“Yes?”

“May I come down to your place tonight? Will you play me some piano? I need something to look forward to if I have to take Christine to dinner tonight.”

“By all means. I’ll wait for you here then. And keep your chin up, Christine isn’t that bad, she’s just being a typical teenager at the moment. Can’t really blame her for hoping someone such as you would chase after her.”

I know he was trying to cheer me up. It worked. 

* * *

 

In all honesty, the dinner with Christine really wasn’t that bad. I told her flat out that I really wasn’t looking for a wife at the moment, and that it had nothing to do with her. An old cliché I know, but it was true! She seemed saddened at first but understood and hoped we could be good friends. When we had talked about the different productions for a while I couldn’t help but ask about the _spawns of malice_ as Erik had put it. She told me about the years of bullying. Apparently Christine had the bed closest to the door in the main sleeping chamber, the worst spot of them all. Each time any of the other girls would pass by during the night (for a night-time trip to the loo) they would pull her hair, bump into her or in another way wake her up. They called her the “doormat” among many other non flattering names. 

“But now I’ve got my own room! I mean, of course I share it with Meg but that’s like the best thing that could have happened!”

“Is there anything I can do to help you Christine?”

She chewed on her lower lip for a while before meeting my eyes again. 

“Well, if you’re truly not looking for a fiancé at the moment, would you mind it terribly if we kept this pretends up? The look on their faces when I exited the Opera on your arm was priceless. We don’t have to go further than a few dinners every now and then. I know it won’t mean anything, but it felt great to rub it in their faces. If it’s not too much to ask.”

I couldn’t have asked for a better solution myself. This was a way to help the rising primadonna to build her confidence while keeping my father at bay.

“That is a great idea Christine. I will readily take you out to dinner every now and then and pretend to be your suitor under the condition that there will be no misunderstandings of my true feelings on the matter.”

She leaned forward over the table and whispered conspiratorially:

“It will be our secret.”  


* * *

I met up with Erik at my office half an hour later.

“So, how did it go?”

“Surprisingly well. She’s a pleasant girl, albeit somewhat naïve. All in all, we had a great night and I’ll take her out again next week.”

“You… but I thought you…” his shoulders slumped and the smile fell from his face.

“I’ll take her out again to keep this charade up. That way the chorus girls will stay off her back and my father will keep off mine. Wait… were you jealous?”

“Perhaps you _too_ should try out the ‘Silence that never betrays’…”

Grinning from ear to ear we made our way through the panel in the wall and left the office for an evening of non-silence.


	8. A late night talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be warned, lots of wordplays and jokes coming up ahead!

“So lately I’ve been writing this piece that’s got you know… passion in it.” Erik started off when I was about to open our second bottle of wine for the evening. 

“Is that so? What happened to your requiem?”

“Mmmm… I just wasn’t in the right mood to finish it.”

“You mean dark, gloomy, lonely and angry?”

“When you say it like that I seem like an angry spirit.”

“…says the phantom that haunts the Opera.”

“Good point. Now wipe that silly smirk off your face and listen to this. It’s just a draft so don’t expect it to be perfect right away.” Erik seemed a bit nervous as he sat behind the piano. He started off a cheerful song that quickly built in tempo. 

“Merde!” He quit playing and clenched his fists. He must have played it wrong somehow and which resulted in making him even more tense. He tried again with the same result. This time he was close to smashing his fists down unto the keys. He stopped his hands a mere inch away from impact.

_He needs to relax before he does something stupid._

“Take a deep breath and go again. You’ve got this because music is your _forte_.”

He snorted and his shoulders relaxed slightly.

“Do all your jokes fall _flat_?”

“Hey, I’ve been told I’m pretty _sharp_.”

He was chuckling by now.

“Fine. I’ll go again if you keep quiet. I’ll only take a _minuet_.”

Third time’s the charm. He went through the piece perfectly. I was blown away yet again by this outstanding musician. The song was a happy one with two separate melodies that was played one after the other. Halfway through the piece the melodies mingled and created something more. They fit perfectly together, and combined they seemed to unlock another dimension of the song. Like the combination was something greater than the sum of it’s parts. The song ended too quickly for my taste. I wanted to bask in that feeling far longer.

“More. Play me more.” He smiled but shook his head no.

“I haven’t written anything more I’m afraid.” 

“So write then! It felt like I was there.” I closed my eyes and tried to describe the feeling. “There was a melody that found it’s counterpart and they and created something together. Something good. Great even. There was a longing, a yearning for each other when they were apart. And when they got together they created a happiness that blossomed into a colourful bouquet. It was joyful really but…” I couldn’t put my finger on it, but something was missing from the song. Something crucial. 

“But…?” Erik asked as he tilted his head to the side.

“But it isn’t finished. Something is missing. There is a magnificent build up towards the end of the song but then the crescendo never comes. Something is holding them back. The feeling it leaves me with is both good and bad. I feel giddy but very frustrated.”

“I know the feeling.” He ran a hand over his neck. “What if… they don’t know how to progress? A mishap might ruin everything.”

 _Is he talking about his mistakes earlier on? God that man sets high standards for himself._

“Ruin? No. Then you simply start over.”

“What if it isn’t the same the second time around?”

_Isn’t the same? Didn’t he have note sheets?_

“It will be.”

“But what if it isn’t? What then?”

_Is he afraid he’ll play it differently? I had heard about the phantoms unreasonable demands but never realised he would be just as hard on himself as he is on the Operas management._

“Then I’m sure it will be great anyhow. I wasn’t kidding when I said music was your forte Erik. Or… well… it was supposed to be a pun but that doesn’t make it less true. Your musical talents know no bounds.”

He cast down his eyes and turned to the piano once again while muttering:  
“Music yes, but not passion.”

_What was he on about?_

* * *

Another bottle of wine and conversation was starting too loosen up a lot. 

“So when did you realise you were… a fan of the man so to speak?”

“Quite a few years ago. I’d never felt anything in particular for the other sex really. It was when my teacher in archery got drenched in a downpour that I was put in a tight spot. Quite literally.”

“Archery? Impressive. Though I assume your predicament was _treble_ some?”

“Yes. The _tromboner_ was _treblesome_ indeed.”

By this time, Erik had to put his glass down onto the table. The risk of spilling the rest of his wine was impending if his laughter escalated even further. It was the merry kind of laughter though. The laughter among friends. He didn’t laugh _at_ me but rather _with_ me. 

“Tromboner! You’ve got to be kidding me.” Again his mask shifted on his face. I could see red mottled skin on his cheek and part of his nose was gone. I didn’t get a good look and I couldn’t very well ask him to be still while I studied him. The alcohol may have loosened him up but that wouldn’t sit well with him. He was trying to catch his breath and the mask slid into place again. I would have none of that.

“Are you calling me a _lyre_?”

That sent him into another fit of laughter. Sadly he covered his face in his hands. My curiosity wasn’t satisfied though.

“Your turn. Why do you carry a mask?”

His laughter died out and he sat there simply looking at his hands before answering:

“Because I’m hideous without it.”

“Were you in some kind of accident?”

“No. I was born like this. I never knew my father, but there have been times when I’ve considered the possibility of him being the devil himself. I guess I’ll ask him when I die.”

“Mind if I tag along? My preferences for men is going to send me down that route anyhow. Might as well have good company along the way.”

Finally he met my eyes and the smile he gave me was grateful. 

“Yeah. I’d like that. Not even hell can be that bad with you there.”

“Oh, I’m not so sure about that. Perhaps I have to _scale back_ on my puns if you’re going to have to stand my presence for all eternity.”

“Oh, I don’t mind them in the least. I think they’re _clef-er_.”

We laughed whole heartedly both of us. 

“You know what Erik. I can think of far worse punishments than spending eternity with you.”

“Why thank you Raoul. That is most kind of you. More wine?” He was about to pour me yet another glass of that delicious and dangerous liquid. 

“No thank you. I’ve had quite enough as it is. I’m not sure I can find my way back through your labyrinth at this point. But that will not stop me!” I stood up and managed to walk a few steps before my world started spinning at an alarming speed. Erik was there before I lost my footing. 

“Woah, take it easy there Raoul. I’m guessing I shouldn’t be surprised that your not walking straight with the amount of alcohol already in your system.”

“I’m far from straight. I thought you knew that by now.”

“Raoul, you look like you’re about to pass out and you _still_ crack jokes?” 

I was in fact about to pass out. My eyelids were surprisingly heavy and my legs felt like jelly. I was about to go out any minute now. I just had one last thing to say first: 

“What can I say. To me they are happiness, understanding, intelligence and a common ground. That’s what they _cymbalize_.”

The last thing I heard before everything went black was Erik's chuckle.


	9. Hangovers and equals

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the lovely comments and kudos! They make my day!
> 
> I havn't had time to update as quickly as I used to since I started working, but I can assure you that I'm still here. :) 
> 
> Please read and review! :D 
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* * *

I pulled the cover closer and took a deep breath. Why did my blanket smell like Erik? Not like I was complaining or anything. I tried to open my eyes but my eyelids weren’t cooperating. 

_Perhaps it’s still too early._

Well the room was dark so the sun wasn’t shining in through my windows and there was no rustling sound from the kitchen down the hall so it couldn’t be time to get up just yet. I inhaled that wonderful smell of Erik, turned around and went to sleep again.  


* * *

Some time later I awoke again. This time I was slightly more conscious. 

“Good morning Raoul. I was wondering when you were about to come to.”

 _Erik._

I opened my eyes. He sat in a chair opposite the couch I was sleeping on. His appearance was immaculate. I on the other hand must have looked like some kind of road kill. I ran my hand through my hair to sort it out while I tried sitting up.

_Woah! Bad idea!_

I quickly laid back down again when my head started pounding. I hid my face in my hands and groaned. 

“That bad huh? Well I guess you used up todays happiness yesterday. Here, drink this. You need water to make that headache subside.” 

I peeked at him from between my fingers. He was holding out a large keg towards me. I took a deep breath, sat up and took the keg from his hands. 

“Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it.”

I emptied the keg in a manner of seconds and placed it on the coffee table before gathering the blanket closer to me and snuggling further into the couch. 

_Wait. I didn’t remember getting a blanket. Last thing I remember was me being my wonderfully witty self and Erik being there to chuckle along with me. He must have given me the blanket._ I smiled at the thought. 

“Penny for your thoughts.”

“Thank you for letting me stay here for the night. I’m not sure I would have been able to make it back in the state I was in.”

“You’re kidding right? You can barely find your way though the Opera when sober. Even if I had followed you through my caves and to the front door you still wouldn’t have been able to make it home. Either you would have been mugged or taken in by the gendarmes. I figured my sofa was the better option, even if it’s not made for sleeping.”

“Oh I quite disagree.” I said while lying down once again, closing my eyes. 

“You’re not done sleeping by now? Do you know what time it is?”

“No. But I figure it’s far to late to arrive at the Opera without a good excuse as to where I’ve been. The most plausible excuse for my crumpled clothes and dishevelled exterior would be that I had spent the night with a mistress. But I am to act as if I currently court Christine so we can have none of that. I simply figure the Opera can manage a day without me. It won’t crumble without my constant attention.”

“You better hope it doesn’t since we currently reside under it.”

I snorted. “Will you play me anything? Please?”

“I can’t speak for you but some of us actually have an Opera to run.”

“Hey, I said _please_! And if the Opera crumbles you get to say _I told you so_.”

Erik stood after a few seconds and went to pick up a nearby violin. 

“Well if my Opera is in pieces by the time I get up I’m going to put the blame on you.”

“No you wont.” I yawned and snuggled more into the sofa. My hair was ruined anyway, might as well go all in. 

He played a soft tune. It filled my heart with calm and composed joy. I felt proud, independent and in control. It was the musical equivalent of a smile. It was probably some kind of lullaby because within minutes I was fast asleep again. 

* * *

When I woke up again next time Erik was nowhere to be seen. By the time he got back I had freshened up and started upon making a dinner for two with what little I could find in his kitchen. I may have had servants make me dishes for years now, but when I was a kid I used to follow our chef Jean around just about everywhere he went. He taught me the basics in the great art of cooking and I was about to use my skills to impress Erik. 

Erik stood in the doorway with his mouth slightly agape as I turned around with the finished omelette. 

“There you are! Right on time. It is just finished. My old chef used to say that a sturdy omelette is the best way for a good man to start the day.”

“There are so many flaws in that reasoning, I don’t know where to start pointing them out! This can hardly be called the start of the day since it is well past three pm. I can hardly be called good since I’m the phantom and quite possibly the son of Satan, and that is also a reason why I can hardly be called a man.” Even through his incessant reasoning he sat down at the table I had set for two. When I served him half of the magnificent meal his stomach rumbled.

“Good or not. That is the sound of a hungry man if I ever heard one.”

A hrmpf was the only comeback before he started eating. 

“This is… this is actually great Raoul.”

“What do you mean _actually_? Of course it is great. I am the one who made it after all.”

“How do you manage to get a single piece down if you are so _full of yourself_?”

“I am a man of many talents. I’m sure I can manage to eat, brag and admire the view at the same time.” I wiggled my eyebrows playfully. 

Erik shook his head but at the same time he smiled. 

“You are one of a kind Raoul, you know that?”

I had heard that. Along with lines of ‘You’re far too kind Monsieur le Vicomte’. What I really wanted to know though was if I was _his_ kind. He knew I preferred male company of the cultivated and intellectual kind and he must have noticed me flirting. Right? Was his flirting just innocent banter or did it mean something more? There was only one way to find out. I mentally braced myself. 

“Aye. But Erik… Am I _your_ kind?” His eyes met mine and I let my features show the sincerity of my question. 

“I’m flattered. Above all else Raoul, I’m flattered. I’m flattered that you consider a drunken evening with me to be a good pastime. I’m flattered that you trust me enough to sleep in my proximity. On my couch none the less. Your facial expressions when I play you my music is flattery alone. You are amazing Raoul, in every way possible. So I’m flattered that you would ask me when the answer isn’t mine to give. It is in your hands already. Along with my heart, my music and everything else I am.”

“I’ll take it.” My answer was quick. My eyes never leaving his. “Everything. I’ll take it. You understand me and I find myself longing for our next encounter. You challenge me verbally and I grow in your presence, as I’m sure you do in mine. We’re equals.”

The hopeful smile that had begun to grow on Erik faltered at my last sentence. He got up and left the room but came back within seconds. 

“Come here.” He pulled me to my feet with one hand and held up a mirror with the other. “See for yourself. As much as I hate it, we’re far from equals… You put Da Vincis David to shame, and I’m…”

“A tall, lean, muscular man with eyes like molten gold?”

He opened his mouth but changed his mind and closed it again. Then a charming blush coloured his cheeks. 

“Raoul…”

And that’s when I kissed him.


	10. Inspiration and C maj 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FLUFF!  
> As always, reviews make me very happy! All my best to all my readers!

* * *

When I pressed my lips against his he froze like a statue. I was just about to pull away when he melted and his lips started moving against mine. It was the closest to heaven I’d even been. I carefully placed my hands on his upper arms and pressed against him again. His lips were soft and warm. And gone. 

He pulled away from me and placed a hand on my shoulder. 

“Wait Raoul. You have no idea what hides under this mask”

“A man with impeccable style in clothing, witty humour and feeling for music that is unlike any other.”

“You will run screaming.”

“Try me.”

“No!”

“Why not?”

“Because… your company means too much to me. I don’t want to risk losing it by showing you my face.”

“And you won’t believe me no matter how many times I say I won’t run?”

“No. I won’t.”

“So don’t show me then. I had feelings for you long before I knew your name. I’m sure they can grow much more before I know your face.”

His eyes bore deeply into mine and I met his gaze unflinchingly. Finally his gaze fluttered down to my lips and he closed the distance between us. He gave me a soft kiss that barely touched my lips. 

_Oh he was such a tease._

I nibbled at his lower lip and he groaned. My arms had sneaked their way around him and pulled him slowly but surely to my chest. He placed one of his hands at the back of my head and spread his fingers in my hair. He smiled into the kiss and I found myself doing the same. We broke off the kiss but not the hug as we decided to catch our collective breath. Forehead against forehead… or well… forehead against mask I stared into glittering yellow eyes. Eyes that seemed to sparkle with joy. Suddenly, a realization seemed to hit him. His smile faltered somewhat and his gaze became distant. He mumbled:

“That’s it. It’s not supposed to end there. I’ll be right back.” Where after he detangled himself and left the room. 

_Well… that was… anticlimactic._

‘It is not supposed to end there’, was he talking about the kiss? If he was, then leaving the room was kind of counterproductive. I figured there was only one way to find out and left in search of my phantom. _My_ phantom. I liked the sound of that. _Mine._ My smile could rival that of the Cheshire cat despite my befuddlement over Erik's reaction.

I found him in his study, furiously scribbling on pieces of parchment. Then he picked up the nearby violin and played a melody at a hurried pace. 

_Wait. Hadn’t I heard that song before? But at half of the pace he was keeping. Or perhaps a fourth…_

It was the passionate song he had played on the piano the night before. Or some of it was. Some parts were new, or at least so I thought since my memories from last night was kind of blurry. Erik's fingers were in a blur too as they either adjusted the bow on the violin or wrote down notes or comments on the note sheets.

“So inspiration struck hard?”

“You could say that.” He smiled but didn’t stop for a second. When he had scribbled over five sheets he squeezed his eyes shut and exhaled. Once he had placed the bow on the violin for the third time without actually playing anything he seemed to give up. He placed the instrument on the desk and walked up to me. 

“My inspiration has run dry. Would you kiss me again?”

 _Is he serious? Am I his muse or is he making up an excuse to kiss me again? As if he would have to… Well I’m not about to look a gift horse in the mouth._

So I kissed him again. And he kissed me back. Again. This time it was his turn to pull me closer though. Not that I was complaining. With one of his hands on my lower back and the other one on caressing my neck I melted to the floor in a puddle. I let my tongue dart out to taste his lips. It was divine! His tongue tentatively met mine and that was the start of a long and playful kiss in which our tongues would battle for dominance one second and then lovingly stroke each other the next. When he separated he whispered: 

“Thank you. C maj 7.”

“What?”

“The finishing chord. An alluring ending to the passionate build up that leaves the audience wanting more.”

“You can say that again.” I went in for another kiss which he readily provided.

“I should type that down.” He stole one last kiss before we broke apart. Some scribbles later and he was finished.

“There. Done! Who would have thought kissing was such a good source of inspiration?”

“I think you should look into that more thoroughly. You might find yourself a vein of gold.”

“I already feel like the richest man alive with such a treasure in my arms.”

Even though that was beyond cheesy I couldn’t help but smile as a blush crept unto my cheeks. 

“So that song is about us?”

“I might have thought about you and our moments together while writing it yes. It was far easier to come up with happy melodies when someone brings joy into your life. “ He smiled and looked down. He had no reason to feel ashamed or embarrassed by either his words or his music. Definitely not his music. I had just found the key to the locker guarding his feelings. If anyone was about to be a rich man, it was me. 

“Will you play it to me again. As it should be played, and not in super speed?” 

“Can’t keep up?” He winked at me as he picked up the violin again.

I held up my hand. “No, wait. I want it on the piano.”

His eyes widened and his jaw slacked. “You want… ehm… Raoul we’ve just…”

When my mind finally comprehended his train of thoughts I blushed to the very roots of my hair. I was completely mortified. 

“No! No! I want _you to play it again_ on the piano this time!”

“Hehehe. I know. I just like seeing you blush.”

That comment made me blush even deeper. 

“You are a _horrible_ man, you know that?”

“So I’ve been told. Never in this context though.” He winked at me and started off towards the piano. 

“You’re lucky you’re cute.” I mumbled and followed him into the living room once again. He turned around and gave me a serious smile this time.

“I may never understand what you see in me, but I am very happy that you do somehow find me appealing. Even if _cute_ probably is the last word I would have chosen to describe myself.” 

“Oh, but you are. It’s right up there with witty, charming and horrible.” 

He snorted. “Now who’s witty?”

“I can’t let you have all the glory now can I? Now play me that song or I’ll kiss you again.”

He had started off towards the piano even before I’d finished my sentence, but when his mind caught up with my words he turned once again.

“Was that supposed to be a threat? As a well known phantom I feel obliged to teach you how to come up with decent thr…” I cut him off with another kiss. God, his lips were amazing. A short minute of nibbling caresses and caring touches later we broke apart.

“Too slow.”

“I don’t mind.” His gaze never left my lips. “But I doubt I’ll remember how to play the piano after such a kiss. Even more so the specific notes.”

I smiled. “It’s not your memory that’s lacking. I know just what you need.”

“Which is?”

“You my good Sir, are in need of some _inspiration_.”


	11. Moments and momentums

The next few days went by in a blur of kissing, talking, eating and composing. In just a couple of days he had written over half an Opera. Perhaps the kissing actually was a good source of inspiration. I didn’t have bad conscience for leaving the Opera above alone for a couple of days. I was doing my duty to this establishment by pleasing it’s creative mastermind. And myself for that matter.

Erik had written down instructions on how to get to his home from the world above and vice versa. He had given me the safest route and drilled me in the twists and turns many times over till I knew it by heart. Even then he wasn’t fully okay with letting me walk alone. We were out of food though and I took it upon myself to go shopping. He couldn’t very well show himself above ground but he could follow me through the tunnels. 

“It’s completely unnecessary Erik. I know the route forwards and backwards by now, and you need to get that inspiration out before your head explodes.” We had just had a half an hour long make out session which in turn had triggered another of Erik's composing frenzies. 

“Are you sure Raoul? Take the torch and the map with you, and if you have any doubt whatsoever you stay where you are and call for me okay? And I’ll come get you.” He said all this with his eyes going over the latest note sheet. 

I rolled my eyes at his overprotectiveness. “Yes, yes, I know. I’ll be back before you know it.”

“Looking forward to it.”

“Bye.” I grabbed the torch and a satchel to carry the groceries in. I was just about to exit the room when his voice stopped me.

“Haven’t you forgotten something?”

“I’ve got the map, the torch, my pouch, and a satchel. What more could I possibly need for a short trip to the market?”

“Nothing. I just thought I would get a goodbye kiss.”

I smiled and approached him. “Already run out of inspiration? That was quick.”

“No. I just find myself addicted to your kisses.” If his words hadn’t made my irritation subside away then his kiss surely did. 

My way tracking up through the caves was uneventful. On my way back down I got curious. Not many people was shopping at this hour and I had quickly found the food I needed, so I was ahead of schedule. Erik would probably not be expecting me for at least half an hour. He had mentioned putting up traps in these caves, but he didn’t want to elaborate when I had asked him about it. What kind of traps was he putting up? It was probably traps that looked far more dangerous then they really were. Simply to scare people off. The only clue I’d ever gotten on the subject was given to me the day before as he led me trough his maze once again to make sure I got it right. 

_“You do know how to swim, right?”_

_“Yes of course.”_

_“Good good.”_

_“Why do you ask?”_

_*Incoherent mumbling.*_

_Perhaps there were more underground lakes than the one practically invading his home._

Halfway down through the tunnels I put down the groceries at a fork in the road and decided to see if I could figure out what kind of setups Erik had made up down there. I held the torch in front of me but nothing looked out of the ordinary. It looked just like any other cave. I picked up a rock and threw it further along the path in hope that it would trigger something. It didn’t.

_Was this trap further into the cave rather than at the very entrance?_

A cautious step. And then another. My nerves were on end and I was ready to bolt at the smallest sound. The cave widened behind a left turn. Another few steps into the widened cave and my foot got caught in something. Then everything happened very fast. 

I had tripped over a rope that went along the floor and which had pulled some kind of lever. A large trap door opened just a few inches in front of my feet. In the sheen from the torch I could see large stakes at the bottom of the pit. I struggled to gain my balance but the tripping wire was snared around my boot. I threw the torch as hard as I could in front of me to use the momentum from torch to my advantage. I fell backwards and stumbled into the side of the cave. The floor wasn’t as smooth here as on the other paths and before I new it my other foot got caught in a crack in the floor and a few stones fell from a nearby stack to cage me in more effectively.

My foot was the only thing caught though. And once I seemed to be out of the immediate danger I tried to pull myself loose. That was easier said then done. Without the torch I saw absolutely nothing and no matter how hard I pulled at my foot it simply wouldn’t come loose. Another few minutes of fruitless pushing and pulling and I was ready to give up. I swallowed my pride and took a deep breath: 

“Eeerrriiiik!” Silence. I repeated my call a few times and then listened.

I didn’t have to wait long before Erik rushed into the cave I was in. I mused over the fact that this probably was the first time I had ever heard Erik's footsteps. 

“Raoul?!” I didn’t have to see his face to understand his emotions. His voice said it all. He threw himself towards the edge of the pit.

“Over here!” I have no idea how he could see anything in the pitch black depths of the caves but before I new it his hands were on my cheeks and I could feel his breath on my face.

“Raoul. Are you alright? Are you hurt?” His hands shimmered down my torso in search for any wounds.

“I’m fine. I didn’t fall into the pit. My foot got stuck in this crevasse though. I guess you could say I’m caught between a rock and a hard place. Literally. And I lost your torch.”

He exhaled. ”I couldn’t care less about that torch.” He managed to roll the heaviest stone to the side and with joined forced we pulled my foot loose.

“Does your foot hurt?”

“Not much. Not half as much as my pride.” It was meant to be playful but Erik wasn’t in the mood. He placed his hand on my cheek once again.

“You scared the life out of me Raoul. I thought you… that…” His voice broke. He seemed more hurt that I was even if his pain wasn’t physical. So I kissed him. His other hand found my neck and he let all his desperation and care for me show as he deepened the kiss. We broke off and he caught my hand in his and brought it to his heart. It was beating wildly from the adrenalin rush and the loving kiss. 

“I can’t loose you. You mean far too much to me already.”

“I’m sorry I ventured off the path. My curiosity got the better of me. I won’t do it again.” He helped me up and offered me his arm as I tested if my foot would give away. The pain wasn’t horrible but I would probably walk with a limp for a couple of days. Erik put my arm around his shoulder and his arm around my waist as we made our way back to his home. I could have made it on my own two feet but I figured we both needed the closeness.

“So, how is your foot?” He asked again once we reached his home.

“Not that bad really. Want to do me a favour?”

“Of course. Anything.”

“Kiss and make it better?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. I hope you liked the chapter. If you did, please leave a comment! ^^


	12. The signet ring

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the comments and the kudos. I now present a slightly longer chapter than usual. :) 
> 
> As always; Comments make me happy, and constructive criticism is always welcome!

* * *

“Do you really have to leave? Can’t you just send them a message?”

“I need to show up at the chateau before my father storms this place thinking I’ve been kidnapped.”

He snorted. “Please. If I kidnapped you I would never know if your feelings for me were your own or things you were forced to feel. It would be like living a lie. I know that it’s not the right thing to do but it does seem like a good option at times like this.”

“I’ll be back before you know it. I got to check up on my horse, my butler, my brother and well… my responsibilities as a Vicomte.”

“How long will you be gone?”

“A few days perhaps. I’ll be as quick as I possibly can.”

“Would you give me a date? Or a time? … please?” 

His yellow eyes were saddened and there was a tinge of fear in them. This was deeper than he made it seem, and I needed to know why. 

“Erik, what’s wrong? What are you afraid of?”

He cast his eyes down and gave a humourless chuckle. “I keep forgetting you can see straight into my soul through my eyes.”

I placed my hand on his strong jaw and lifted his head towards mine again.

“Tell me.” I whispered. A long pause, a small caress, and a deep breath.

“I’m afraid you’ll realize how amazing your life is out in the real world. I’m afraid you’ll find someone else or simply understand that I can’t give you everything you deserve. Which in turn will lead you to stay above ground. That’s why I wanted a fixed time period. So I’ll know when to give up hope.”

My heart broke into a million pieces at his words. _Give up hope? No. Never._

“I promise you Erik that I will come back. I give you my word.” I kissed him. “And this.”

I pulled my ring off of my right hand and handed it to him. 

“This is the de Chagny signet ring.” I placed it in his hand and closed it with both of mine. “Keep it safe for me till my return. I’ll be back within three days.” He smiled. 

“I will. And if you ever need anything you know where to find me.” 

One more kiss and I was on my way out of the Opera and on towards the Chagny estate.  


* * *

Even before I’d dismounted the horse I heard the first comment.

“I told you he was fine!” It was my brother Philippe talking to a group of servants. When I looked up they all smiled and waved. I handed the borrowed horse to one of the boys in the stable before joining the gossiping group. 

“Let’s hear it. Who made up the most spectacular story explaining my _disappearance_?” 

“Welcome home stranger. I barely recognized you with all that scruff!” Philippe slapped my back in greeting. Jean spoke up:

“Well we figured you had either found yourself a nice young lady, or it had something to do with the running the Opera. Like charming other patrons or composers. Though the overall belief was that you’d simply lost your way.” I truly didn’t mind that they all chuckled at my expense. I’d missed them the few days I’d been away. They were my friends and family and even if the more part of me wanted nothing more than to get back to my phantom, it felt good to be home again.  


* * *

Two days and twenty-three hours after I’d said my goodbyes to Erik and I was finishing up the last tasks at the mansion. I had to get back within one hour. I knew Erik wouldn’t do anything drastic if I wasn’t right on time. _Probably._ I wasn’t about to take any chances though.

The day before I had spent the evening on an outing with Philippe. We rode through the woods and spoke about anything and everything. He was indeed about to propose to Celine and was hoping that they would get married within a few months. Then he wanted to know why I hadn’t been at the estate in quite a few days. I said I’d fallen in love with the Opera. Which wasn’t a lie per say! I _had been_ in the Opera when I had fallen in love. 

_Did I say love? Had it come to that already?_

Well it is some kind of crush, that much is certain. But love? Love is so much more than great kisses and pleasurable company. It’s more than a shared joke or accomplishment. Love isn’t just lifting each other to new heights during the good times, but also supporting each other when times are hard. Love is pouring your heart out, sharing your thoughts and confessing your flaws. Love goes deeper than a mere crush on so many levels, and hadn’t seen Erik in all kinds of situations yet so it was a bit early to claim love. 

_But I can’t wait to get to know him better._  


* * *

 

I grabbed the satchel with my some of my belongings and got into the family carriage. The carriage ride back to the Opera felt like it took forever. I spent half of the time studying my hands. My sunburn clearly gave away on which finger I usually wear my ring. My tan skin stood in great contrast to the ghost of a ring now that now adorned my finger. My hand felt empty without the signet ring, but I knew it was safe with _my very own ghost_. 

When we finally arrived at the Opera I had a quarter of an hour to go. It would only take me five minutes to track through his tunnels to Erik's nest below ground. That left me ten minutes to…

“Monsieur le Vicomte! Welcome back. We’ve missed you. How are things with the family?”

“Good day Monsieur Reyer. It was fine thank you. How have things been at the Opera?”

“Fine fine. I was wondering whether you had been in contact with that composer in Lille that you mentioned a couple of weeks ago. We need to start practicing for the next big performance and the necessary manuscript and note sheets have yet to appear.”

“Ah yes. I’m in contact with another composer who is currently writing a new piece for this Opera. A passionate piece Monsieur. You will not be disappointed. I don’t know whether the piece is finished yet or not. I can’t tell you off-hand. But I will bring you updates later today or first thing in the morning.”

“Great! Thank you Monsieur le Vicomte! I’m so glad that you are our patron. You seem to truly care for the Opera and that warms an old mans heart.” He took my hand in both of his and shook it warmly. “Have you by any chance seen the large crystal vase that we got from one of our supporters after last nights show?”

I had not, where after he insisted on showing me this large colourful spectacle that was currently residing close to the Operas back entrance. I kept sneaking glances of my pocket watch as he showed me the way and talked about the marvellous gift and how it would look great in the Operas main entrance if it only had some kind of pillar to stand on. 

“Hmm. Yes. Good idea.” Fifteen minutes had quickly turned to seven and I tried to make up an excuse to leave. “Monsieur Reyer, I’m sure you have a lot of things to attend to. I know I do. I’ll keep in contact regarding the new manuscript. Au revoir!” We said our goodbyes and I set off towards my office, and the entrance to the tunnel that would lead me to my Erik. 

I was five steps away from the office door when I heard someone call for me:

“Raoul!”

_So close! I was soo close…_

“Christine.” I turned around. “What a pleasure seeing you again.” I kissed her hand.

“Likewise Raoul. I have tonight off if you wanted to perhaps… take me to dinner?”

“I’m sorry Christine but tonight is not a good night. “I have planned…” I trailed off. In the corner of my eye I could see a group of chorus girls hiding their mouths behind their hands, looking at us and giggling. I couldn’t very well tell her that she wasn’t included in any of my plans for the near future while they were surveying us. Who knows what they would say if I let her down now. But I really didn’t want to take her out tonight though. Not tonight of all nights. Therefore I ended up saying: “I have planned for a big surprise this weekend. And I need to make some preparations tonight, but if you would do me the honour of grazing me with your presence on Saturday it would truly make my night.”

“Of course Raoul. That sounds wonderful!” She giggled and we parted ways. My pocket watch told me I had less then one minute remaining. I would be late. I left my satchel in my office, unhitched the latches on the hidden doorway and stepped into the darkness. I shot forward before my eyes had adjusted to the darkness. The result of that being that I stumbled right into Erik. 

“You came back.” Then his lips were on mine and his arms encircled my waist. My own glorious piece of heaven. I sighed in relief and kissed him back. I kissed down along his neck mumbling:

“Yes. And I’m on time. I’m even thirty seconds early.”

“And here I though I was being neurotic since I was counting the _hours_.” He chuckled. 

_God! I’d missed that sound._

“I gave you my word. I treasure your trust.”

“As I’ve treasured your ring. He took my hand and lead it from his neck down along a chain to my ring that hung as a pendant on his chest. “I carried it with me everywhere I went so that I could remind myself that you’re real. And that you would come back.”

“Good. Then it has served its purpose.”

“Come Raoul. I have a meal prepared downstairs.” He took my hand and led me along the tunnel. I laced my fingers with his and happily followed him home.


	13. Bad boys and shrinking effect

“No, no. Don’t put the dishes like that. If you place them like this they will dry so much faster.” I took the plates from Erik's hands and arranged them in the correct way. 

Really, what would he do without me? 

Erik snorted. “I figure you've had how-to-place-dishes-the-optimal-way-tutoring too eh?”

I dismissed his sarcasm. “Not specifically no. But I spent lots of time in the kitchen as a kid.”

“Mmm. Your chef Jean. Yes you mentioned him. He seems like a good man.” 

“He is. He taught me about the important things in life; To stand by your word, to play by the rules and also how to make a mouth-watering baguette.”

“Haha. You seem to have it covered.”

I dried my hands and handed Erik the towel. After the culinary dinner I had offered to do the dishes but Erik insisted on helping me. It took quite some time since we got side-tracked talking and kissing. Erik still wore my ring on the chain around his neck. Seeing it filled me with pride. 

“But really? Have you _always_ played by the rules? Have you never done anything that goes against the laws of God or society?”

“You mean besides sticking my tongue down another mans throat at every given opportunity?”

“Raoul! I thought they at least taught you proper language while raising you.” Erik blushed, but his smile told me he wasn’t really offended by my words. Or their meaning for that matter.

“Who’s Monsieur I-always-play-by-the-rules-and-never-use-foul-language now?” 

“Are you actually challenging the Phantom of this Opera on who’s the most rebellious?” His yellow eyes were shining with merriment. 

_I can’t back out now. Or well… I can. But what would be the fun in that?_

“You think that I can’t do anything naughty only because I’m a noble, is that it?”

“Naughty yes. Illegal no.” He leaned back against the kitchen counter and crossed his arms over his chest still grinning like a fool. 

“Well I’ll have to prove you wrong then.” I started looking around us for something I could nick. There was a miniature figure on the shelf that served as his pantry. It was a monkey holding cymbals. The monkey wore a red vest and sat on top of a black chest. I picked up the chest with the tiny monkey and proudly exclaimed:

“There! I’ve now snatched this priceless piece of ornament.”

“Give that back.”

“Right. Sorry.” I handed him the decorative animal which was soon back at it’s original place. Erik chuckled. 

“You are truly the worst thief ever. First of all, thieves do not announce their theft. And second, you’re supposed to grab something and run, not just stand there and then hand it back after a few seconds. Truly Raoul you’re…”

I grabbed a spare mask from the drying rack and made a run for it. Giggling with excitement I rushed out of the kitchen and through the living room.

“You’re a quick learner. I’ll give you that! But you can’t outrun the Phantom!” He wasn’t far behind me but I pressed on willing myself to go just a little bit faster. 

“Oh! I don’t know about that. These tunnels are probably too tight for his _big ego_ to squeeze through!” I was running along the edge of the lake as I heard him again.

“You will never _make it_ to the tunnels you foolish fop!” 

A hand grasped my shirt from behind and pulled me off balance. I fell towards the lake. Erik seemed to realise that I needed help a little too late. He grasped my hand but it only resulted into both of us falling into the ice-cold lake. 

_Oh Lord have mercy! This is beyond freezing!_

I reached the surface spluttering and splashing. Erik was already heaving himself out of the water and onto dry land. He held out his hand and helped me up. 

“Raoul. Are you okay?”

“F-f-fine. Just fr-freezing.”

“I’m sorry bout that. Come, lets get you into dry cloths before you catch a cold.” He pulled me back towards his living room and told me to stay put. As he went to his room to pick out clothes for the both of us I started undressing. 

He came back a short time later in another black suit that looked just like the one he wore just a minute ago except this one was dry. He was carrying yet another outfit of the same kind along with a towel. By that time I had managed to get out of just about everything, the only piece of clothing left on me being my underwear. I gratefully accepted the towel and the clothes and started to dry myself off. When I was finished I tried handing the towel back to Erik but he didn’t take it. He was staring at my chest with his mouth slightly agape and his pupils dilated. I could help it. I flexed my six pack.

A small intake of breath from Erik before his yellow eyes flickered up to meet mine. I smiled and nodded knowingly. He raised an eyebrow.

“Who’s got a big ego now?”

“Want to know what else is big?” I was having so much fun! 

He gave me a once over and frowned. “What is?”

Now it was my time to blush. “Hey! The water is glacial!” I covered my neither regions with the towel. “The shrinking is only natural!”

“Hahaha, I know Raoul. Forgive me. I’m just teasing you. You look great by the way. You shouldn’t ever feel the need to cover up. I’ll let you change in peace.” He turned to leave.

“Neither should you.” I said to his retreating back. He just shook his head and kept on walking. 

* * *

 

“Erik, do you have a mirror?” I had almost finished dressing and I wanted to make sure to be as impeccable in this clothing as the original owner. 

“It’s behind the purple curtain close to the piano. Here I’ll show you.” Erik re-entered the living room and showed me the mirror as promised.

I adjusted the black bow tie in front of the mirror.

“You look great.”

“I look like you.” I met Erik's eyes in the mirror and smiled.

“Yes. My point exactly. You look great!” He winked at me. “No, but seriously. Aside from black not suiting the colour of your soul you look really handsome.”

“Something is missing though.” I reached for the spare mask that I’d grabbed from the kitchen. My loot if you wish. I held it up against my face. I had noticed the dents and indentations on the inside of the mask when I’d gotten dressed. The mask had given me a little information on the extent of Erik's deformation. It obviously wasn’t made for a normal face which was why it didn’t fit me. That didn’t stop me though. 

I pressed it to my face, straightened my back and said with my most booming voice:  
“I am the Opera ghost! You should all cower before me for I am the phantom. And neither God nor laws will stop me. Not even very _very_ cold lakes!”

Erik's concerned expression when I’d first tried on his mask soon changed to laughter. 

“You would make a horrible phantom too!”

“I would be an amazing phantom. Too bad this Opera has already got one.” I turned around, placed my hand on his neck and pulled him closer.

“Who would know I’d fall for such a bad boy.” I leaned in closer. His gaze fell to my lips and his pupils dilated again.

“Who would know you’d fall for a monster?” He whispered against my lips.

I growled at him. “Apparently this bad boy of mine needs some lecturing. You may now how to blackmail and steal, but I’ll teach you how to behave.” To prove my point (or disprove if you will) I closed the last distance and kissed him without abandon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hmm... See I don't know if I should write some really smutty chapters. Like change the rating to 'explicit' and write some lemony stuff. I can't promise it'll be good, but if you want to I'll give it a try.


	14. Signatures and instruments

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So. I haven't updated in a while. Sorry about that. I got caught up in the book series Highland Guard. 
> 
> In this chapter things will turn explicit. Don't like don't read. 
> 
> And as always, thank you for the kudos and the comments! They brighten my day!

After our impromptu make out session Erik had to do some finishing touches on his Opera. I mumbled something about how I’d rather have his touches finish _me_ , but he just playfully scolded me, gave me a peck on the cheek and disappeared into his own little world of music. 

I yawned and stretched. It had been a long day. I made myself ready for bed and went to see how far Erik had come. He was mouthing words while he seemed to be directing an invisible orchestra. He occasionally glanced down at the note sheets but more often than not he just closed his eyes and moved to the music only he could hear. I had told Erik on occasion that I’d wished there was some way for me to be in his head. He had winked at me telling me I was on his mind constantly. Cute, I know, but it truly must be amazing to experience music the way Erik does. He seems to see the potential in each instrument he surrounds himself with. 

“There. Done.” Erik finished writing on the scores. “You may hand this to Monsieur Reyer tomorrow.”

“Out of curiosity, what did you sign it with?” 

“Naturally I can’t sign it with O.G. That would raise suspicion.”

“O.G.?”

“Opera Ghost. My normal signature when contacting the managers.”

“How about your second alias then? Bertram?”

Erik cringed. “I gave you my name simply so that I would never have to hear that dreadful name again.”

“Are you sure that was the only reason?” I smiled and walked towards him. My mischievous smile brought a similar one to his face. I leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips. When I heard him moan softly I tugged his lower lip between my own. I sucked on it before letting my tongue venture into him to search out his. Erik laced his arms around me and pulled me impossibly closer as he mirrored my passion. His teeth grazed my upper lip as we broke apart and I groaned.

“Mmm… yes. Oh Bertram!”

Erik snorted and his yellow eyes seemed to shine with playfulness and desire. He growled: 

“You’ll pay for that.” And before I knew it I was pushed up against the closest wall with Erik's body pressed close to mine. His hands were running up and down my sides in some kind of attempt to tickle me. It didn’t tickle though. It turned me on. Erik's heavy breathing close to my ear combined with the glorious feeling of his lean muscular body holding mine in place was enough to get me rock hard.  
I tried to squirm my way out of the situation before Erik noticed. We hadn’t gone past kissing or teasing and I didn’t want to put him in an awkward situation. This resulted in Erik pressing towards me even tighter in an attempt to keep me in his grasp. His hip brushed up against the bulge in my trousers and I gasped at the sudden pulse of pleasure. Erik mistook my sudden intake of breath for success in his task of tickling me and doubled his efforts with a triumphant:

“Hah! Do you give in Monsieur le Vicomte?”

I closed my eyes and tried to picture things that’s not connected to Erik. Or his hands very close to where I needed them most. 

_Rain... Cold... Wet... Falling into the lake... Erik's suit plastered to his muscular frame. Damnation! Try again._

_Talking to Monsieur Reyer... Handing his note sheets... Written by Erik's hands… Erik's hand stroking up along the length of my cock. Fuck! It’s impossible. Wait? Did that just happen?_

I opened my eyes with another gasp and met his gaze. His pupils had dilated to the point where his eyes looked almost hazel. I could read the truth in his eyes before his latest action was repeated. His hand _had_ brushed up along the length of me, and was now doing so again in a deliciously slow pace.

I couldn’t move. I held my breath as if my next movement would shatter the world. A small smile tugged at Erik's lips as his hand started its journey returning down along my hard column.

“Now what do we have here Raoul? Is this that tromboner you spoke about earlier?”

I was just about to answer him when he grasped me fully within his hand and the air escaped from my lungs in a short puff. His smile widened.

“It seems like it is. How long have you hidden this from me?” he murmured in my ear as he covered my body with his and stroked me more firmly.

 _Sweet angels and all that is holy! This is amazing!_

I was in heaven. Surrounded by his smell, with his seductive voice in my ear and his talented hand around my cock I was completely at his mercy. And he seemed to know it.

“You know I’m very passionate about music Raoul. I want to be able to play all kinds of instruments. And do so perfectly. Therefore, I need to study this tromboner of yours in great detail.”

I groaned when his warm hand rubbed me through the trousers. “You already play me like a fiddle.” I felt him smile against my neck before he kissed me up along my hairline. 

“You do now that a trombone is a wind instrument right?”

His incessant caresses made it hard to think. Of course I knew what a trombone was, I just didn’t see where he was going with this. I somehow managed to pant out a _yes?_ Somewhere in-between my moans. 

His lips brushed up against my ear. “Good.” Then Erik fingers nimbly unbuttoned my trousers and pulled them down along with my undergarment. The feeling of skin against skin as his hand closed around me was unimaginable. I couldn’t remember ever being so turned on. My groan was captured by his mouth as he kissed me thoroughly. 

He then went down on his knees before me and licked his lips. Then I got what he meant with wind instrument. They need to be blown.

My cock was already leaking at the top and the mere sight of Erik looking up at me about to blow me away was enough to bring me to the edge. I realised I wasn’t going to last long. His tongue grazed the head of my length and he licked up the shiny pearl that had formed at the top. 

“God. Erik!” He kissed up along one side of me and down along the other. It was a wonderful kind of torture. I had to ball my hands into fists to keep them from grasping his hair to easier thrust into that glorious mouth over and over. “In not going to last long.”

Erik tssked at me. “And I have barley even started yet. We’ve got to work on your endurance.”

I was just about to tell him that he was free to work on me all he liked when he took me into his mouth and sucked me in deep. He had barely rocked back and fourth a handful of times when I felt my balls tightening. “Erik… I’m about to…”I didn’t finish the sentence, but Erik's answer assured me that I didn’t need to.

“Then come for me Raoul. Give me my reward!” His mouth closed over my cock again and as he sunk down I fell over the edge. Wave after wave of intense pleasure flooded through me as I filled Erik's mouth with my cum. After the last pulse had come and gone I let my trembling fingers stroke the side of his face that wasn’t covered with the mask. My spent manhood slipped free from his lips and he stood up. He looked me deep into my eyes and swallowed _his reward_ , as he so eloquently put it. The sight of his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed was hot enough to leave me gaping. I stood there trembling, with my mouth open, my heart rushing and my legs ready to give out any second. I caught my breath somewhat and smirked at him.

“If that’s my punishment. Then I will never call you anything else, my wonderful Bertram!”


	15. Secrets and charmers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little angst coming up. But nothing you can't handle. ;) 
> 
> Thank you for comments and kudos! And if you find typos, please tell me. :)

* * *

So our relationship had progressed to the next level. I was thoroughly pleased both with that fact and… well… I was _thoroughly pleased_. Erik touched me whenever he got the chance. In the days following my homecoming I found myself pressed against various walls in his lair. Not that I minded in the least. Erik explored my body with his hands and his mouth lingering whenever he found places that made my breath hitch. As much as I enjoyed his explorations it was one sided. Every time I tried to caress him (even on top of perfectly safe places like his back or his arms) he would gather my hands in his and either hold them above my head or press them to my chest while playfully chiding me. 

The only time I was allowed to touch him was when we hugged or kissed. I preferred both in combo. The lack of other touches though gnawed at my patience. He always managed to distract me as I was trying to confront him when the situation actually occurred and therefore I decided upon another approach. 

I found him in the living room reading a book. I sat down in the chair opposite the couch he occupied. Any closer and I would have been within range of his arms and then distraction would have been inevitable. 

“Erik, there’s one thing that has been bugging me.”

“Only one? After the casts first interpretation of my script I have _decisively_ more than one thing bugging me.”

“I’m sure it will turn out great. My problem hasn’t got anything to do with your Opera.”

He looked up from his book, and at the sight of my serious expression he tensed and put his book away. As much as I wanted to kiss the tension from his clenched teeth I had to keep my urges under control until I got my answers. His gaze flickered uncertainly between my eyes and the ground.

“I see. Are you not… …satisfied?” His voice betrayed no emotion but his eyes spoke volumes of the fear of rejection. 

“No, no! I am very satisfied. In fact, satisfied feels like the understatement of the year.”

His shoulders dropped slightly in relief and a small smile tugged at the corner of his lips. 

“Then, is this _problem_ of yours something I can help you with?” The gleam in his eyes was unmistakable. 

“It is. Though not in the way you’re currently thinking of.” I smirked but it didn’t quite reach my eyes. “I fear you’ve been neglected. I am satisfied, but you are not. Why wont you let me please you as you please me? Your occasionally tented trousers tells me I’m not the only one with urges.”

“Raoul,” he let out a deep sigh. “I assure you that I am completely content with this. I don’t feel neglected at all. You needn’t worry about me. Simply _letting me touch you_ is the greatest gift I’ve ever received. I thank God every day for your presence, and I’m not a very religious man.”

“Yes, but if you just…” The clock interrupted me with it’s chiming, letting us know that it was already midday. 

Erik stood up with his eyes on the clock. 

“Rehearsal’s about to start. I should be there. By the way Raoul, have you planned anything for Christine tonight? She was very apprehensive after yesterdays lesson, speaking nonstop about your _special surprise_ and the chorus girls’ long faces.”

_Damnation! Christine and our feigned courting has been the last thing on my mind._

I groaned and put my head in my hands. 

Erik snorted. “I’ll take that as a no. Don’t worry. I’ll help figure something out once I get back from practice.” A quick peck and he was gone.

* * *

 

“Raoul! Will you help me with this?” I stopped playing the piano and went over to the path from where I’d heard Erik. His had his arms full of stuff. There was a blanket, wine, parchment, a quill, cheese, grapes and a bouquet of red roses. I hurried to relieve him of some of the burdens. 

“What’s all this?” 

“Props for your special night with Christine. You’ll take her to a romantic picnic on the rooftop. It will be a clear night so you should have a good view over Paris.”

“That’s absolutely perfect! Thank you Erik!”

“Don’t mention it. Now was that you playing the piano I heard upon entering?”

I had learned the basics in music when I was younger. I knew how to play a few songs on the piano, one on the violin and three chords on the guitar. I’d never told Erik this however. It seemed sacrilegious to play my simple melodies to a musical genius. Therefore I’d only touched his instruments when he wasn’t home and even then I did it with the utmost care. I wasn’t sure how he’d react to me taking liberties with his instruments. They seemed almost more personal to him than his body, and he didn’t let me touch that…

He didn’t seem angry now though. He seemed curious. But I still kept my guard up. Better safe than sorry. 

“Hrm… well yes. I probably should have asked you first. Sorry about that.”

“Not at all. All mine is yours. It delights me to know that you play as well.” He placed the picnic props at the table and carried the parchment and the quill into his study. They seemed to be the comments about the rehearsal that he was going to give to the managers. “I would love to hear you play Raoul.”

“Oh no! No. Trust me, you really wouldn’t.”

He looked up at me and curiously tilted his head to the side.

“How so?”

“My repertoire consists of two songs in total. That’s it. I can’t play the piano like you do.” I shuffled my feet and scratched my neck, already looking for a way to change the subject. 

“So what? Play me the songs you know then. Everyone plays instruments differently. How they play reflects parts of their personality so it’s no surprise that you don’t play it like I would have.”

_‘Reflects part of their personality?’ Was that supposed to make me less nervous? If he were to analyse my playing he would come to the conclusion that I was simple minded, unorganized and fumbling or worse…_

“No Erik. See, you seem to be under the impression that I actually know what I’m doing with my fingers on the keys.” I imagined two different outcomes to the scenario. Either Erik would cover his ears with his hands and leave the room and never speak of this ever again. Or the more likely outcome: Erik would smile politely and try not to cringe every time I missed a note. I didn’t want to risk Erik seeing me differently after this. Different in this case could only be for the worse. 

He smiled and closed in on me. “Are you nervous Raoul?” His hand caressed the side of my face down to my chin. “I’ll try to not go all _picky opera ghost_ on you.” He winked at me.

I shuffled my feet once again. “It’s okay. I’d prefer your wrath to your pity.” 

His hand stilled as he got my drift. “Why would I feel sorry for you? You’re here as a patron and not as a musician. I don’t expect you to play as one.”

“But I’m also here as your partner. And you happen to be a musical mastermind. When famous musicians like Monsieur Reyer can’t impress you, then what chance do I have?” A sigh escaped me. “I would only let you down. Trust me, it’s better if you pretend like you never heard me in the first place.” I tore my gaze away from his before his sad eyes made me do something I would later regret. I took a few steps away to clear my head and turned to inspect the food for the picnic. “I should probably step by Christine and let her know of the plans this evening.”

I tried to keep my voice even and free of emotion but it was hard when I could feel his eyes on me.

“You impress me every day Raoul. You’re charming, caring, and have a sharp tongue. You have so many talents that I could only dream of gaining. Though I guess your bravery impresses me the most. You were brave enough to venture down into these black depths and get to know the monster within. Your bravery lets you open your heart to the impossible and embrace the imperfect. I look up to you in more aspects than I care to admit. I know it’s petty, but I can’t help but like the fact that there’s something that I know better than you. I’ve had no lessons in archery, no chef to teach me cooking and God knows I’m no charmer. But I do know how to play the piano. So would you do me the honour of letting me teach you?”

He took a few steps forward and took my hand in his. I couldn’t fight a smile.

“Fine. But I have to disagree with your God, because you Monsieur are the very definition of a charmer.”


	16. Bravery and fifty-four chimneys

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again. Thank you for staying with me, for the kudos, for the comments and for finding typos! :D

* * *

_Why did I agree to do this?_

After rushing past Christine and letting her know of the plans later that evening I found myself once again behind Erik's piano. I carefully placed my hands on the keys but my fingers wouldn’t move. I took a breath and was just about to tell Erik for the thirteenth time this evening that he wasn’t going to enjoy this when he forestalled me.

“It will be fine Raoul. No matter how bad you play I’ll still be here to kiss you tomorrow.” He stood behind me, his hands massaging my shoulders. He kissed the top of my head and whispered: “You won’t get rid of me that easily.”

I snorted, braced myself and played. Two minutes and a few minor mistakes later and it was over. My heart was beating a million times a minute, my fingers were cold as ice and I was shaking. But I made it. I made it through the song and the world hadn’t collapsed. Erik's hands at my shoulders and the heat that radiated from his palms were the only things that kept me going throughout the composition. I held my breath as he now lifted those very palms off of me. Then I heard the unmistakable sound of a one man applause. 

*clap clap clap clap*

I snorted and shook my head but a smile somehow managed to graze my lips anyway. He placed one hand on my shoulder again and squeezed. 

“See now, that wasn’t so bad!”

“Are you kidding me?” I turned around and placed my cold, shaking hands in his. “I can’t remember ever being that nervous.” He warmed my hands in his.

“You did great. And I must admit that it is strangely arousing to see you caress those keys. Though I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that I find it intriguing to hear my partner play. I use music as a way to express my feelings, and hearing you take your first stumbling steps into my world fills my heart with overwhelming joy.”

“I tried to be brave. For you.”

He smiled and gave me a long lingering kiss. When we broke apart he nudged me and told be to scoot over. The piano stool was barely big enough for both of us but we managed somehow.  
“Play it again.” He smiled at me and placed his hands on the keys in front of him. I was about to refuse when I saw how his eyes shone with joy. My heart pumped faster and I found myself nodding. Anything to keep that smile on his face. 

A deep breath and we were off. The tunes Erik played fit perfectly into mine. I’d never heard the song played like that. When I stumbled on the notes he was there to catch me, perfectly attuned to my pace. When the final note was played I found myself grinning like a fool. I turned to look at Erik and found the expression mirrored in his face. Even with the red marred face peeking out from under the edges of the mask he was absolutely gorgeous. The sight of his merriment filled me with pride and excitement. 

“You’ve heard that before!” It wasn’t a question. More like a playful accusation. I wanted to see that playful smirk of his as he boasted about knowing what piece I was playing after hearing the very first note. But he surprised me yet again.

“Well you played it to me barely five minutes ago.” He let his fingertips trace my jawline. I shuddered.

“Was that the very first time you heard it?” I asked in astonishment. He nodded and I felt his gaze shift from my eyes to my lips. I longed for that kiss as well but I had to compliment him first. Such remarkable skill should never go uncommented.

“You are amazing.”

His smile got even wider and he closed the last distance between us. 

_Soft lips. Warm breath. Happiness. Erik._

* * *

“So how do you like the life as a primadonna?” I stretched my arms above my head and looked out over the beautiful city that was Paris. Erik had been right. The scenery was romantic with the low setting sun making everything seem to shine with an ethereal glow. Even if Christine was great company I found myself missing _his_ presence. 

“Oh it’s incredible Raoul! The feeling I get when I stand on the stage is one of pure bliss. I’m lightheaded and focused on the same time. I love the audience so fiercely that I sometimes fear I might burst.” She waved her arms in a dramatic fashion and I chuckled at her antics. 

Christine was a sweet girl who had grown a lot in the role as a primadonna. Her confidence and radiance on stage could be seen from every seat in the great hall and filled the room with a feeling of serenity.

We talked about the Opera and then of the view. I had to bite my tongue on numerous occasions to avoid mentioning Erik. Saying things like “Oh, Erik would have loved this combo with cheese and grapes. He’s so fond of grapes.” or “Erik told me that the Opera was built in…” or “Did you know that Erik counted all the chimneys that can be seen from this roof. He says it’s fifty-four but I can only see forty-nine. I told him that and he said it was quite a few years since he counted them, but then I few days later he came down and smiled that infuriating sideways smile, kissed me and whispered: _Fifty-four_.”

I smiled at the memory. And decided to count the chimneys for the umpteenth time that evening while casually conversing Christine. 

_I may be five chimneys down but I’ll be damned if I let that affect my conversational skills._

* * *

“So, how did it go?” Erik asked me as I came home later that evening. 

*Hrmpf* “Not good. I found two more but only that makes it fifty-one. Are you _sure_ you haven’t counted some of them twice?”

Erik tried to muffle his laughter by hiding his face in his hands but I would have none of that. 

“Hey, stop that.” I pulled his hands from his face. “Seeing you smile and laugh is one of my greatest pleasures. Don’t take that away from me.”

“Will you ever stop surprising me Raoul? How much time did you spend counting chimneys?” I shrugged and he _tskd_ at me shaking his head. 

I raised his hand and placed my palm against his. 

“Thank you for helping me with the surprise. I know Christine appreciated it.”

“And did you?”

“I did. But I liked it even better when we played the piano you and I.” He smiled and laced his fingers with mine. 

“I did too. You’re talented Raoul, even if you don’t see yourself that way.” It was my turn to smile. I used our connected hands to pull him closer. 

“I may not have the most impressive piano skills but if you would let me I’ll show you just how nimble my fingers can be.” I let my voice drop to the suggestive purr that I knew he liked. My other hand slid up along his waist while I waited for his compliance.

I didn’t get the reaction I was going for. He froze and then exhaled. His smile slowly died and I saw a glimmer of sadness in his eyes. I frowned and was just about to ask him what’s wrong when he cut me off.

“I don’t want to disappoint you. Or drive you away for that matter. Trust me when I say that you’re better off not knowing what’s beneath these clothes. _We’re_ better off.” He gave me the softest peck on the mouth. “But if you’re up for it, I’m always willing to please.” As much as my cock hardened at his words I would have none of it.

“Then please me by giving me some of your trust. I won’t run Erik. And I _won’t_ be disappointed. I know it’s beyond scary to let your guard down, but I can’t put into words how much your trust would mean to me.”

He searched my eyes, but when he found only sincerity he gave in. 

“Then I guess it’s my time to be brave.”


	17. Scars and trust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't want to leave you hanging at the end of this chapter. So I wrote two and will publish both of them!
> 
> Again, thank you for the lovely comments! :D They make me so happy ^

* * *

Erik changed his mind five times before we even reached his bedroom. Each time I calmed him down with kisses and reassurances. 

I sat on his bed and gave him a supportive smile as he hanged his suit jacket over a nearby chair. 

“Before we start there are some things I need to tell you.” His poise was stoic but the fear in his eyes was evident. “I will not hold it against you if you feel the need to exit the room. Or cringe or shy away. I have complete understanding if you change your mind, and if you still wish to continue this relationship after… this, then you don’t ever have to feel compelled to please me. I assure you that I don’t feel neglected in any way. Your kisses are far more then I could ever have hoped for.” He took a deep breath and continued. “But I want you to be honest with me. If you don’t want to touch me then don’t do it. I don’t want you to feel obliged to do something to me just because I’ve done it to you or because you pity me. That would hurt so much more than keeping your hands to yourself or simply telling me no.”

My heart was breaking at his words. He sounded so convinced that I would hate his appearance just as much as he did. He seemed sad and resigned. Like he was a man about to be hanged, reconciled with the thought of imminent death. 

Afraid that my voice would break if I spoke I simply nodded. He didn’t need to hear my voice break. I was going to be strong and assertive. And I was to do my very best to show him just how much he meant to me.

He started at the sleeves. Unbuttoning slowly. 

“As you might have guessed, I haven’t always lived under the Opera. But even if this home may seem dark and damp it’s the brightest part of my life.” He started unbuttoning his shirt next. “I was born with a face unlike the world had ever seen, and my mother hated the very sight of me. My father was kind though. He taught me to read and write at en early age. He supported me and loved me as only a parent can. And he introduced me to music.”

I smiled to encourage him. “He seems like a good man.”

“He was. He died in a fever when I was still very young. And then my mother… sold me to a group of traveling gypsies. They put me in a cage and used me as the main event in a freak show. People would pay to come see my face. When I refused to show my face or tried to hide away they would beat me up. Some of the beatings left scars.” He turned his back to me and let the shirt fall off of him.

His back was covered in scars. Red lines in different lengths that together made up a web of fear and pain. My veins bubbled with a fury unlike ever before. 

“How could they do such a thing to a child? To anyone?” I was on my feet before I knew it. I didn’t know what to do with the consuming anger in me. 

Erik turned around and shrugged while he shook his head. His chest wasn’t as badly hurt as his back but there were still some angry red lines across his lean figure. Then I noticed the chain around his neck. He still wore my signet sing as a pendant. I couldn’t help but feel proud that he wore a part of me with him at all times. 

“One day, a group of ballet girls came to see me. Right here in Paris. One of them stayed behind when the show was over. She didn’t taunt me like the rest of them. Her heart held compassion even for a monster. Antionette Giry helped me escape that day. She unlocked my cage and I strangled my jailer. A decade on this earth and I was already a killer.”

I snorted. “He got off easy. I would have liked to get my hands on him and…” Erik's hand on my arm cut me off.

“Don’t.” The tiniest of smiles was tugging at the corner of his lips. “That was decades ago. Anger doesn’t change anything. I learned that long ago.” 

I let out a deep breath and took a small step forward. The need to touch him was almost overwhelming but I wanted to hear the rest of his story. 

“And then what happened?”

“She smuggled me into the Opera. She knew about the underground lake and helped me get a life down here. She snuck me food whenever she got the chance and spent endless nights talking to me, teaching me about anything and everything. She gave me my very first mask.”

I couldn’t keep my hands to myself any longer. I placed my right hand on his left shoulder careful not to startle him. His breath hitched, but he held my gaze. I let my hand slide down his pectoral, his nipple teasing my palm. His hand stopped mine right on top of his wildly beating heart. 

“It’s yours.” He whispered. I smiled and took his right hand in my left one. I led his hand to my heart and returned the gesture. 

“And this is yours. No matter how many scars you have. Thank you for telling me.” He nodded and I could see the tears building in his eyes. I closed my arms around him and hugged him tighter than I’ve ever hugged anyone before. I let my fingers fan out, trying to cover as much of him as possible. His body shook with silent sobs and he hid his face where my neck met my shoulder. My hands went up and down his back proving to him over and over that I was not repulsed by the sight of his scars. Eventually his breathing calmed. I wanted to see his face but I didn’t want to be the first one to pull away from the embrace. 

I didn’t have to wait long though before Erik excused himself and went to his wardrobe looking for a napkin. 

“Would… you mind turning around for a moment?” Ah, he was going to take his mask off and wasn’t ready to show me that just yet. Well I could wait. One step at the time. This night had been a huge breakthrough already. I didn’t want to push my luck. 

“Of course.” I turned around while he dried his tears and blew his nose. 

When he came to stand in front of me (mask in place) I slipped my hands around his waist and pulled him closer. 

“Are you all right?” 

“Yes. Thank you. That went far better than expected.” We shared a smile and then a soft kiss. My hands dropped down to grab his ass. 

“I hope to exceed your expectations by far.” My intonation left no uncertainty of my intentions. He groaned and his hands started working on the buttons of my shirt. 

“Well you’re doing a great job so far.” My hands squeezed his butt once again and I pressed our hips together. We both let out groans of pleasure as our lengths rubbed against each other. His hands sneaked in under my shirt and caressed my chest. 

“Mmm… Please Raoul. Let me show you my gratitude. Let me please you all through the night.” He kissed me up along my neck making my hair stand on end. He licked along the shell of my ear and I moaned his name pulling him even tighter against me. 

“Let me roll my tongue around that thick cockhead of yours. Let me take your pulsing length deep into my mouth and suck you hard. I love to feel you thrusting into my mouth almost as much as I love to push you over the edge and feel the proof of your pleasure coating me tongue.” 

It was damn near impossible to remember that this was supposed to be about him when he said such sinfully tempting things in my ear. His hand stroked up along the length of me through my pants. My head fell back and I let out a long moan. I moved back and lied down on his bed, my arms spread wide. 

“You may do whatever you want with me. I’m yours.”


	18. Practice makes perfect

Erik wasted no time undressing me. Before I knew it I lay naked before him my cock at rigid attention. Erik looked at me like he was about to devour me. My hard column twitched at his attention. Luckily his bed was big enough for both of us. I was about to ask him how he managed to bring such a big furniture down there, but my question would have to wait for later. Much later if the look in Erik's eyes was any indication.

“You are sheer perfection.” He let his hands wonder from the tip of my toes and up along my legs. Caressing, massaging, teasing. His palm brushed quickly past my member before continuing up my stomach. My muscles flexed under his ministrations. 

“Sweet Mary and all that is holy! We’ve barely started and I’m ready to go off like the crescendo at the end of act two.” I groaned while he let his hand make yet another brief pass over my sex.

“Stay with me Raoul. There are three acts in my most recent Opera. It would be a blasphemy to cut it shorter.” He crawled up beside me and whispered in my ear: “And I intend to enjoy every second of it.”

I grabbed his shoulder and pulled him on top of me. The feeling of his chest against mine was marvellous. He must have thought so too because a groan rumbled from deep within his chest. Even if I hadn’t muffled the sound of it with a thorough kiss I would still have felt the vibrations. My hands explored every inch of his back while his massaged my shoulders. I brushed my fingertips up along his spine and he broke the kiss to gasp for air. He dug his face down in the pillow next to my face and panted in my ear.

“Again. Do that again.”

“What’s the magic word?” I couldn’t help but tease him even if my fingers itched to please the man in my arms. I turned my head and sucked his earlobe into my mouth. 

“Oh, Raoul!”

I chuckled. “I was going for _please_ , but I guess that works as well.” He was just about to retort when I brushed my fingers along his spine again and whatever comment he was going for was exchanged for a _Mmmmm_. He started kissing down my chest, tasting me with the tip of his tongue, caressing me, worshiping me until I felt like a God. 

I caught his gaze just as he licked my nipple. I couldn’t help the involuntary gasp that escaped me. 

“Do you like that Raoul?” His eyes told me I was at his mercy and we both knew it. I nodded, unable to do anything else. He smiled and licked me again, slower this time. My chest lifted from the bed as every part of me wished to be closer. He chuckled. 

“Eager are we? Well I was told I could do whatever I wanted with you, so just lie still and let me please you.” He blew on my nipple before sucking it hard into his mouth, scraping it with his teeth. I bit my knuckle to keep from screaming out loud. I couldn’t remember ever being that hard. I wondered if it was possible to come without even touching my penis. I didn’t think so but if anyone was going to prove me wrong it would be Erik. 

He pulled the hand away from my mouth and frowned, his thumb caressing the bite marks. “Don’t do that. Hearing you is one of _my_ greatest pleasures. Besides,” he glanced at my hand again, ”you’re biting my property.” 

“Yes. I’m yours.” I pulled him down to kiss him again. Sliding my tongue along his made us both shudder. I drew his lower lip into my mouth and tugged on it with my teeth. Oh, how he liked it!

“Aaahh, you are one wicked Vicomte! Distracting me from my quest of pleasing you.”

I was just about to tell him that everything he did was pleasing when he took a firm grasp around my member. My mind seemed to melt while other parts of me became increasingly harder. His hand started pumping and I realised just how close I was to coming. 

“Erik. If you keep that up… Too late I’m…” 

Erik's hand stilled in an instant. I was so close. So impossibly close. At that point I was certain it wouldn’t take more than shift in the air to bring me over the edge. Erik must have seen the shock in my eyes because he chuckled and gave me an explanation. 

“I want to suck you dry.”

I swallowed loudly to keep from coming at the very sound of his words. His gaze followed my Adam’s apple. 

“Indeed. I intend to swallow your cum just like that.” My eyes became pleading and he finally took pity on me. Gracefully he edged down on the bed and quickly enclosed my cock in his hot mouth. He had barely started sucking on the head before I felt the familiar tightening in my balls. I intended to tell him that it felt wonderful, that I’d never experienced anything like his mouth before, and that I intended to repay him the favour many times over if he’d only let me, but all I could manage was to shout out his name. Repeatedly. My whole body convulsed as I reached a shattering orgasm with his name on my lips and his lips on my cock. 

True to his word Erik swallowed all of it. He then crawled up beside me and looked at me with the widest of grins. I laid there panting for quite some time, just looking into his eyes that seemed to dance with joy and lust. I lifted my hand and placed it on his bare cheek. 

“Thank you. That was mind-blowing.”

“Don’t you mean cock-blowing? And I should be the one doing the thanking. I still can’t believe that you stayed with me after…” He trailed off and I frowned. 

“Of course I would. And I’ll do more than that. If you’ll let me that is. I might not have your talent with wind instruments, but I’m willing to learn.” He tilted his head to kiss the palm of my hand.

“You know that you don’t have to?”

“I know. I want this Erik. You’ll have to guide me though. Promise to tell me if I do anything wrong. I want you to experience the same bliss that you just gave me.”

A deep breath and he nodded. Lying down on his back he unbuttoned his pants and pulled them off. I kissed him just below his ear and whispered:  
“My turn.” He shuddered. 

I took my time exploring his body. I mimicked his earlier actions of kissing, licking and blowing on his nipples. He was breathing hard and looked at me with a surprising amount of awe. 

_Had he never been loved before?_

I brushed the thought away thinking it couldn’t be the case since he was the master of blowjobs. But blowjobs didn’t have to include others touching him. His reluctance to take off his shirt hinted at me being the first one to see him like this. I felt proud and privileged at the thought. 

I brushed my fingers up along his length and his eyes rolled back in his head. A small bead of precum had gathered at the tip of his long column. I licked up along the length of his cock. I took the hissing noise coming from him as appreciation so I continued and tried to remember how Erik used to suck me. 

_He did some swirling with his tongue. *Loud groan* Ah, yes that seemed to have done the trick._

I sucked him into my mouth trying to take as much of him in as possible. I covered the last part with my hand. I went up and down and tried to increase the sucking without scraping him with my teeth. I looked up to see Erik's eyes squeezed shut. He was frowning and biting his lip. I quickly detangled myself.

“Did I hurt you? Why didn’t you tell me? What did I do wrong?”

Yellow eyes met mine as his eyebrows rose in confusion.

“No! No. It was perfect. I just realised that I never should have teased you about endurance…” He gave me a guilty smile. Relieved, I got back to work. I didn’t have to work long before Erik emptied himself inside me. I tried to catch all of it but some dribbled down to my chin. Erik used his thumb to brush it off. 

“You’ve got something there.”

“Hey, that’s mine!” 

I caught his hand before he could pull it back and sucked his thumb into my mouth.

Erik mmmmed happily. I too was beyond happy. 

“I’m quite proud of the outcome. Except for that last dribble. But you know what they say; Practice makes perfect.” I winked at him and his smile widened.


	19. Sweet dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again. Thank you for comments and kudos! If any of you prefer to read in Russian then heres a link:  
> https://ficbook.net/readfic/4694870  
> The wonderful fan Tsozya has translated part of the story into Russian! How cool is that? XD

* * *

I was warm. Under the cover, my limbs entangled with Erik's in intricate ways I was warm. We were simply holding each other close, enjoying the others presence. Sometimes I let my hand travel along his body to explore the landscape of his fine muscles. My hand reached his butt and I squeezed it while simultaneously pulling him closer. The smile that hadn’t left his lips since our lovemaking widened. 

“I still can’t believe any of this.” I felt his breath against my face as he spoke. Impossible not to, considering the lack of space between us. 

“Thank you for trusting me with this.” My hand glided up along his back. Even if I hadn’t intended the gesture to be sensual I felt the hairs on his arms and legs stand on end. 

_Right. Soft touches along his spine was one of his special zones._

I added the thought to my growing mental list over places Erik liked to be touched. 

I was tired but I didn’t want to take sleeping next to him for granted. Sex, passion and closeness was one thing. Sleeping next to someone, succumbing to unconsciousness in another persons immediate presence is something else entirely. Besides, I was certain that he slept without his mask, giving his face some sort of reprieve. He didn’t need to take it off tonight. We’d made enough emotional progress. He could take it off whenever he was ready. It didn’t bother me that I only knew half of my lovers face. The white mask had become a part of him to the point where I saw past the mask to the man underneath. Of course, a part of me was curious. But he needed time and my curiosity was a small price to pay for Erik's trust. He would show me eventually. And even if he didn’t I was certain I could find a way to live with that as well.

I yawned. “I should probably get ready for bed. I’ll see you in the morning.” What was supposed to be a quick peck on his lips turned out to be a long sensual kiss since neither of us had the restraint to break apart. 

“Will you sleep on the sofa? You’re welcome to stay here in bed if you like.” Erik's half lidded eyes were hopeful before they widened and he quickly added: “Unless you prefer to sleep on the sofa. I didn’t mean to sound presumptuous.” 

“I like your presumptions.” I smiled at him and felt him relax once again. “But I figured you might want to take off your mask during the night. I like the thought of sleeping next to you but I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“I guess I can sleep with the mask on… But I can’t guarantee that it won’t come off during the night, so we should probably sleep separately. I’m sorry. But you can have the bed if you like! I can take the couch.”

“No! Don’t! I won’t drive you from your own bed.”

“I assure you it’s no trouble Raoul. It’s the least I can give you.”

“Erik. What we just shared wasn’t one sided. I got just as much out of this as you did. You don’t owe me anything.”

He took a deep breath and then let it out slowly. “Fine.” He complied but something in his eyes told me that he didn’t really believe me. I figured the only way to prove him wrong would be to make sure I always repaid him his actions in kind. “But if there’s anything I can do to make you happy…”

“ _Happier_.” I corrected him. He replied with a series of small pecks on my chin.

“ _Happier_. Then will you tell me? You see, I seem to have gotten addicted to having a content Raoul by my side.”

“Only if you promise to do me the same favour. I’ll help you gain my favour if you help me gain yours.”

“You drive a hard bargain Monsieur le Vicomte, however I guess I can agree to that.” He winked at me. I stood up to stretch knowing that I’d fall asleep in his bed whether I wanted to or not if I stayed there another minute. Erik sighed and sat up in the bed, the cover pooling around his hips. 

“Goodnight. Sweet dreams.”

“Goodnight Erik.” I turned to him before I left. “Just so you know; I find you very handsome. I love the feel of your long lean body, your hard muscles and your soft skin. You are beyond doubt the sexiest man I’ve met. I cannot believe how you would ever think I’d be disappointed. You are as pleasing to the eye as you are to the mind. Don’t ever forget that. And if you do: Let me be the first one to know so I can rectify it right away. Sleep well Erik.” 

With that I left the room. The last thing I saw was Erik's mouth hanging agape. 

Well if he didn’t believe me, I’d just have to tell him over and over again. Starting tomorrow.

* * *

I woke up to the smell of pancakes coming from the kitchen. My stomach growled. I rolled out of the sofa and headed for the bathroom. 

_What time was it? Too early. I could easily sleep for a few more hours._

The feast that greeted me in the small kitchen had me stumped. There was omelette, sliced fruit, tea, boiled beats, and a tall stack of pancakes. 

_How long had he been up? It must have taken forever to make all this._

He used the wooden spatula to flip yet another pancake his back turned to me. I walked up behind him and he greeted me as I slid my arms around his waist. He was a tall man, but I wasn’t far behind. Not more than perhaps two inches in height difference.

“I hope I didn’t wake you.”

“Not at all.” I kissed the side of his neck. “That smells amazing. How long have you been up?”

“I hope you’re hungry. I… couldn’t sleep really. Or well… I slept a few hours but then I woke up when a nagging thought wouldn’t leave my mind. I figured I might as well get up and do something useful.”

“What thought?”

He lifted the last pancake and placed in on a plate nearby. Then he turned around in my arms. Our close proximity made it necessary to share the very same air for breathing. I didn’t mind. He tilted his forehead to mine and his lips gave away a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“If last night happened or if it was just another figment of my imagination. Just another dream.”

My turn to smile. A real one that is. 

“Is that so? Then I would like a recap of said dreams please. In great detail if you wouldn’t mind. But since last night _did_ happen I might just ask you not only to tell me but to show me too.”

Finally the smile reached his eyes. “You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into Monsieur le Vicomte.”

The look of his yellow eyes shining just a short distance away made my breath hitch. What I wouldn’t have given to know his thoughts! He seemed to be planning wonderfully devious things in which I had the leading part. 

My stomach chose that moment to make it’s presence known, loudly complaining about it’s hollow emptiness. Erik chuckled.

“First things first though. Let’s get you filled up.”

I only needed to raise an eyebrow for him to see the double meaning in his words. 

“I mean… your mouth and not… No! With things you can actually swallow.... No! Just… eat would you?” Erik was really flustered and I was having the time of my life. I scanned the table looking for some kind of sausage, planning to play with Erik just a little more, but the lack of sausages made me put that idea away for later. 

“Fine. If you promise to fill me up in other ways later on.” A quick peck on his lips and I sat down to dig in. Erik soon followed. 

“Oh I plan to, Raoul. If we are to re-enact my dreams we have _more than just an hour to fill_.”


	20. Executing surprises

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I'm down, I read all the comments once again. You guys make me happy! x)
> 
> And also; Can you find the line from "Learn to be lonely" by Minnie Driver (that's in the end titels in the movie) that I've weaved into this chapter?

* * *

Trying to surprise Erik was easier said than done. He constantly surprised me with extravagant breakfasts and thoughtful compliments. Not to mention that his passionate opera that showed his feelings for me was possibly the most romantic gesture I’d ever heard of. 

Therefore I was dead set to surprise him. To swipe him off his feet. To blow his mind and not just his… well… you catch my drift. 

I had been wondering about the streets of Paris for the more part of the day looking for something for Erik. It had to be personal. Something he would like. I was just about to give up when I bumped into one of the musicians from the Opera. We exchanged pleasantries and small talked for a while. He was going to the only instrument shop in Paris (he had to restring his violin) and I decided to accompany him. I entered the shop and instantly saw my would be present.

_Perfect!_

* * *

It didn’t take me more then half an hour to change my opinion. “Perfect” was relative. Don’t get me wrong, it was a great present in the aspect of how much Erik would appreciate it, but the size of it was proving to be a bigger problem than I anticipated. 

I had found (and bought) a double bass. It was one of the few instruments that Erik didn’t have down below the Opera. And I, being his wonderful partner and patron of the establishment, was going to rectify that. 

_But why did the bloody thing have to be so huge?_

After a half hearted attempt at squeezing the huge bass through the secret door in my office I went out to look for other paths down to Erik. I had to find a path that was big enough for both me and the large instrument. Luckily no one raised an eye when I walked by with the double bass. Nothing could be more inconspicuous than an instrument among musicians. 

I leaned the instrument against a wall while stretching my arms. That thing was heavy! I head the rehearsal from stage and knew Erik would probably be in box five, overlooking the rehearsal and writing down comments for the managers. I hadn’t seen him since this morning when we’d shared a long kiss before going our separate ways. Even if it was just eight hours ago I still missed him. 

_Besides I want to make sure he doesn’t interfere with my plans._

I told myself that while I made my way to his preferred vantage point. I started humming as I neared box five so he would hear that it was no one other than me. 

“Raoul. Welcome back. I hope your trip into town was successful? Did you find the spices you were looking for?” He didn’t tear his eyes away from the scene below but he the smile in his voice was enough. He sat in the shadows at the edge of the box so he could watch the proceedings below without making his presence known. I took a seat next to him.

“Thank you. It went fine. I got everything we need for the ratatouille tonight. It will be superb.”

The song ended. Erik scribbled a short comment and then turned to me. 

“I look forward to it.” He smiled. His eyes were appreciative and very attractive. Given the magnetism between us I couldn’t help giving him a quick kiss. 

“As do I. How long until they are finished?”

“Give it another hour and a half. Shall I pick you up in your office when I’m done here?”

 _An hour and a half… That should give me more than enough time to find a path and drag the surprise home before it’s new owner returned._

“No. I’ll go down and start cooking. It’ll take a while anyhow. I’ll see you in one and a half hour then.” I stole another kiss.

“Hmmm…” His eyes turned playful. “If you’ll go down to start off dinner preparations I’ll go down on you later tonight. What say you?”

I groaned. “Now _that_ I definitely look forward to.”

The next song started and Erik's attention was once again pulled to the performance on stage. I took it as my cue and left the box.

* * *

 

The path from behind the mirror in the divas dressing room was big enough for the double bass. Christine was practicing on stage as were all the other performers who generally occupied the corridor. Completely unnoticed I managed to sneak halfway home before trouble caught up with me. 

The route I would have normally taken (the one Erik had shown me weeks ago when I’d surprised Christine in her room after her debut) was too small for the double bass. There was a large opening to the left of the path. The paths re-joined again barely thirty feet ahead of me, but to get there I had to pass through a suspiciously large opening. It was bound to be booby-trapped, but I saw no other alternative. Putting down the bass at a safe distance I leaned into the opening with the torch without placing as much as a foot inside in case I would trigger something like last time. I threw rock into the room and when they bounced over the floor without any suspicious sound I decided to give it a try.

* * *

 

Well. _I_ made it to the other side. The double bass did not. As I carefully traded the opening in the cave, my arms full with the bass and the torch held away from my precious gift the trap decided to close in on us. Before I knew what happened a noose was wrapped around the neck of the bass and it was pulled out of my grasp. I caught it before it slammed against the wall, but it was very much stuck. At least the trap hadn’t done it’s work. It hadn’t broken the recipients neck. I could still salvage Erik's present.

* * *

 

Forty-five minutes later and I wasn’t so sure. I needed two hands to unwrap the noose, one hand to lift the bass and one hand to hold the torch. The two hands attached to my arms were sadly too few. 

“Raoul. Would you mind explaining what the poor double bass did to deserve this?”

_Erik! He shouldn’t be down for another half an hour. The rehearsal must have been finished ahead of time._

So much for romance. The sight looked more morbid than anything else. The slow spinning of the bass as it hung lifelessly from the noose seemed to work as a medieval threat to warn musicians not to enter. I glared at the offensive instrument, my scorn aimed at the rightful receiver. 

“I’m on a crusade against fat instruments. You should see what happened to the timpani.”

Erik chuckled as he walked over to me, lacing his fingers with mine. I could see his smile in the faint glow from my torch. He didn’t carry one since he always found his way in darkness. 

“Perhaps there is a phantom in you after all? Or I’ve rubbed off on you.”

A sigh left me. “It was supposed to be romantic…”

Erik stiffened next to me. “Romantic? Please don’t tell me that you’ve executed all my instruments in the name of love.”

 _Okay, now it was_ his _time to receive my glare._

It only resulted in him chuckling at my expense once again. The sound of his laughter made up for it though. I replied playfully: 

“Oh, you just wait and see till I get my hands on your organ.”

His grin turned from merry to cocky. 

“And here _I_ thought I was the one to get my hands on _your_ organ.” He cupped me through my pants and I stifled a groan. I pried his hand away with much reluctance. 

“Not now. Aren’t you hungry?”

“Well… as a matter of fact I am.” He bit his lip and winked at me. 

“Oh, you’ll most certainly be the death of me.”

Erik's expression sobered. “If you insist on taking dangerous routes home then there will be a far more literal death of you. Do you realise how close you came to be the one hanging from that lasso? Why didn’t you take the paths I showed you?”

“The double bass was too big!”

“So? Use the winch!”

“There’s a winch? Where?”

“In the Operas cellar. How did you think I got the organ down there? Or the furniture for that matter?”

“I was actually going to ask you about that.”

“Before or after you accidently killed yourself?”

“That was uncalled for. I was only trying to give you a gift!” I sighed. I had failed. What was supposed to be an evening where Erik came home to ratatouille and a thoughtful present turned out to be far different: A strangled bass in a damp cave, a heated argument, and no dinner. I still had to fetch the ingredients from my office. “You are a hard man to surprise.”

Erik sighed and lifted his hand to caress my cheek. “I’m sorry Raoul. I only lashed out because I was worried. Surely you must know that. I care too much to loose you. And thank you for the gift. Even if your company is the best gift I’ve ever gotten, this one comes in second.” A quick peck on the lips. “You did surprise me all right. This is probably the last sight I thought I’d see today.”

“At least I managed the surprise part then. I’ll have to show you romance some other way.”

We got the bass down safely and carried it home. After the late ratatouille dinner I showed Erik just how romantic I could be. Over and over again.


	21. Views and visages

“It was terrifying! The most gruesome face imaginable! I’m glad I am a god fearing man because it must have been due to divine intervention that I am still alive.”

The stage hand stood in the middle of a large group of people. Cast and musicians alike were all stunned by his incredible story. He had met the phantom earlier that day and he was still trembling. 

“That sounds horrific! We are all glad you are still with us. What were you doing among the rafters in the first place?” Madame Giry seemed more annoyed then worried. My initial explanation was that the stage hand was babbling away the time she had set aside for practice with the ballerinas, but then I remembered who took in Erik all those years ago. 

“I was retying the new background screens in the winches Madame. I had just started on the second rope when he attacked me. We fought but I was no match for the Phantom. I fell and in my attempt to stay upright I grasped the thing closest to me. It was his face! I ripped the bone away from his face Madame! And under it…” The man seemed to choke on air and crossed himself repeatedly. 

I turned once again to Monsieur Reyer in an attempt to get his attention to the task at hand. We were going through the manuscript and the note sheets to sort out any queries that had emerged. So far we’d only made it to the end of the first act. I cleared my throat but Monsieur Reyer was just as captivated as the rest of the crew. 

“Was it the face of the devil?” A chorus girl asked the main character. 

A snort escaped me. 

_‘Face of the devil’ Was she daft? He probably had some scorch marks under that mask but that could hardly qualify as horrible._

The man drew his arms tighter around himself and tried his best to describe the sight. “It was red and mottled. Half of his face was covered in huge boils. Bigger than anything I’ve ever seen. It was the face of a gargoyle. Perhaps there is some truth to the rumour that the Phantom is the illegitimate child of a gargoyle and one of the Operas patrons. God killed the patron for bringing such an abomination to this world. And the Phantom was condemned to haunt this Opera forever.” 

At that point, Madame Giry had had enough. She ushered the girls to their respective starting positions and assigned one man to help the shaking lad back stage where he could calm down. 

I finally got the attention I wanted from Monsieur Reyer. I tried to keep the discussion as short as possible, my impatience eating away at me. I needed to find Erik. 

I didn’t know where he was but I swore I could feel his eyes on me. Imagined or not, sometimes I could feel the longing in his gaze even from half way across the Opera. This wasn’t one of those times though. Was he nervous? Scared? Or was I simply projecting my own feelings onto him? I needed to make sure he was alright.

* * *

 

I found him in his bedroom, his back turned to me. The only confirmation of my arrival was my name on his lips. 

“Raoul.”

“I heard about what happened. Or well… one version of it. What did actually happen? Are you okay?”

His shoulders slumped as he exhaled. “I am now. How much did you hear?” He turned around and I noticed that he wasn’t wearing his regular white mask. He’d donned a black one that almost completely covered his face. His chin was the only part of him not hidden behind the black porcelain. I was just about to ask him if he’d lost the white mask in his run-in with the stage hand when I noticed it on the desk behind him. 

“Is it broken?” I gestured to the mask that seemed so out of place on his desktop. 

“No. But it was about time I exchanged it for a more all-covering alternative. How much did you hear of the mans story? Did he… describe my face?”

I took a few steps forward. With his eyes cast down and his face completely hidden behind the mask it was hard to discern his emotions. I hated the black mask already. It hid a part of Erik from me. A part that I had already claimed as mine. 

A dialogue is largely built upon body language and facial expressions. It’s the way to perceive how ones counterpart is reacting to the words being spoken as well as communicating ones opinions without actually having to voice them. By donning the black mask Erik had cut a part of himself off from me. He had deprived us of the use of facial expressions. At least from one side. But it was one side too many.

“He did. Would you mind using the white mask instead? If you insist on wearing a mask at all that is.” I knew he would insist, but I wanted him to know that he didn’t have to hide because of me. If he wanted to use a mask he could, but then he’d be doing it for his own sake. 

He let out a deep sigh and sat at the end of the bed, his face in his hands. “I’m sorry you had to hear that. I’m sorry that I didn’t have the courage to tell you myself. I wish there was someway I could…” he trailed off clenching his fists hard. “I cannot change my appearance no matter how hard I try. But I can hide it, to make it more bearable for you to look at me. Let me at least give you that reprieve.” 

A sting of pain radiated from my heart out into my very fingertips. 

_Hide? Bearable? Reprieve!?_

“You don’t give me enough credit Erik. You thought the scars would scare me away, they didn’t. You thought the whole ‘living-under-the-Opera-building-death-traps’ would send me running, but I’m still here. You’re two down Phantom, let me prove you wrong a third time around.” I went to crouch in front of him, gently prying his hands from his face. 

“No. Too much is at stake. I cannot risk it. After the accident I studied my face in the mirror, the white mask in place, and I noticed that some of my disfigurement could be seen from certain angles. You must have glimpsed part of the atrocious truth already.”

I nodded. “And I have yet to leave.”

“But what if you did?” he whispered. His yellow eyes finally met mine. They were full of pain and fear, but there was a glimpse of hope. He had an open mind. I placed my hand on his neck and traced the chain down until I found my ring under his shirt. 

“What does this ring represent Erik? Why did I give it to you in the first place?”

“A promise that you would come back.”

“Have you never asked yourself why I haven’t asked you to give it back?”

Tears formed in his eyes as he got the meaning behind my words. 

_I’ll always come back to you._

He grasped my hands in his. His eyes told me that hope was just a heartbeat away. 

“Why?”

“Because I love you Erik.”


	22. Lives irreversibly entwined

* * *

Erik's mouth was hanging agape and his eyes were wide in disbelief. He opened and closed his mouth several times without actually making any sound. 

It was not the epic love declaration I had hoped for. Not the decisive ‘I love you too’ or the passionate ‘Finally’ followed by an intense make out session. I hid my disappointment behind a resigned smile, gave him a peck on the back of his hand and told him:

“It’s okay. You don’t have to say it back. They’re big, meaningful words that shouldn’t be taken lightly. Take your time. That goes for the mask as well.” I rose to my full height. “But do use the white one please. You dress in enough black as it is.”

Erik's mouth was still mimicking that of a cod fish: open, closed, open, closed. But his eyes seemed a bit more frantic. 

Were they trying to tell me something or was I just getting my hopes up for nothing? 

I nodded at him and turned to leave. “I’ll start making dinner.”

“Raoul!” He stood up and grasped my elbow to turn me around. The position brought us very close. His amazing soul searching eyes that I could easily drown in stared into mine. He lifted his hand slowly and caressed my cheek. 

“Raoul, I…”

_Go on! Say it!_

He had my full focus. I’d longed for that moment for longer than I’d even admitted to myself. 

_Come on! Two more words. Please Erik, I know you can do it!_

After letting me wait for over an eternity he finally continued. 

“I think you deserve something better.”

This time I could not supress my disappointment. I quickly averted my gaze to hide the pain that my eyes would give away. 

_Why am I surprised? He clearly isn’t ready for this._

I had prodded for an affirmation he wasn’t up to. At least not yet. I knew that, so why did it still hurt? Why did I have to get my hopes up? He’d told me once that I had a hold of his heart so I’d assumed… Had he changed his mind? Or did the words hold another meaning for him than they did to me? 

I didn’t want to be angry and hurt. The pitied lover who couldn’t take any rejection no matter how small. But with every heartbeat pain spread through my veins like poison. I had to know. I clenched my teeth and braced myself. 

“A long time ago you told me that I had your heart. What changed?” I was too upset to be eloquent. I figured a straight forward approach would give me an honest answer. It seemed enough to shake him out of his reprieve. 

“Nothing! Or well… Many things have changed these past weeks but that is one thing that’s stable. I am yours in any way you want me! I may not have a…” He paused and then quickly went rummaging through his desk drawers. 

“What are you…”

“Don’t move! At least don’t go anywhere.” The desperate look in his eyes was back again. “I have it here somewhere.”

He found whatever he was looking for and was in front of me again in an instant. 

“Here.” He took my hand and pressed a ring in it. A golden ring with a black onyx on it. A signet ring. Even if it didn’t show off the symbol of any of the noble houses it was still very beautiful. Plain in it’s design with the large square black onyx. Erik closed my hand around the ring and used those golden eyes to look straight into my soul. He was pleading with me. Pleading with me to understand. 

“If you ever doubt my feelings for you, you only need to look down for conformation. Please take this ring as a proof of that. I will be by your side for as long as you want me. I love you Raoul. I have loved you for quite some time now. I just didn’t think that you… I know you cared about me but…” The words were failing him but he wasn’t giving up. “A wise man once told me that love is big and meaningful, and it shouldn’t be taken lightly.” 

Ironically I answered: “That wise man didn’t grasp the meaning behind the desperation in his partners eyes and almost stormed off, ending the evening on a bad note. Wise one indeed…”

“I’m sorry for letting you down. I never want to see you get hurt again. But I stand by my word. I still think you deserve better than me.”

“Would you let me be the judge of that?” I slid the ring on my finger and it fit me like a glove. Or perhaps… like a ring. “Erik.”

“Hmm?”

I held my up in front of him. “This ring represents your love and devotion right?”

“Yes?” He clearly wasn’t seeing were I was going with this. 

“Since we have now exchanged promise rings, does that mean we’re engaged?” 

We both burst out laughing at the thought. Men couldn’t get engaged! 

“Can you imagine the surprise if we ever asked a clerk to wed us.” I asked which sent us into another fit of laughter.

“We would burst into flames upon entering the church!”

“I do like you hot and heavy, but that’s a bit too literal.” 

“Indeed.” Erik kissed me. He at least tried to kiss me, but the black mask was not just covering more of his face, it was bulkier too which made kissing awkward and uncomfortable.

“Would you…”

“I’ll get the other one.”

I turned around to give his some privacy and then I remembered the reason I’d been so anxious to get down here in the first place. 

“What did actually happen this morning Erik? I’d like to believe you would keep those hands of yours solely on _me_.”

I heard him chuckle behind me. He slid his arms around me and pulled my back to his chest. His breath was warm in my ear. “Oh they are yours all right.” He kissed down my neck before he continued: “I had been doing some maintenance work on the rafters. There was some worn cords that needed replacement.”

“Isn’t that the stage hands jobs?”

He scoffed at me. “It is. But they keep doing it wrong. It would take forever to change the scenery in between the acts with the knots they tie.”

I turned around in his arms and gave him a deep kiss, now unhindered as my phantom was back to normal. Our tongues circled each other lazily. Then it was my turn to kiss down his neck. 

“Was that reason enough to fight the man?” 

“Fight? There was no fight. He was hunched over doing some other repairs. I didn’t see him until it was too late. When he saw me he recoiled so violently he was about to fall down unto the stage. A twenty feet drop would have done him no good. I had just enough time to pull the lad back before he fell. When I grabbed him he panicked, clawing at me like an angry cat. He managed to remove my mask in the process. I swore, gave him the usual threats, took my mask and disappeared.”

Amused I shook my head and smiled. “Why did you save him? Why not just let him drop down?”

“He’s a good lad. One of the few stage hands I actually like. And besides, I need to show myself every now and then to keep the myths about me alive.”

I found the perfect spot on his neck and sucked on it. “ _You actually like_ , should I be jealous?” I teased him and then got back to marking him with a hickey. 

Erik snorted. “The boy is half my age. I may be a killer and a blackmailing phantom, but I don’t go after kids!”

I finished the hickey off with a lick. “Good. Because I’m not sharing you with anyone.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you who want to read more of this kind of slice-of-life/romance fanfic. I can recommend a V for Vendetta fanfic by PEAhopeless. The language and the storytelling is absolutely amazing. She hasn't updated in like a decade, but it doesn't end with a cliffhanger so don't worry. :) I took a lot of inspiration from that story, the name for this chapter among many other things. 
> 
> Google it or follow the link below: 
> 
> https://sites.google.com/site/theveveyfanficbackups/Home/authors/peahopeless
> 
> And if you would please take a minute to comment it would truly make my night!


	23. Paper faces on parade

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the comment Lely! :D  
> Heh, I needed that reminder to remember to write/post. xP

* * *

_My god, he was handsome!_

The midnight blue suit with golden fringes fit him perfectly. The mask he’d donned for the event was also golden and it matched his eyes perfectly. Erik was straightening the dark blue jesters hat on top of his head at he studied himself in the mirror. 

“There. Now do I look presentable enough to be a guest in your house?”

We were going to the masquerade at the Chagny estate. Philippe wanted his proposal to Celine to be magnificent. He wanted in to be grand and spectacular and had therefore invited lots of nobles from the area to a grand feast. It was my idea to make it a masquerade. 

“Yes you do. You look absolutely perfect. The hardest part tonight will be keeping my hands to myself.”

“If you don’t, I know what the hardest part of me will be.” Erik smiled and turned to face me, seeing me for the first time in my costume. 

I was dressed as a colourful rooster. Where Erik's costume was modest and classy, mine was gaudy and all over the place. It was a great quality costume though and even if it could seem a bit much I still thought I looked fetching in it. The beak on the mask that covered the top half of my face and the red comb on my head were fine craftsmanship. The best part of the outfit was the plume of different coloured feathers in fabric that made up my tail-feathers. I spun around slowly.

“So, do you like what you see?”

“Always, but don’t you think it is a bit… garish?”

“Noep. I love it! Besides, I didn’t think you’d be the one to complain. I know you like big cocks.” 

He chuckled. “ Shouldn’t I be the one making the jokes tonight?”

“I can’t let you have all the fun.” I winked at him and then looked at my wristwatch, a new and expensive invention I’d imported from England. I intended to show it off at the party as much as possible tonight. You needed to have a few tricks up your sleeve to gain the approval of the French nobles. “We should get going. I cannot be late since I’m the co-host.”

* * *

Erik watched the view as we made our way through Paris in the carriage I’d hired. He looked stiff and unmoving, more like a part of the carriage décor than a passenger. 

When I first came to Erik with the idea to accompany me to the masquerade he’d been stunned. He had attended masquerades before but never outside of the Opera. He knew every nook of the Opera inside out, so if anything were to go wrong he could disappear in a heartbeat. He wouldn’t have that opportunity in the Chagny estate. Or just about any other building that wasn’t the Opera. He was a brave man though, and with some coaxing and the promise that I would stay by his side he agreed to come along. 

I took one of his hands in mine. It was stiff and cold. I hid our hands under my cloak and went on with my mission to warm him up. 

“Are you nervous?”

The statue of a man next to me moved his head in my direction and his eyes softened. 

“Very.”

I squeezed his hand. “If you find yourself in need of a reprieve from the crowd then take the stairs to the second floor. My room is the last one to the right. It shouldn’t be locked since the guests are only allowed on the first floor. If it is indeed locked, then the key hangs behind the painting to the left side of the door.”

Erik took a deep breath. Probably to calm his nerves. “Thank you. I’ll remember that.”

“And if you forget something about your persona, you just start mumbling musical terms and the guests will simply think your being an eccentric.”

Since Erik couldn’t very well stroll in like the phantom of the Opera Populaire we’d made up a persona for him. Tonight, he was George Chambon the composer from Sallaumines. Most of the French nobles had contacts in the south of France but the north was very much unknown territory so a small village outside of Lens seemed like a safe bet. I wasn’t worried. Erik was a well-spoken man and the nobles liked nothing better than to talk about themselves. A change of topics and he would be in the clear. 

* * *

A few hours into the reception and things were going smoothly. I had greeted and gossiped with most of the guests as was expected. After all the necessary introductions Erik dared to leave my side and mingle on his own. He was doing a marvellous job at blending in. He complimented the ladies on their beauty, spoke to the men about the newest inventions (he even managed to mention my new watch a couple of times to my great pleasure), and gossiped with _everyone_. He would hear a scandalous story from one person and retell that rumour to the next in exchange for more juicy rumours. And there were lots of rumours among the French nobles. Gossip was power since blackmail was far from uncommon. Gossip like: “Who slept with who?” “How many bastards did he have?” and “Why did he buy/sell that property?” could be used to form powerful alliances. 

I saw Erik make his way towards me and excused myself from Monsieur Lauté who was dressed up as a Viking. 

“I shall see if I can find yet another of those outstanding drinks. Always a pleasure speaking with you Monsieur Lauté.”

“And to you Vicomte. I shall sail off and test the waters with the ladies over there.” 

I laughed politely at his joke and turned to face the jester I preferred. A quietly murmured _follow me_ , and a nod in understanding and we set off toward the second floor. 

* * *

I led him up on the second floor balcony overlooking the backyard of the grand estate. The sky was clear, the air was crisp and the stars shone brightly. 

“You seem like a natural among the nobles. I’ve never been given the chance to swoop in and save you from an awkward situation!”

Erik chuckled and leaned against the railing. “Not yet, but the night is still young. No matter how many times I throw myself out there and greet the guests I always find myself circling back to you.” He gave me a sly glance. “The combination of Raoul and cock seem to attract me a lot.” 

I returned the grin. “I knew it would work.” I leaned back and placed my elbow against the railing. I’d seen the view many times over. I found the man next to me to be far more captivating to the eye. “Have you _never_ been in this kind of situation before? It fits you like a glove.”

“Never outside of the Opera. There has been a few masquerades where I’ve dressed up as one of the managers to suck up to new patrons. Or gain information to use against them.”

“I guess I shouldn’t be that surprised. Blackmail is your thing is it not?”

A sigh escaped him as he straightened and turned his face to the stars above. “I guess.”

I waited until he looked at me before tilting my head in question to the tired sigh. Erik's shoulders dropped, and he looked resigned and worn out. 

“Fear is a powerful tool. It can give you great many things, but never the things that matter the most. When I chose fear as my weapon I traded it for trust, friendship and love. I closed myself off from the rest of the world. I thought that was my fate. But as I move about the guests now as my alternative persona I find that I… like it. I like the laughter, the conversations, and I actually like the people too. I hope they never find reason to fear me.” He lifted his hand to his mask. Unconsciously or not I didn’t know. 

“I will never fear you.” I closed in on him after a quick look to make sure no one else was nearby. I let my warm hands slide down his back and my lips brushed his briefly. 

“How can you be so sure?”

“I know it because I know me. Because I know my strengths and my weaknesses.”

“You? Whatever could possibly your weakness be?”

I didn’t miss a beat. “Self control. Didn’t I tell you that the hardest part tonight would be keeping my hands to myself?” I squeezed his waist to emphasize my point, and the smile I was rewarded with shone brighter than any star that night.


	24. The distressed ghost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter!
> 
> A great big thank you to all that have read and given me kudos. :3
> 
> And a special thanks to xMisery_Hunterx and Lely for the lovely comments! :D *huge hugs*

* * *

“Raoul!”

Erik and I broke apart at the sound of Philippes voice. 

“Over here Philippe! At the balcony.”

A moment later and Philippe came into view. “There you are! Raoul I could really use a … oh, Monsieur Chambon, are you enjoying the evening?” Philippes surprise over seeing Erik was quickly concealed while he acted the perfect host. 

“Indeed I am. I must thank you yet again for inviting me. Monsieur le Vicomte was just showing me his new investment. A fine piece of British invention don’t you think?”

Philippe scoffed. “If he shows that off one more time tonight I might just tell him to _watch_ it. But then he might just take it literally…”

That elicited laughter from all of us. It felt great to see the two of them laughing together. They were both men that I cared a lot about. Men close to me whose opinions mattered and in whose presence I could be myself. Even disguised as a rooster. Seeing Erik's carefree smile warmed me to my very core. 

“I see the humour runs in the family. Perhaps you should have been the jester.”

“But who would then don this stunning piece?” He twirled around in his white masquerade costume. It was supposed to look like a ghost, but I was used to ghosts blending in and this one was definitely not blending in. The silver embroidery drew the eye almost as much as the glittering pearls did. He was _blending in_ just as much as a primadonna among peasants. Then again, who was I to talk.

Philippe continued with a lowered voice. “ _You_ if anyone should know why I dress like this.”

Erik froze and then threw a quick glance my way. No, I hadn’t told Philippe. Not about Erik's place at the opera nor our relationship. Philippe simply knew Erik as the charming composer Monsieur Chambon. I stepped in, finally finding a situation where I could help Erik out. 

“I’m sure the jesters jokes are far better than meagre wordplays.”

After my little hint it didn’t take much time for Erik to catch up. “I see. You are the g- _host_ of the evening!”

Philippe smiled and nodded in agreement but there was something in his manners that spoke of unease. I was just about to ask him about it when he did a fake couch and in my direction whispered:

“Can he be trusted to keep a secret?”

_He wanted to know if Erik cloud keep a secret? If he only knew…_

I nodded to my brother while discreetly meeting Erik's gaze. Apparently he’d heard Phillippes question too. He mouthed _Shall I go?_ and this time I shook my head. 

“What did you need brother? Am I to assume you found me for other reasons than to gawk at my watch?”

“Mmm, well yes. I could really use a pep talk right about now.” He turned to Erik. “I am about to ask Mademoiselle Celine to marry me.”

“Congratulations then! I wish you all the best in your upcoming marriage.”

Philippe mumbled something close to a _thank you_ before I interrupted. 

“What do you need a pep talk for? Just get in there and sweep her off her feet.”

“I was about to. When a thought struck me… What if she says no?”

“I’m sure she wont.” Erik commented in a considerate and calming way. 

I myself was on the verge of face palming. “That thought didn’t strike you until _now_?” 

Philippe hid his face in his hands. “I know. I know. I just got caught up in the happy bliss that’s been surrounding me for some time now.”

 _I know the feeling._ I mouthed to Erik. He winked at me. 

Philippe continued. “But what if I’m fooling myself. Marriage is a big step. It cannot be undone.”

I let out a sigh and pulled his hands from his face making him look up at me. “Does the mere sight of her make you happy?” He nodded. “Can you name her good traits?” He smiled and took a deep breath but I cut him off. “Does she turn you on?” His mouth snapped shut, but the blush on his face spoke volumes. “Then I guess your good to go. You’ve got the ring right?”

He produced the diamond ring from his back pocket and handed it to me. I carefully turned it over in my hands. 

“It’s pretty.”

“Thank you. I hope she thinks so too.” He took the ring back and stared at my hand. “Raoul. What happened to your ring? That one’s a poor replacement.”

It was meant as a jest. I knew my brother meant nothing by it, but from the corner of my eye I could see Erik flinch. Well I would have none of that. 

“I lost it.” _Along with my heart to the man I love._ “But I gained this a while later. If I didn’t know better I’d say this ring was magical, because every time I look upon it I feel like I could take on the world.” 

Erik was trying his hardest to keep his facial expression in check. The corner of his mouth twitched and the look he gave me conveyed just how much he loved that comment. And just how much he loved me. 

Philippe let loose an exasperated sigh. “Do you mind lending some of that strength to me? I’m going to need it in the following minutes.”

“You are going to be great. If she doesn’t say yes you can always blame it on your lack of a wristwatch.”

He snorted. “Less than five minutes and you’ve mentioned it four times already.”

“Three!” I know I sounded like a toddler, but in the company of my brother, regression wasn’t all that uncommon. Sadly. 

“Well it’s three to many.” Philippe turned to Erik next. “Than you for you guidance Monsieur Chanbon. When you tire of my brother and wish for a _real conversation_ , do come find me.”

_He asked for it._

I held my wrist up in front of me. “Oh would you look at that. Five minutes to ten. What a marvellous time for rejection.”

Philippe stuck his tongue out before disappearing into the mansion again. 

Erik chuckled. “So much for French nobility.”

* * *

We re-entered the mansion and went back to small talking with the guests. We didn’t have to wait many minutes before Philippe took centre stage. He gained the attention of everyone at the party before going down on one knee in front of Celine. 

“Since my own words falter each time our eyes meet I will quote Master Shakespeare:  
_Love to faults is always blind, always is to joy inclined._  
_Lawless, winged and unconfined, and breaks all chains from every mind._  
My darling, my hope, my dreams. You have my heart, will you have the rest of me as well? Will you marry me?”

“Yes!”

He got up and she flung herself into his arms. He spun her around in the air while the audience cheered and applauded. Servants entered with champagne to everyone and Philippe raised his glass to a toast. 

“To love!”

“To love!” was echoed from all the guests. Yellow eyes met mine over another glass of champagne. 

_Indeed. If anything was worth celebrating. It was love._


	25. Improvements and skilled fingers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! 100 kudos?!? :D That is absolutely amazing! Thank you, each and every one of you! This is remarkable. :) 
> 
> Let's celebrate it with a chapter that is slightly longer than usual. 
> 
> Be warned, explicit content ahead. Don't like? Then skip those parts.

* * *

“You’re improving.” 

“Thank you. Though it’s a lot harder than it looks.”

We sat at Erik's piano and he was teaching me to play. In theory I knew just how I wanted my fingers to move. It was transferring it to practice that had me at a loss. It would take me hours of repetition to play this song as it was supposed to be played. I didn’t mind spending that amount of time behind the piano. It was practicing in front of someone that had me on edge. When we’d started off I cringed at every wrong tone my fingers produced. I would glance up at Erik, mumble some kind of apology and wring my hands in my lap. 

He never cringed though. Not even once. Either he was far better at hiding his feelings than I thought or he actually didn’t mind. Instead of cringing he would place my hands back at the keys and tell me to go again, that Rome wasn’t built in a day and that it’s no shame in practicing. 

After a while I stopped apologising and managed to keep my hands on the keys even when they weren’t cooperating. I still cringed at my mishaps though. Old habits die hard. When practice time was over we both stood up and stretched. 

“Raoul can I… can I get you anything?”

“No thank you. That lunch left me quite full.”

“I meant as a gift. Something to show my gratitude for you breaching your fears to explore my world. In getting to know my world you also get to know a part of me.” He scratched the back of his head smiling bashfully. “I just want you to know how much I appreciate the effort.”

“How about giving me a prize once I can play it flawlessly. Or at least somewhat coherent.”

He smiled. “Sounds reasonable. What would you like?”

I grumbled. “The location of the last three chimneys…” I pouted. 

Erik threw his head back and laughed. “You _still_ haven’t found them?”

Red and mottled skin peeked out from the edges beneath the mask. I wondered…

“Fine! When you manage to play it without errors I’ll point out every single one of the fifty-four chimneys to you. Deal?”

“Deal. Seal it with a kiss?”

Two short strides and his arms was around me. “Do you have to ask?” Our lips connected and I moaned at the tingly feeling spreading throughout my body. I wrapped my arms around him in turn. One hand sneaking up to caress the back of his neck while the other brushed up along his spine. He groaned against my lips and pulled me tighter to him. I sucked his lower lip into my mouth and he rubbed his long length against mine. It didn’t take long for either of us to get hard in the others presence. 

“Bedroom?” Erik whispered one he caught his breath. 

“Yes. Bedroom.”

I started shedding my clothes on the way. Loosen the ties and opening the buttons for easy removal. Erik was close behind me, helping me off with my shirt before pushing me back unto the bed. He crawled over me and kissed me thoroughly. Our tongues battled for dominance, and I let him win simply for the feel of him plunging into me and roaming my mouth like he owned it. Like he owned me. A confident Erik was a sexy Erik. Oh, who was I kidding. Erik was always sexy, he barely needed to mention sex and I would be hard as a rock. I couldn’t help but get just a little extra turned on though when he took matters into his own hands. Both figuratively and literally. 

I rubbed our erections together, finding that much needed friction. Erik kissed me up along the length of my jaw. 

“Mmmm… Is that your hard cock Raoul? Do you want me to suck it for you? Do you want me to take it deep within my mouth and show you just how much I adore giving you pleasure, hmm?”

The thought had me bucking my hips wildly against his. “Yes! But I want to suck you too. It’s been too long since I tasted your length.”

Erik lifted himself above me and looked me in the eyes. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.” _My God how I’d been looking forward to this!_

The rest of the clothes came off in a hurry. 

Erik started sucking the head of my cock between his warm lips. It felt amazing but I couldn’t wait to taste him. 

“Erik. Get your ass over here, I want to suck you as you suck me.” 

He gave me a long lick up along the underside of my hard column and I hissed. 

“Fine. Pinch me if I’m pushing you too hard.” He crawled on top of me yet again, but this time with the added benefit of his dick close to my face and mine close to his. I grasped his long length and rolled my tongue around it. I drew it into my mouth and rejoiced at the feeling of Erik in me and around me. Slurping noises accompanied muffled groans. 

I took Erik in deeper and he groaned around my cock. The low vibrations of his groan elicited one in turn from me… Which pleased Erik. It was a vicious circle really. Vicious, nasty and incredibly pleasing. I massaged his balls with one hand and tickled the base of his spine with the other. 

He let go of my dick and gasped. “That’s it Raoul. I’m… hnnnnngh!” His hips jerked as he came and shot his load deep down my throat. I swallowed at he rolled away and then inhaled a much needed gulp of air.  
I leaned up on one elbow, loving the sight of him in post climactic bliss. He was trying to catch his breath with his eyes closed and a small smile playing on his lips. It wasn’t long though before playful yellow eyes met mine and he uttered a whispered warning. “My turn.”

He pulled himself to the foot of the bed where my length still stood at rigid attention. 

“It’s okay. You don’t have to go at it right away. You can… Aaahh!” My sentence was cut short as he took me in deep. He bounced up and down, faster and faster and my hands fisted the sheets to brace myself against his onslaught. His hands gripped my butt cheeks and he moulded them while pleasing me orally. Then his thumb brushed by my back entrance. Just the briefest of touches but enough to make me gasp his name in shock and pleasure. Who could have known _that_ would feel _so good_?

Erik seemed to know the source behind my cry and brushed his thumb past my puckered hole once again. Slower this time. It drew a strangled whine from me as my mind tried to keep up with the sensory overflow.

Erik stopped his sucking and raised his head to look at me. 

“Did you like that?”

A part of me was a little ashamed. I wasn’t supposed to like that right? Surely that wasn’t Gods intention when he created man in the first place. Then again, if I was going to hell anyhow I might as well have fun along the way. That, and I really didn’t want to lie to Erik. 

“Yes. I never even considered the possibility. But yes, it felt surprisingly amazing… and wicked.”

“Do you trust me?”

“With all that I am.”

He smiled, got up from the bed and left the room. I didn’t have to wait long though before he re-entered carrying a glass bottle with a yellow liquid in it. He poured a small amount of the liquid into the palm of his left hand and then coated the index finger of his right hand in it. 

He looked up at my questioning gaze and answered. “Olive oil. Now spread wide.”

I obediently spread my legs with a rush of anticipation. He licked the head of my cock as the oil covered finger rubbed around my hole. 

“Just relax, and tell me if it hurts okay? I’ll go slow.” True to his word he slowly pressed the tip of his finger into my ass. It was unlike anything I’d ever felt before. It felt dirty and forbidden in the sexiest way imaginable. Erik kissed up along my manhood and glanced up at me, studying my expression. The tip of his finger slowly curled and he massaged my ring from the inside. I moaned and spread my legs wider. The reaction was instinctual. 

Erik chuckled darkly. “So you want more Monsieur le Vicomte? I will make you scream my name and come so hard that all you can think about for the next week will be how good it felt to be fucked by my finger.”

I was panting hard now. But I knew what I wanted. “More. Give me more.”

Erik slowly pushed his finger further inside up me and then curled it upward. He brushed past something that sent out explosions of pleasure throughout my body. My startled expression and the sharp intake of breath made Erik smile. 

“There it is! Now be a good boy and come for me while I rub this lovely hidden spot of yours, hmm?” 

His mouth covered me again and his finger rubbed that delicious spot. Back and fourth. Back and fourth. I was chanting his name over and over. 

“Erik! Erik! ERIK! Aaaahh!”

He swallowed my cum and slowly pulled that long sinful finger out of me. 

“How do you feel?” Erik stretched out alongside me and I gathered him close. 

I answered him after a few deep breaths. “Like it was a good idea to trust you.”

“Glad to hear it.” He gave me a slow tender kiss on the lips. “Would it be insensitive of me if I left your side now? Just for half an hour or so?”

I snorted and smiled. “Go and compose to your hearts content. I’ll be here.”

“Thank you, I’ll be right back. And by the way, my heart is content whenever you’re nearby. Surely you know that by now.” He winked at me and left to ease the itch in his composers fingers. I myself lied back on the bed and relaxed.

_What a marvellous session! Apparently my piano skills wasn’t the only thing improving._


	26. Letters and bones

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A special thank you to Lely and Sunny who took the time to comment. :) I appreciate it! I love hearing your thoughts and opinions.

* * *

The sickening crack from my wrist should have convinced me that something was very wrong. Or the sharp pain that radiated up through my arm. But I’ve always had a stubborn streak. So I clenched my teeth, told my brother that I was indeed fine, got up on that feisty horse once again, and managed to ride back to the mansion before the pain became unbearable. 

I heard Philippe send after a doctor while I stumbled up to the second floor to reach my room. I was supposed to meet up with Erik at the Opera in little over two hours. I didn’t have time to fall off horses and get hurt. We were supposed to watch the rehearsals together and then finish the night off with a romantic dinner. I couldn’t miss that!

Someone brought me a glass of whiskey and I drowned it quickly. I was going to need more than that to numb the pain in my wrist for the reminder of the evening. 

_How could I sneak it past Erik that the lower part of my left arm was throbbing like hell?_

That conundrum was occupying my thoughts even as the doctor was ushered into the room. How Philippe managed to get him here so quickly was beyond me, but bring rich did have its perks. I gritted my teeth against the pain as he examined me. 

“I’m afraid, Monsieur le Vicomte, that one of the bones in your wrist is broken.”

_Broken?_

* * *

I was injected with morphine before the doctor wrapped me in “the plaster of Paris” with the servants help. They wet the cloth before wrapping it tightly around my arm. Then they rubbed it to make it stick. The rubbing part hurt even through the morphine clouding my brain. The morphine was not just numbing the pain but also making it hard to concentrate. I needed to find a way to send word to Erik, or he would worry over nothing. 

“Philippe, I need you to send word to Mademoiselle Christine Daae at the Opera. Tell her what happened and that I can’t come by to oversee the practice today. Tell her not to worry about me and that I’m sure she’ll do great anyhow.”

My first thought was of sending a note to Monsieur Reyer, but then there was an obvious risk of him reading it in silence and then putting it away in the huge pile of correspondence that took up the more part of his desk. Not even Erik would be able to find it there. 

I figured if I sent it to Christine, the rehearsal would most likely be interrupted while the note was read aloud. That would not only notify Erik but would also serve to show the ballet rats that Christine was still under my protection. Philippe looked at me as if I’d grown a second head.

“Christine Daae? The Diva? So father was actually right? You _really are_ courting her?”

As much as it pained me to lie to Philippe, and even more so to pretend my father had been right in his outrageous assumprions, I wasn’t about to let my pride stand in the way for getting my message across to Erik. 

Begrudgingly I grumbled an answer. “Yes. I am. And I don’t want her to worry.”

Philippe closed his mouth, but he still looked at me with eyes asking for some kind of explanation. He probably wondered why I hadn’t confided in him when these feelings started. I couldn’t very well tell him it’s because there were _no feelings to speak of_. Not for Christine at least.  
Philippe cleared his throat. “Right. I’ll see to it straight away.”

_Why did it feel like I let him down?_

* * *

“Raoul? Are you awake?”

It was Julie, one of the servant girls. If there were no nobles around then all the servants called me by my first name. Titles seemed out of place at home, and I’d told them as much. The same went for Philippe. 

I shook my head to clear it from morphine induced sleep. “Yes. I am. What’s the matter Julie?”

“A letter has been delivered to you. From Monsieur Chambon. The courier said it was urgent.” She handled the sealed was scroll to me. 

“Thank you. Would you fetch me parchment and a quill in case he needs an urgent reply?”

“Of course, Raoul. Right away.” She disappeared out of the room and I snapped the seal open. The writing was sharper then I expected. I knew Erik's handwriting, and I had a hard time imagining his hand showing this amount of carelessness to the parchment. 

_Monsieur le Vicomte,_  
_I hope this letter finds you well. I heard about the accident. How is the arm? Will you be able to come back to the Opera any time soon?_

_I will enclose a draft of the overture we spoke about last time. I look forward to hearing your opinions on the matter._

_The best of wishes, M. Chambon_

Even if the handwriting was sloppy, Erik seemed to take the situation with a mature amount of calm. A part of me thought he would be freaking out if I didn’t arrive on time, and especially when he heard I’d been hurt. Perhaps the logical and practical part of his brain won over. 

I unfolded the note sheets and started rummaging through the rows of notes. 

_He didn’t actually think he would get some kind of feedback on this did he?_

I loved music, but note sheets were still somewhat of a mystery to me. I turned to the next page and something caught my eye. On the back of the first page there was a message. It was written in the handwriting I remembered, and I swore I could almost hear his voice as I read it. 

_Raoul!_  
_Are you all right?_  
_Thrown off a horse? I’ve never been this close to changing my occupation from composer to butcher…_  
_Are you in much pain? What did the doctor say? I’m assuming you did have a doctor take a look at it. Otherwise I’ll strongly insist that you do. Broken bones hurt like hell and if they’re not straightened before they start to heal they’ll hurt for the remainder of your life._

_Do you have need of me? Any at all and I’ll find a way to get to you. I promise._

_If you are to reply to this; give the messenger the instruction to leave the letter at the top of your desk. I will make sure your office is unlocked._

_Yours,_

And then the notes started up again. Among the different pauses and fermata there was a single note. One I knew. He’d signed in his own musical language with a lone E, how fitting. 

Right on time Julie knocked on the door announcing that she’d brought parchment and quill. I tucked away Erik's note sheets and bid her welcome. 

After assuring that I didn’t need her to write down my dictate Julie left the room and I wrote my reply. 

_Heart of mine,_  
_Yes, I broke a bone in my wrist and yes I’ve had a doctor look at it. It’s straightened and bandaged. Right now I’m so doused with morphine that my pride hurts more than my arm though. In short; I’ll be fine. There is absolutely no need for you to worry yourself._

_The doctor said it would take approximately two months to heal, and after that I still have to be careful when using my left arm for at least another month or two. The remaining three chimneys suddenly feel eons away… But I will return to the Opera as soon as possible. Hopefully within a couple of days._

_I love you, and I miss you. But as much as the selfish part of me wants to write that I always have need of you, I don’t want you to subject yourself to the danger of travelling for my sake. I am well taken care of, even if my heart longs for your presence. My bones will heal at the estate, but my heart wont be whole until you are in my arms again._

_I shall once again return to dreamland where I can gaze into your beautiful eyes and listen to your whispers of things to come. The language you use… You should behave yourself!_

_Now I want you to raise your hand and place it three inches to the right of your heart. Can you feel it? I made you a promise, and I intend to keep it._

_With all my love, Raoul_


	27. Patrons and frustration

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you Lely and Danni for the wonderful comments! (And for finding my typos :3) *virtual cupcakes*

* * *

I entered the Opera a few days later. My left arm was in a sling so I wouldn’t use it by accident. It still hurt like hell most of the time. Even if it was probably a good idea to stay as motionless as possible my heart yearned for Erik. 

I met Christine in the parlour. Her pretty brown eyes seemed horrified at the sight of my bandaged arm. 

“Oh Raoul!” She reached for me but seemed to change her mind halfway. I thanked my lucky star. Touching the makeshift cast would do more harm than good. 

“I’m fine. Truly Christine. I’ve been through worse.” To lighten the mood I added: “You should have seen the other guy.” I winked at her. 

Her petit face tilted in confusion. “I thought you fell off a horse.”

Deciding that some jokes were wasted on her I brushed it off by changing subject.  
“How does the practice come along? The upcoming performance isn’t much further now right?”

Christine bounced up and down and clapped her hands. Her face lit up like a kid on Christmas morning. “It’s going to be absolutely amazing. The audience will love the passion, the suspense and the hope. And it’s finally a story with a happy ending. I can’t wait to sing it to all of Paris!”

“And I can’t wait to hear you Christine my dear.”

“Christine!” Meg was calling from further down the corridor and I excused myself. 

* * *

I had barely closed the door to my office before a strong pair of arms embraced me from behind. Mindful of my injury Erik held me carefully. He nuzzled my neck. A shuddering breath in, and a shuddering one out. 

His whispers tickled my neck. “Raoul.” His arms carefully tightened around me and I leaned back into his embrace. 

“I’m here.” My statement was to reassure him of my physical presence by his side. That my promise to always come back to him was as solid as ever. 

“Finally.” Erik's slow kisses up along my neck made my knees weak. 

“Even if I wasn’t here in person, my thoughts never left you.”

“I know. They were entangled with mine. There was a lot of shameful things going on there…” 

I chuckled darkly. “Is that so? Tell me all about it, and spare no details.”

Erik spun me around and in the process bumped my arm. I flinched. In part of a second Erik's expression turned from seducing to shocked. 

“I’m so sorry! Are you all right?”

I gritted my teeth against the pain and held back the groan that wanted to escape me. 

“I’m fine.” I bit back a little too sharply than intended. I forced a smile to my lips and met his gaze. “You were to give me shameful details?”

Erik frowned. “You’re in no condition for that. How is your arm?”

Disgruntled I heaved a sigh. “It’s nothing. It’s fine.”

“Raoul. It’s not fine. It hasn’t even been a week since you broke it. How bad is it?”

To be honest I hadn’t really paid that much attention to the doctor when he explained the intricacies regarding my injury. “The bone is off and it’ll take about two months to heal fully. That’s it. Since there’s nothing we can do about it we might as well make the best of the time spent waiting for it to heal. ”

Erik's face was set in stone. “No. I won’t hurt you.”

I hadn’t had Erik in three days now and I was already feeling the abstinence. “You won’t! There are quite a few positions in which I don’t have to use my arm at all.” I gave him my most charming smile for good measure. 

A snort escaped him and a small smile broke through his façade. “It’ll still be in danger. The risk of bumping in to your arm is imminent when things get heated.”

“Sooo… we’ll go slow?” I hadn’t given up yet. There was certain parts of me that had missed Erik more than others, and I wasn’t just referring to my heart. 

“No. Slow will surely escalate, and then we’re back at the conclusion _you’re in no condition for that_.”

My jaw dropped and my eyes went wide as saucers. “Are you suggesting celibacy?” I blinked repeatedly to clear my head. “For _two months_?”

Erik chuckled and placed his face in his hands. “You sound like it’s the end of the world Raoul.”

“It might as well be.” I sat on my desktop and stared at Erik as if he’d grown a second head. “From the very first time you groped me against the wall you hold centre stage in every one of my daydreams. My actual dreams too for that matter.”

Erik stepped closer and grasped my right hand in his. “And I’ll be by your side for as long as you want me to. Celibacy doesn’t mean that we’ll have to stay away from each other. I’ll keep you company.” He lifted my hands to his lips and kissed the palm. 

“You mean to say we are to simply overlook the amount of sexual tension between us?” I grasped his chin and looked him square in the eyes. The molten gold of his heated gaze met mine. The attraction was undeniable. 

“I do. I’m not saying It’ll be easy. But after three days of constant pressure in my chest, simply seeing you is like the first breath after a long time spent under water.”

I slid my thumb along his bottom lip. I knew exactly what Erik meant because I’d been there myself. The instant relief I’d felt as Erik's arms slid around me a few minutes ago spoke of that intense longing.

“I know the feeling.” 

As my hand dropped back to my desk I noticed a few scrolls waiting for me there. Correspondence most likely from other patrons that I needed to take care of. I cracked the wax seal of the closest one before my handicap reared its ugly face again. I needed two hands to hold the scroll open. I had one. After a pathetic attempt at shaking the scroll into submission Erik offered his assistance. 

“Allow me.” He took the scroll from my hands and rolled it open for me to read. I rummaged through the massage before summarising it to Erik. “It’s a potential new patron. A Compte from Provence. He’ll attend the next possible performance and if he likes it enough he’ll consider sponsoring the Opera.”

“From Provence? That’s a far way away. Surely there must be some Opera closer than this one.”

“He probably has some ties to this Opera, perhaps he knows Monsieur Reyer?”

“Then why didn’t he write to him?”

“I don’t know. We’ll find out after the performance.”

“You mean _you_ will find out.” Erik smile was kind. Grateful even. We both new I’d be the one to converse the potential new patron, but we were two in this odd kind of partnership and I wasn’t going to let him forget it. 

“I’ll talk to patrons and you hold open scrolls.” I winked at him. “It takes two to tango.” 

He chuckled. “And apparently to run Operas too.”

I knew what he meant but the scene playing in my head was simply too comical not to share. “Hah! The two of us doing a performance alone? I’d really wouldn’t want to see that. You would try to play as many instruments as possible while I would stumble about on stage in some resemblance of a dance? No, it takes definitely more than two to run an Opera.”

We shared laughter at the humoristic scenario. Erik took my hand and pulled me toward the opening in the wall. 

“Perhaps it wouldn’t be horrendous… Do you sing Raoul?” Excited yellow eyes met mine. After all this time I was still amazed by their beauty and the sheer emotion they conveyed. 

“Barely.” 

_I don’t like where this is going._

“Your wrist may keep you from playing piano, but it doesn’t restrict your voice!” He led me into the darkness as his voice lowered to a whisper. “Come my love. Let me explore a whole new side of you.”


	28. Almost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to Bryana who loved the last line of last chapter. :3 Thank you for the lovely comment. 
> 
> Also thank you to backfromthedead91 for commenting! :D

* * *

_Almost._

I could _almost_ retie my pantaloons. After doing my business in Erik's bathroom and cleaning myself up in the makeshift washbasin I was just going to fix my clothes before enjoying afternoon tea with my dearest. Fixing my clothes proved easier said than done though. With one arm useless in a sling my fumbling was less than successful. 

When I’d finally grasped the two cords in my right hand I had to tie them together. It was yet another feat that was easier said than done. I had almost managed to make a knot when I lost my grip on one end, and just like that I was back at square one. 

The string of curses that left me is one I’d rather not repeat. Erik with his keen hearing came rushing.

“Raoul? Is everything alright in there?” 

I pulled the curtain that separated us aside. I must have looked like a toddler with my pantaloons around my ankles and my lips in an undeniable pout. 

“ _All right_ is relative. I feel utterly pathetic. I cannot even retie my own clothes! But no, I’m not hurt if that’s what you’re asking.”

Erik was trying his hardest to suppress his laughter. He almost succeeded. _Almost._

“Hehrm… yes, well I can see that. Do you require assistance?” His smile was far too sweet to be innocent. 

_Why oh why didn’t I take a pair with buttons today?_  
It was either accepting the help or making a fool out of myself by trying again, but this time with the added disadvantage of doing it in front of him. 

“Fine.” I grumbled and unconsciously pouted even more. 

Erik wouldn’t pass up on an opportunity to tease me. Not when it was handed to him on a silver platter. “Now now young lad. That isn’t how one asks for a favour is it?”

I glared daggers at Erik, but through gritted teeth I asked: “Would you mind helping me, please?”

Erik seemed very pleased with himself. “There you go.” Erik kneeled in front of me to refasten my garments. In the Chagny mansion I had a dresser who helped me suit up each morning. She worked quickly with an efficiency that spoke of many years of experience. That didn’t feel anywhere near as awkward as asking Erik for help. Was it because he was a musician and not a dresser? Or that I considered us equals and yet he was kneeling in front of me? No, it was something else. 

I had come to love the independence that the Opera gave me. In here I was free to make my own choices. I had my own office, _I_ filled my schedule, and _I_ chose my company. I was free to spend as much time as I wanted with my partner under ground. I even cooked my very own food for Christ sake! 

I huffed as I realised that cooking was another thing on the growing list over things you need two hands for. It annoyed me to no end that I’d been robbed of the ability to take care of myself. What would I’ve done without Erik nearby? Entered the Opera in my undergarments? I pursed my lips together and shook my head to clear the embarrassing sight from my mind. 

Erik finished off the neat rosette and stood in front of me. The teasing smile was gone from his face. Instead he looked quizzical. “What’s wrong Raoul? What’s bothering you?”

My gaze swept across the room behind him. I didn’t want my eyes to give him the wrong impression. I was annoyed, but he wasn’t to blame for that. “I don’t like feeling this… useless. It’s unnerving.” I walked into the living room behind him and walked up to the piano. “I can’t play, nor cook, nor tie my own damned breeches after a bathroom break.” I marched over to Erik's large bookcase. I pulled out one of his huge glossaries and placed it on the coffee table. 

I could barely make out Erik's quiet steps as he moved up behind me. I rarely lost my temper so I wasn’t surprised that he kept his distance unsure of how to reach through to me. His curiosity got the better of him though. “What are you doing?”

At that time I had almost reached the words starting with the letter P. “I’m looking up _pathetic_. I want to see if they got my chin right.”

Erik's hand on mine stopped me. He slowly turned me to face him. He lifted my chin so I wouldn’t have any choice but to look him in the eye. I couldn’t help it. My gaze was hard and unrelenting, daring him to contradict my unspoken statement.

If he saw the warning he didn’t heed it. “You’re not pathetic Raoul. You’re hurt. There is a vast difference.”

I was just about to argue with him when he closed the distance between us and kissed me. 

_Wait. What was I about to say again?_

Whatever it was it couldn’t have been half as important as kissing Erik and therefore I gave myself over to the pleasure that only my partner could give me. That kiss almost made me forget my gnawing irritation. _Almost._

We broke apart and I leaned my forehead against his. “You shouldn’t have to tend to my every need while I’m here. Perhaps it’s better if I return to the mansion. At least until I won’t be a burden anymore.” 

“No. You are making a far bigger deal out of this than it has to be. I don’t mind cooking for you. Nor do I mind helping you dress or do you favours. So you need help with everyday tasks. So what? Who cares?”

“I care.”

“I don’t.”

His sharp reply earned him a small smile and another kiss. 

“Look, Raoul. I know it’s scary to depend on someone else. But you should know that if you fall, I will do everything in my power to catch you.” The corner of his mouth lifted as he continued. “And if you’ve already fallen I will do whatever it takes to nurse you back to health.” He took my face in his hands and brought his own so close that our lips were almost touching. _Almost._ “So let me prove to you that I’m worthy of that trust.”

“I will. If you promise to let me know if I ever become a nuisance.”

“That won’t be a problem, but if it will ease your mind then sure. I promise.” He sealed it with a kiss. As if I wasn’t addicted to his kisses already. “Now how about some music?”

I blame my unguarded answer on the fact that his lips were very distracting. “Sure. What did you have in mind?”

Erik's yellow eyes sparkled. 

_Uh-oh._

“I’m glad you ask. George Frideric Handel has written a piece called ‘Comfort ye my people’. It’s to be sung by a tenor.” He backed away a few steps and offered me his hand. 

“I hope your expectations aren’t too high.” I warned him but still took his hand, and let him lead me to the piano. 

* * *

 

Half an hour later and I almost had it. _Almost._ Erik's instructions and incessant coaxing made me feel like this actually wasn’t such a bad idea. Singing proved to be easier than playing the piano. 

“Again. I almost had it this time!”

Erik chuckled at my eager plea and started playing the intro yet again. This time I sang a little bit better then the last but there were still some things I needed to work on. 

I cleared my throat, not used to straining my voice like this. “I should get some water.”

A sudden realisation struck me.

I looked up from the note sheet to see the same insight had come to Erik as well. 

“The tea!”

We both started off toward the kitchen. 

“It’s probably beyond bitter by now.”

“And cold.”

“Then perhaps you should brew us some more.” I glanced up at Erik. Yes. He had indeed noticed my choice of words. 

“It will be my pleasure.”

Both of us managed to keep a straight face. _Almost._


	29. Cupids and coincidences

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A special thank you to MythyMeow for commenting on _Almost_ , one of my favourite chapters so far. :)
> 
> Hugs go out to all of my readers!

* * *

“She’s been ogling that cellist for some time now.”

“Are we talking about the same cellist that always misplaces his note sheets?”

I remembered Erik's comment about forgetful cellists from back when he’d first let me into his home. That seemed like ages ago. Then these dark passageways had seemed menacing, and now strutting down into the darkness was second nature to me. Even if I knew the twists and turns I still preferred it when we made the trips together. Like we did now. Then again, that had less to do with the actual tunnels and more to do with my fascination with the man next to me. 

“Yes. The short brunette.”

“And how does he feel about her then?” I loved to gossip about the crew almost as much as Erik did. 

“I don’t know. He probably hasn’t noticed her. She’s quite shy.”

The petit blonde worked behind the scenes, applying the varying make-up to the performers. Her quiet persona hid her from plain sight. I hadn’t even noticed her until Erik pointed her out earlier that day. 

“Aww, wouldn’t it be cute with a happy couple in the crew?” As the path widened I fell into step next to Erik and took his hand in mine, lacing our fingers. “ _Another_ happy couple, that is to say.” I winked at him. 

His hand gave mine a reassuring squeeze. “Perhaps.”

* * *

 

I was speaking to Monsieur Reyer when an interesting comment from someone nearby caught my attention. 

“I swear my note sheets have a life of their own! Their tendencies to wander off is nothing new but this is the first time they were in the make-up lounge.”

It was the short cellist. The trombonists next to him laughed. 

“You never cease to surprise us Gaston. The make-up lounge? Are you drunk? That’s in the opposite direction of our lounge!” Another round of shared laughter. 

“I know! At least _now_ I know. I have no memory of ever being there before, and still that’s where they were found. Perhaps I am drunk after all… But I don’t remember drinking anything either.”

“So you’ve passed that limit as well? No more imbibing for you young lad.” Gaston was given a friendly slap on the back.

_Coincidental? I don’t think so._

* * *

I found Erik in box five. “Let me guess. You snuck his note sheets into her room so they would have to meet, is that it?”

Yellow eyes a little too wide to be entirely innocent met mine. “Perhaps.”

I feigned to scold him, furrowing my brow and crossing my arms in front of me. “Then I have but one question for you Erik.”

Erik's eyes widened even more, but this time with worry. “I meant no harm. I thought you wanted them to get together. I only did it because you seemed so happy when…”

I cut him off. Pulling him close by his lapels with my uninjured hand. “My question is: Why didn’t you let me in on this?” I let the frown give way to the giddy smile that had wanted to break free for some time now. 

Erik exhaled as he visibly relaxed. Even though he know I was jesting he answered my question seriously. “I’m used to doing things on my own. Besides, I wanted to surprise you.”

“Well not any more you ain’t. Together we’ll be the best cupid there ever was. Since I’ve studied archery I’ll take care of the bow and arrows and you can be the cute one in the diaper.”

Even if Erik's eyes conveyed that he wasn’t amused, he was soon laughing right along with me. Not even pretended pride could contain the laughter bubbling up inside of him at the thought of that hilarious scenario. Perhaps it wasn’t the evil laughter of a mastermind with a plan. But even if the laughter was a bit lacking, the plan had already started taking form. 

* * *

“Modemoiselle Yvette, I must say you did a great job with Christines make-up today. It’s a masterpiece.” The petit lady blushed as she looked up at me through her blonde bangs. 

“Thank you Monsieur le Vicomte. I always do my very best.”

“I see that. And I want you to know how much I appreciate it.”

She grew a few inches as my compliment made her stand up straight. 

_Good. She should be proud of her work._

“Thank you Monsieur!”

_Time to set our plan in action…_

“I hear you help the musicians out as well.”

Her brow furrowed, trying to discern my meaning. “What do you mean?”

“Playing along with Gastons not so subtle games for one.”

“Oh, I just handed him his note sheets that’s all.” Yvette blushed and studied the floor beyond her toes intently. 

I snorted. “Right. You don’t find it the least bit suspicious that he wanders off in the wrong direction of his own lounge and then carelessly misplaces his note sheets in a room solely intended for make-up?”

“Excuse me Monsieur. But haven’t _you_ lost your way in this Opera on more than one occasion these past months?”

A sound that wasn’t far off _a chuckle_ could be heard from inside the wall I leaned up against. 

“That’s beside the point.” 

“I’m sorry. That was out of line. You are indeed right. Gaston is forgetful but that was odd even for him. What… do you think he wants?”

“Talk to him and find out.” I turned to leave and then looked back over my shoulder. “Yvette, Great outcomes is usually the result of great courage. Remember that.”

* * *

After a short talk with some of Gastons trombone-playing friends I hid with Erik inside one of the Operas cramped walls. 

“Schh Roaul. If you continue making that amount of noise they will be hearing us and not the other way around.”

“Not everyone was born with the agility of a graceful feline.” I muttered even as I tried to keep the bumping and grunts to a minimum as we made our way to the wall connected to the musicians lounge. 

Perhaps Erik thought his words to be too harsh because when we’d rounded a corner he pulled me toward him and gave me a whispered reassurance. “Well this specific feline thinks you’re purr-fect.” He gave me a quick peck on the cheek. “When you’re not tearing down the Opera from the inside that is.”

“Hey. I’m trying.”

He sighed despondently. “I know. I try not to think about the outcome if _you weren’t trying_.”

* * *

“Gaston, you should give the lass something as a thanks for bringing back your notes.”

“Yvette? Yeah, perhaps. But what should I get her?”

“Flowers my friend. Girlies love flowers.”

“What if she sees the flowers as something more?”

“Is that so bad? She’s been checking you out for quite some time now.”

There was a short pause and I pressed my ear tighter to the wall. 

“Really?” Gaston sounded hopeful. I cursed the fact that I couldn’t see their faces through the wall. “Are you sure?”

“That’s what the rumours say… …Hey, where are you going?”

I heard the door open and Gastons voice seemed further away as he answered. “I’m out to find the prettiest roses in all of Paris. I might forget where I put my belongings but I’d be dead before I forgot a face like hers.”


	30. Unmasked

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To Lely. Who has internet again! Hopefully.

* * *

_Aouch! Damnation! That hurt like hell._

I woke up to the sound of my own yelp. Tossing and turning on the sofa with a broken arm wasn’t a problem most nights, but that night I’d somehow managed to slam my wrist into the nearby coffee table. Hard. I’m not ashamed to admit that the pain brought tears to my eyes. I clutched my throbbing arm closely to my chest and tried to keep down the whimpers that escaped me. I didn’t want to wake Erik. 

_Too late._

I heard the sound of Erik's bare feet as he hurried over to me. I had rolled over with my face to the sofas backrest. I tried to wipe away my tears before he could notice them. A hand squeezed my shoulder slightly. “Raoul, are you awake? Are you okay?”

My inhalation became a little too quick to be natural, a normal reaction after crying, but unwanted nonetheless. “Yes and no. It seems your coffee table decided to attack me in the middle of the night. Assaulting my weakest point.” I let out a groan. He was already awake now, so what harm was there in grunting. “Gaah. It hasn’t hurt like this since I broke it.”

“Will you let me have a look at it? I obtained some ‘Plaster of Paris’ a few days ago in case you would need to exchange the cast. I had hoped to wait at least a few more days before changing it though. The more you heal the less the rubbing will hurt.” He stroked me up and down along my back distracting my nerve endings with far pleasurable sensations. 

“Do you actually think the cast needs changing?” I rolled over to face him and my heart nearly stopped. 

…

He wasn’t wearing his mask.

…

Erik, the Phantom of the Opera Populaire, bared his face.

…

His trousers was only buttoned halfway and the shirt was haphazardly hanging open. He must have thrown on the very necessities in a rush to get to me as quickly as possible. And in that rush he had forgotten about his mask.

I was seeing his whole face for the first time. My eyes grew wide and my jaw slack. The urge to recoil was stronger than I’d ever imagined. The stage hand hadn’t been too far off when he’d compared Erik's face to that of a gargoyle. There were four large blistering boils. One close to his nose. One at the edge of where his brow should have been. One on the corner of his mouth, and the largest one covering the more part of his cheek.

_My partner has only one eyebrow._

That thought made me feel strangely uncomfortable. The skin was as red and mottled. I’d imagined Erik's deformity to look like scorch marks but I couldn’t have imagined the sheer extent of the malformation.

_Does it hurt?_

We’d mentioned in passing that his mask was uncomfortable to sleep in. Was it always uncomfortable? It didn’t look like he had open wounds but it could still hurt. I fought the sudden urge to grasp the back of his head and hold him to my chest. As if protecting him from pain, or perhaps the outside world. 

Thankfully Erik hadn’t noticed any of my reactions. I was relieved that his yellow eyes hadn’t noticed anything out of the ordinary yet. As I’d turned around his focus had drifted to my broken wrist. He carefully unlaced the bandage surrounding the cast while he answered my question. 

“Yes. You need to replace the cast a few times during the two month period. Otherwise bacteria will grow in the cast which in turn can cause an infection. Does this hurt?” He prodded the inside of my lower arm.

His eyes met mine and I realised I had to answer before he noticed anything was off. I didn’t want to make a big scene out of this. If Erik had forgotten about his mask then I was not going to be the one to remind him about it. I didn’t want him to think that I was just as judging as the people he met in his youth. Hell, the more part of his adulthood too. 

“Everything hurts at the moment.”

His free hand squeezed my thigh in comfort. “I know. Broken bones hurt like hell. Can you move your fingers like this?” He flexed his fingers and I tried to mimic his motions. 

“You seem like you talk from experience. Have you broken anything?”

He didn’t answer right away but continued to probe my arm and study it from different angles. He let out a sigh before he replied. “Yes. Mostly ribs. During my time with the gypsies. And then a some other bones while I constructed the labyrinth down here. But that was many years ago.” 

He caught my right hand in his and brought it up to his face to kiss the back of it. “I whish I could have broken it instead of you.”

My left arm throbbed painfully and I looked at the man hunched before me. The man with the gargoyle face who pressed my hand to his lips. “Why? You’ve been through this many times over. You know how much it hurts.”

He looked up at me and the sheer love in his eyes took me aback. “I do. And that’s precisely why.”

Here was a man. Burnt and broken, in many aspects whereof some literal. A man who had survived the beatings of a few and the scorn of many, and who still somehow found it in him to love. And to love so unconditionally that he would run from his bed in the middle of the night because he couldn’t bear to hear his beloved in anguish. A love so pure that he would gladly take the pain into his own battered body rather than watching his loved one suffer.

I must have done something very right in my life, to deserve him.

Words failed me so I conveyed my love in the only other way I knew how. I smiled and kissed him, letting my lips linger on his. A time somewhere in between a minute and an eternity passed. We broke the kiss but stayed huddled together, enjoying the shared breaths and the close proximity. He was the first one to find his voice.

“I love you.”

In that moment I swore that I would do everything within my power to make Erik as happy and carefree as possible. He deserved to be showered with love and attention. “I love you more Erik.”

I was completely serious but he snorted and shook his head. “Not possible.” Then he turned back to my arm again. “The bone seems to be in place. If it starts to swell you have to see a doctor again. Do you need morphine to go back to sleep?” He wrapped my wrist in the bandage once again.

“No. I’m tired enough as it is.” I laid back down and let out a huge yawn. 

He tucked me in and kissed my forehead. “All right. Don’t hesitate to call for me if you need anything. I’ll move the table so it won’t attack you again.” True to his word he moved the table out of the way before disappearing into his own bedroom.

* * *

The next morning the aching in my arm was remarkably less prominent. I heard sizzling sounds from the kitchen. Erik was making breakfast. I found him in his normal impeccable attire at the stove frying some eggs. 

“Good morning Raoul. Did you sleep well?” 

“Aside from the attacking table, yes. Thank you for coming to rescue by the way. You didn’t have to but it was sweet nonetheless.”

He snickered. “Attacking table? Rescue? What do you mean?”

“When I slammed my arm into the table and woke you up. Thanks for checking up on me.”

“Wait what? Did you slam your wrist? Are you okay?”

“I am now but… …you know that. Don’t you remember? You were there with me.”

He slowly shook his head. “No Raoul. I wasn’t.” There was a small tugging at the corner of his lips. “When you wrote that you dreamed about me I’d hoped that the dreams were of a completely different character. Has the abstentionism gone so far that you’ve stopped dreaming of our intimate moments?”

“Not at all… I just…” 

_The coffee table!_

I turned and quickly walked back to the living room. The coffee table was in it’s ordinary place, within easy reach of the sofa.

_How? What? When?!_

_Was all that just a dream?_


	31. Arguments and priorities

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to Recsails, Lely and Memento_vitae. Thank you for all the lovely comments! They keep me going!

* * *

“I said I was sorry but that I simply couldn’t…”

I stopped abruptly as Erik quickly spun around to face me. 

“Really now? You _couldn’t_ get past that slow old man?”

_He’s angry. I get that. But we all had to make concessions for this job. And these were part of mine. I just had to make him understand._

“I _couldn’t_ very well shove him away and make a run for it. In difference to me he would break more than a wrist if he fell.” The person who was at the epicentre of our argument was a wrinkled man in his seventies. He was also a Compte from Provence and a potential new patron. 

“You know that I don’t mean _literally_. You should have made up some excuse to get away.”

_Why are we even arguing about this?_

Half an hour after the curtain had been drawn at the first performance of Erik's newest Opera we should be celebrating. God knows the rest of the crew did. They had all done a marvellous job and the audience loved it. I had played my role well, though my role was certainly not one on stage. I greeted the audience in the large entrance hall and small talked with the nobles. I took it upon myself to show the Compte this ‘beautiful jewel of Paris’. I talked about the exterior, the interior, and the upcoming show. And when he asked me to enjoy the show by his side I couldn’t say no. I _couldn’t_. 

“His wife recently passed away. She’d been to Populaire twice in her youth and loved every second of it. Her last wish was that he’d experience the same joy she did.” It was touching really. 

“Aww.” Erik's tone was dripping with sarcasm. “Don’t you just love it when the wishes of the dead means more then the wishes of the living?”

I sighed. “Erik you know I treasure your wishes…”

He cut me off. “Then why didn’t you? 

“It’s part of my job to be nice and accommodating. He’ll now become a patron… most likely.”

Erik opened his mouth at if to retaliate but then seemed to change his mind. His expression became unreadable as he put on a mask of careless indifference. He turned and left for his room. 

“I’m afraid I won’t be much of a company tonight. So if you’ll excuse me.” He was shutting me out. 

Out of his room.  
Out of his thoughts.  
Out of his emotions. 

_No! I could take his anger and disappointment, but I would not stand back for indifference._

“Erik, Wait!” I hurried to catch up with him. “You’re angry and hurt. I get that. But don’t shut me out. Talk to me.” I used my uninjured arm as I pulled him closer. I laced my fingers with his and waited. 

His response came after a few seconds in the form of a small squeeze. He still wouldn’t look at me, but he tried to explain. 

“It’s not a common occurrence for me to write an Opera. Especially not to the man I love. I’ve worked so hard to perfect it, for you, and then…” He trailed off and slid his free hand through his hair. “… and then you watched it with someone else.”

My tone was softer to match his. “Erik, my heart beats for you and you alone. Surely you know that by now.”

“I know. That’s not the problem. I just…” He let out a sigh and studied the room behind me without actually seeing it. “I wanted to see your reactions. For months my sole focus has been on stage, or on the notes coming from the orchestra pit. This is unlike anything I’ve ever written before, and I wanted it to be flawless.”

“It was. The show was marvellous. Truly!”

“I know.” His mouth was pursed in a bitter line. “Which is exactly why I wanted to spend the whole time tonight studying _you_. I wanted to see for myself where you’d smile, laugh, or get goose bumps.” His eyes finally met mine as his lips relaxed into a resigned smile. “You know how addicted I am to your gasps. I store each and every one of them away in my long term memory so that I’ll never forget them. So they will always be with me.”

I was a fool. Here I’d seen taking care of the Compte as my part of our bargain. If me and Erik were to run this Opera together we had to play our different parts and these were part of mine. I didn’t realise that I’d be forsaking my responsibilities in this relationship. When Erik asked me to join him in box five, I’d simply thought he’d wanted us to celebrate his success. A glass of wine, a breath-taking performance and literally breath-taking kisses in the breaks. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t realise what it meant to you.”

Erik nodded slowly, accepting my apology. 

“I promise to sit with you next time.”

Erik grunted something along the line of _it’s not the same_ , but seemed to accept it nonetheless. 

_So much for making Erik as happy as possible… Well at least I’m trying._

“Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?”

Erik looked up at me and tilted his head in confusion. “What do you mean?”

His clueless response to my kindness made my heart ache. I knew life hadn’t been kind to Erik, but each time he was confounded by my acceptance or care it struck me all over again. There was so much in life that he’d missed out on. Well I intended to make sure that we made up for it. He would be and feel loved and accepted. He deserved the very best. 

“Anything. What does it take to bring a smile to your face?”

_Not much it would seem as the corners of his mouths was already rising._

“I… I… I don’t know actually. Aside from the frustration of not seeing you under the show I’m actually quite happy. You were right, the audience wanted passion. And that’s what they got. Is it too much to hope that we’ll be sold out for the upcoming shows?”

“Not with that premiere. You should be proud. You put a lot of hard work into this and it paid off. Now, how do you want to celebrate, heart of mine?”  
“Perhaps we could sneak up unto the roof. I could use a bit of fresh air.”

* * *

After I’d chased some of the crew away from the rooftop claiming that I needed it alone to think, Erik approached me. The clouds were covering the sky and the hour was late. The darkness lay around us like a thick blanket. Even Erik's mask was hard to make out in the blackness surrounding us. 

I tried not to stare at his mask and imagine what’s behind it. Erik had convinced me that the whole encounter was a dream. In the following days we’d had our hands full with the final preparations for the show. We hadn’t talked anymore about it. But I hadn’t forgotten. I knew I needed to confront him about his mask soon, whether I’d dreamt it or not, but that night was not tonight. 

A few minutes of silence and I turned to Erik. “What’s on your mind?” 

“That I’m sorry. I apologise for lashing out at you. I know you tried to do the right thing. And I agree, the Opera need as many patrons as possible, and you are indeed the right man for the job. You are the most charming man I know.” He chuckled. “Not that my circle of acquaintances is anything to brag about.”

I laughed along with him. “Thank you.” I couldn’t help but tease him though. “But since I’m the just about the _only_ man you know, doesn’t that make me the least charming too?”

He smiled and hugged me close. “No. You could never be anything but the best… in that aspect.”

I nuzzled his neck. “Hey, what are you implying?”

“That you’ve got some work to do on your _getting-away-from-slow-old-men-skills_. Otherwise, you're perfect.”


	32. A midday stroll

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So eh... a slightly longer break than usual. *shrugs* Life got in the way.  
> Here's another update. :) (And btw, I intended to make this chapter a cliffhanger but it turned out differently when I actually wrote it. Sometimes the story has a life of it's own I guess.)
> 
> And thank you to; backfromthedead91, AshleyMadison910, Archangel_Arri, Lely, Memento_vitae, and Aleeva for all the lovely comments! :D

* * *

“That much?” Erik seemed happily surprised. He turned to look at me from under the wide brim of his hat. 

I nodded. “Yes. That much. The last show was completely sold out. And after that exuberant review in last weeks paper _everyone_ is talking about it. If there is still more people wanting to see it after the next three performances we might just have to do a matinée. A bonus show where we can sell the tickets at an even higher price. Perhaps throw in an extra song or two.”

I listened to the crunch of the gravel under our shoes as I waited for his reply. We were taking a walk around an abandoned graveyard nearby. The air was cool and refreshing. Both of us had bundled up in thick scarves and hats. 

It took quite some coaxing to get Erik to come with me. I told him no one was likely to see his mask behind the scarf and the hat, and if anyone came to close I’d intervene to make sure he could get away. He trusted me, but showing up in the outside world in broad daylight still had him on edge. When he still hesitated I used my secret weapon. 

In todays morning paper there’d been a warning about robbers in central Paris. And so I shrugged my shoulders and casually asked Erik _if I could borrow one of his knives if I were to go out alone, since I never knew who I’d bump into._ Nice? To use his protective side to win him over? Certainly not. But I told myself it was for a good cause. 

“I see absolutely no reason for why your father excluded you from the family banking business. You are a businessman if I ever saw one.”

I snorted. “Nah. Only if it’s a business I like. Something I believe in.”

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For believing in me. In my creations.”

“I didn’t need much faith. You’ve had me at your mercy ever since you played that requiem to me.”

His eyes conveyed the smile that was hidden behind the scarf.

We trudged along the path in silence for a few minutes. No one else in sight. 

Erik hummed a few notes. “The requiem, yes. A fitting peace for a place like this. Where people come to rest.”

“It seems like ages ago. I think I had feelings for you even back then. I couldn’t pinpoint the feelings exactly, but I liked it. I liked your wordplays, your talent, your company. They all made me want to crave more. And more is what I got.” I winked at him.

It felt good to flirt again. Erik was still adamant about celibacy until I was fully healed, but flirting didn’t count. Nor did kisses, or embraces, or backrubs, or…

“I’m still astonished that you chose me.” Erik shook his head in disbelief. 

“Please. You are a gorgeous man. Of course I fell for you!”

Erik gave me a tongue-in-cheek reply. “So you mean it had nothing to do with the trapdoor I set up on stage?” 

I laughed. Erik's quick tongue brought me pleasure in many ways. I tried to get my mind out of the gutter by continuing our conversation.

“So when did you start to have feelings for me?”

“I don’t know. I cannot say for sure. I’ve never been attracted to any man before. Some women yes, but never any men.”

He said it carelessly. Like he was just stating facts.  
He probably was.  
He just didn’t realise that his words sent a chill throughout my body. 

_Never been attracted to men? Or any man at all? Did he… ... did he prefer women?_

I shouldn’t have been shocked. Most men did prefer the other sex. It just never struck me that Erik would. He was my partner. He was mine. He loved me. I didn’t doubt that. 

But small insecurities somehow managed to slip by my defences and grow into questions. Questions to which I wasn’t sure I wanted to know the answer. 

_Did he ever wish I’d been born a girl?_  
_Did he pick me simply because since I was the only available option?_

I did my best to keep my voice steady as I asked: “So what made you change your mind?”

“You did.” Erik glanced around us quickly before grasping my right hand in his. “I’ve never felt _this_ way for anyone before. Sure I’ve had urges, but never anything beyond the carnal pleasures of the flesh.” His thumb traced invisible patterns on the back of my hand. “So in all honesty, it’s not just that I haven’t fallen for any man before you came along. I haven’t loved anyone. Not in a partner kind-of-way at least. You’ve changed me in so many ways. You opened my eyes to a happiness that I didn’t know resided within me.”

Internally, I let out a huge sigh of relief. Erik wouldn’t have picked just about anyone who showed interest in him. I knew that, but it was still such a relief to hear it out loud.  
“I’m happy to hear that.”

“Can you believe how far we’ve come? I’d like to freeze time at this very moment. Put the world on pause, and simply smile.” He smiled at the sky before snorting and shaking his head. “If I’d told myself from half a year ago that I’d say that now... well… I probably wouldn’t have believed me.” His scarf slid down further onto his neck as he lowered his gaze to mine once again.

“Not that I _can_ believe! You were quite the opposite of cheerful when I first met you.”

“I didn’t have any reason to smile.”

“Ah. You didn’t have a companion with my amazing sense of humour. Which reminds me, I heard a great joke backstage the other day.” I smiled at him expectantly. 

He knew I wanted him to ask what it was, but in true Erik-being-playful-manner he pretended not to notice. 

“That’s nice. It’s really windy here don’t you think?” He kept a straight face up until he saw my largely exaggerated pout. Then he burst out laughing. 

“Hey! You’re supposed to laugh _after_ the joke!”

When he chuckled and tilted his head away from me I could see further under his mask. I could see it better in the broad daylight. The little glimpse I caught was enough to confirm my suspicions. _It couldn’t possibly have been a dream._

He caught his breath enough to answer me. “Fine. Tell me.”

“What’s the magic word?”

“Please, Raoul. Would you _please_ tell me?”

“Well since you’re simply dying to hear it: Why are a violinists fingers like lightning?”

“Why?”

“They rarely strike the same spot twice!”

We chuckled in unison. I tried to glance at his real face without him noticing. I know he hated his face above just about everything else. And I also knew that he was certain I’d leave if I ever saw it. Dream or no dream, I wouldn’t do that, but he wouldn’t be so easily convinced. If I ever were to confront him about the mask or the dream again we would have to be home. Or somewhere where he’d feel safe. Putting pressure on him in this kind of situation would only make matters worse. Therefore I opted for voicing the other thought that occupied my mind. 

“Do you have any idea how much I love you?” 

He shook his head. 

I spread my arms as wide as possible to his great delight.

“That much?”

“Yes. That much.”


	33. Footsteps

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To Lely, Alison S., Archangel_Arri, and especially eragon19 and Memento_vitae (for reasons that will be explained in the end notes.) Thank you all for the lovely comments! To quote Erik from the musical: "You have truly made my night!"

* * *

“Erik?”

“Yes dear?”

_Here we go! No time like the present and all that._

“I wouldn’t leave if you showed me what’s under the mask.”

* * *

Erik froze mid-step. He was on his way of giving me a refill, and the tiny whiskey glass in his hand wobbled. 

His voice was calm though as he answered me in his best stating-a-fact-voice. “You wouldn’t know that, and it’s a risk I’m not willing to take. End of discussion.”

_Now that last sentence boarded on anger…_

Erik who usually moved about with the grace of a feline now succumbed to the jerky movements of stress. It pained me to know that I was the one putting him under pressure, but this had to get out in the open. Otherwise he would never begin to truly relax in my presence. 

“You don’t get to decide when the discussion has ended.” My tone was perhaps a bit harsh, but I needed him to understand that I was unrelenting on this point. He couldn’t scare me into submission. Deep down I knew he didn’t want to, so I wouldn’t let him. It was just a defence mechanism practiced over the many years he had to fend for himself. 

“If the topic is _my face_ I do.” He placed the whiskey glass hard on the living room table. 

_Okay, now he is definitely angry._

I got up and walked over to him. To get behind his wall of defence I needed to prove that I was there. That I listened to him and paid attention. I needed him to see that we weren’t on opposite sides. It was me and him against his insecurities. He had submitted to his own anxieties for too long now. I was going to put a stop to it. 

I’m not naïve. I didn’t think it was going to be easy, but hell if that stopped me from trying. I knew my partner felt insecure about many things, but the most prominent was his face and it was therefore the most obvious place to start. 

“Erik…” I tried to keep my voice calm and collected. “It wasn’t a dream, now was it?” A part of me wanted to say: _You lied to me!_ But what would that accomplish? He was already tense and defensive, and it would just make matters worse. My goal was to get behind his defences, to ultimately get behind his mask. 

Erik hesitated, and it was all the confirmation I needed. 

_So_ I had _seen Erik without mask._

It would take some time to get used to seeing his true face but I’m sure it would be fine. I’d do it for him. For the man so deeply embedded in my heart. 

I took a step forward and lifted my still bandaged left arm. I looked at the black signet ring that hadn’t left my finger since our lives got irreversibly entwined. I polished the flat black surface of the onyx with the thumb of my right hand. Erik gasped. I looked up to see panic and fear in his eyes. And then came the devastating sadness before his eyes left mine. His shoulders slumped and he turned to leave. His tone was bitter.

“Keep it. Or sell it if you like. I don’t want it anymore.”

_My God! He thought I was giving the ring back? No way! Absolutely no way!_

“Stop it right there!” A few hurried steps and I was in front of him. “There is no way in hell I’m selling our engagement ring. I love you! Don’t you see that by know? I. Love. You.”

Erik looked at me like I had grown a second head. I took a hold of his shoulder with my good hand. I wanted to shake some sense into him! Hadn’t I proved over and over again that I loved him? 

“Why is it so hard to believe that you’re loved?” My exclamation may seem a bit insensitive since I knew of his background. I knew why he reacted this way. But that wouldn’t stop me from challenging his behaviour. 

“Did you actually see my face?”

“Of course I did. The only thing I can’t wrap my head around is how that table ended up in it’s original position. I could have sworn that you moved it out of my reach.”

“I did.” He let out a sigh and ran a hand through his hair. “And then I moved it back in the hours before dawn.”

“…so I’d think it was all a dream.” I filled in and he nodded. I grabbed his elbow and led him to the sofa. We sat down and I took his hand in mine. 

“Tell me about what actually happened that night.”

His answer was reluctant. “What do you want to know?”

“Everything.”

He exhaled loudly. “When I heard your scream I bolted out of bed. I was in such a hurry that I… forgot the most important part of me.”

That was a point I didn’t agree on but I kept my mouth shut since encouraging him to open up was my priority. He closed his eyes and slowly shook his head. 

“I didn’t even realize my mistake until I re-entered my room and saw the mask on the nightstand. I froze on the spot praying to anyone or anything listening that I could undo the last hour. When my prayers weren’t answered I simply listened.”

My voice was barely audible. “To what?”

Yellow eyes met mine for a moment and a sad smile grazed his lips. “Listened for footsteps. I wouldn’t have held it against you, you know. If you’d decided to leave, right then and there. The more I thought about it the more the kiss we shared turned into a heartfelt goodbye. I replayed it over and over in my head while I stood there. Listening.” He swallowed loudly. “I clutched the ring you gave me, our engagement ring if you will, in my hand so tightly I’m surprised it didn’t leave a permanent mark. … After a while I sat down, or I rather must have since I woke up leaning against the wall. I had dreamt that I heard your footsteps. I had to peek into the living room to make sure you were still there.” 

I gripped his hand tighter, and the corner of his mouth lifted. 

“When the night was nearing it’s end I started growing hopeful. _What if_ it wasn’t a goodbye kiss? _What if_ there wouldn’t be any sound of footsteps tonight? _What if_ I could convince you it had all been a nightmare? Once the idea was born there was no stopping it. I got dressed and moved the table back without a sound.” He looked up at me. “It wasn’t up until you stopped asking about the nights events that I could breathe normally again.” He cleared his throat and sat up straight. “I’m sorry Raoul. Will you forgive me?”

“For what?”

“For forgetting my mask in the first place. I swear it won’t happen again.”

“No Erik. Have you learned nothing from this? The problem here isn’t your face but rather your anxiety. You may show your face anytime you like and I promise that won’t cause me to leave. I’ll forgive you for lying to me, but not for the mask since there’s nothing to forgive.”

His eyes welled, and he shook his head. But he smiled and I knew I was reaching him even if his words still promised to keep the mask in place. 

“I wouldn’t do that.”

“I know. But my dreams aren’t filled of footsteps. I dream of waking up next to you, cuddle up real close and fall back asleep again without any one of us having to worry about appearances. Or anything else really. I love you, and I dream of the day when you’ll feel completely relaxed around me. The only steps I’ll be taking will be those that bring us closer.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To eragon19 who "couldn't wait to see when Raoul brings up the mask again". And Memento_vitae who was right all along! It was indeed no dream. x) 
> 
> I hope you're all pleased with this chapter. It was a tough one to write.


	34. Blackmail and saviours

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you eragon19, Chainsawhand and Memento_vitae for your comments! :D
> 
> So I'm going away for Christmas. Future updates will probably come next year. To all of my readers: MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR! :D

* * *

“She tricked me. And now I’m torn between being very uncomfortable and oddly proud.”

Erik had just come home from his weekly lesson with Christine. I located my bookmark before tossing my book on the sofa. I stood up to greet him. 

A quick kiss. “So, what did she do?” 

Another kiss, this one a little longer. “She spoke about conflicts. About being calm and assertive and not backing down. I thought she was just building up confidence to confront some of the chorus girls… I didn’t think…” Erik sighed. “So of course I encouraged her to stand proud, be persistent and not concede. And perhaps… use just a little blackmail if needed.”

And yet another kiss. This one for good measure. “That was not very a very angelic thing to say. And then what happened?” I brushed kisses up along his neck effectively hiding my smile. 

“And then she asked me to show myself to her. And that she wouldn’t sing another note until I did.”

Well… hiding my smile became impossible after that. I simply couldn’t hold back the laughter bubbling up inside of me. Erik seemed torn between laughing and face-palming. “It suits me right. I get that.”

“What did you tell her? ‘Good job, but did you have to be such a quick learner?’”

“No. I panicked and said… ‘Eh, God is calling for me. I got to go.”

I laughed so hard that tears were forming in the corners of my eyes. “You’ve got to be kidding me! You do know that’s the oldest trick in the book right? Oh, how I wish I’d been there! Why didn’t you just say that angels can’t take physical form?”

“Told you. I panicked. And that’s precisely why I came to you, you’re good with excuses. Even though I knew you would mock me mercilessly.”

“You deserve it.”

“I do, don’t I.” Erik smiled and shook his head. “See, I need your help Raoul. I can’t very well show myself to her, and she should _never_ give up singing.”

“What do you expect me to say? ‘So Christine, my partner is very distressed over the fact that you won’t sing until you see him in person. Could you please be less of a teenager and back down? You know, listen more to what he means than what he says and all that.’”

Erik pulled me closer and caressed my cheek. “Even though that was probably the worst possible suggestion ever, I still cannot quite get over the delight at hearing you calling me _your partner_.” He held me close and I melted in his embrace. I’d found a slice of heaven. 

“I’ll help you. I’ll make something else up. Something a little less ‘I can’t wait to shag your angel senseless’ and a little more ‘Everyone loves hearing you sing’.”

“How does ‘you want to shag me’ have anything to do with this?”

“It doesn’t. It’s just constantly on my mind. I can’t wait to get this cast off. Than these clothes…”

“Hah! You flatter me Raoul.” Erik hugged me tighter to him. “You know we still have to be careful when your cast comes off.”

I groaned and mumbled something along the line of _being the first to die of sexual frustration_.

* * *

“Christine! Do you have a minute?” I found her close to her dressing room. 

She smiled and ushered me into her room, away from the prying eyes of the chorus girls. “Of course Raoul. What can I do for you?”

“I was wondering if you’d like to sing a duet with me?”

“I didn’t know you were a singer Raoul. What a delightful surprise. I’d love to sing with you! What song did you have in mind?” She smiled at me expectantly and gestured for me to sit down, while she took the seat opposite me. 

_Umm… well this wasn’t going according to plan. She was supposed to answer_ Regretfully I don’t sing anymore! _, or something equally dramatic. How else was I going to confront her about her blackmailing Erik?_

Therefore I had absolutely no song in mind. I must have looked like a cod fish while my mouth opened and closed silently many times over. I hate to admit that my first try at an eloquent response turned out to be: “You know… Messiah, right?”

Christine looked at me like I was one brick short of a full load. “Our Lord and saviour, the light of the world, the son of God? Yes, I may have heard of him.”

Embarrassed I let out a chuckle. “Hrm… yes… I was going for Messiah as in the musical masterpiece written by Handel.”

“Ah, yes! I have it here somewhere.” She got up and walked over to a large trunk. There she started digging through a huge pile of note sheets. “Oh, here it is! What did you have in mind?”

“The duet.”

_Please, please let there be a duet in there!_

She looked through the index and frowned. “The only duet I find is made for an alto and a tenor. Was that the one you had in mind?”

“Eh… Yes. I believe it’s within your range to sing the alto in that part. You’ll do it perfectly. Would you remind me of the title, I seem to have forgotten it.” Mentally, I patted my own shoulder for lying so smoothly.

“ _O death, where is thy sting_.”

…

…

_This is just not my day._

…

...

Christine sighed and put down the large book that was Handels Messiah. “Raoul. Why are you really here?”

_Busted._

“That obvious huh?”

“Well, if singing about death is your version of a romantic date, then there’s no wonder you’re still unmarried.”

“Point taken. I was just wondering… how you are doing? You seem distressed. Has something happened?”

She sat down in front of me again and started to wring her hands in her lap. “You’re right. I insulted a friend this morning. He left without even saying goodbye. And now I’m not sure if he’ll come back.”

_Yes! Finally my luck started to turn!_

“Has he ever left you before? This friend of yours?”

“No. But I don’t know how to ask for forgiveness. He’s not like Meg. When Meg and I’ve had big fights we make up by hugging and crying our eyes out. We’re never mad at each other for long. He’s… different. Not the hugging kind I guess.”

_I would have to disagree._

“Well then.” I rose from my seat sensing that this conversation was soon to be over. “Do what you do best. Sing him a song!” I started for her door, and then paused as an afterthought struck me. “But preferably not one about death. That might send mixed signals.” I winked at her and left to the sound of her warm laughter.

* * *

Now, how big was the chance that Erik wasn’t behind the large mirror in Christines dressing room overhearing our conversation? Not that big no.  
Would he mock me relentlessly about my question about Messiah? Yes, very much so. 

I turned the last corner of the winding paths down to Erik's humble abode and came face to face with the man himself. The smirk he wore told me that my earlier predictions had been correct. 

“You know…” I grabbed him by the collar and kissed him thoroughly before he could finish quoting me. He seemed content with that reaction as he chortled into the kiss and slid his fingers through my hair.

I broke the kiss. “I know.”

There was no mistaking the humour in his yellow eyes. “You deserve it.”

My turn to smile and shake my head at our antics. “I do, don’t I.”


	35. Olive oil and stars

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you eragon19, Lely, Archangel_Arri, EmilyLove and emmawicked for commenting! :3 Hope this chapter is to your liking. ^^
> 
> I was just wondering, where are my readers from, country-wise? Feel free to answer if you like. ^^
> 
> Lemons ahead! Be warned.

* * *

“Erik! Dinner’s ready.”

Two colourful plates stood before me. Huge piles of fruit and vegetables covered them completely. I had visited the market that day and was now anxious to share my bounty with Erik. 

_A touch of olive oil and it will be a culinary masterpiece._

I searched through Erik's cabinets and found the glass bottle I was looking for. The sight of the bottle was enough to set off an onslaught of memories. 

Memories of Erik using said oil as a lubricant before entering me with his finger. The mere thought made my breath hitch. It felt like an eternity since he’d last made love to me. My only comfort was that I’d endured the cast (and the abstinence that seem to come with it) for one and a half month already. Two more weeks and it would be over.

That didn’t stop my mind from wandering though. I was slowly undressing Erik for my minds eye, caressing every inch of skin as soon as it showed. I grasped his member in my hand and he groaned low in my ear. I didn’t have to look down to know that I was hard, both in and out of my little fantasy.

“That looks delicious Raoul.” I jumped as the very real Erik slid his arms around me. “Did I scare you, dear?” He smirked facetiously. 

“No, I just didn’t hear you approach.”

Erik pulled me back against his chest. “And here I wasn’t even trying.” I could feel his smile as he kissed up along my neck. “Penny for your thoughts, dear.”

“Well…” I held up the bottle of oil debating whether or not I should tell him. “Do you remember…” I lost track when Erik found the spot behind my ear that sent shivers throughout my body. Thankfully, Erik caught my drift.

“When we used that oil in our more amorous activities? Yes. You liked it didn’t you? I know I did.”

I grasped his hand and pulled it down to my hardening member. ”I liked it so much that the simply thinking about it makes my dick throb.”

Erik brushed his hand up and down along my erection. His other arm still pinned me to his chest. “Who would have known?” He licked up along the shell of my ear. “Who would have known that Raoul de Chagny wants to get his ass finger fucked by the Phantom?”

By that point I was panting. Erik's sensual hand movements and dirty choice of words had me melting into a puddle in no time. He reached forward and took the flask from my hands. Then he repeated the movements I’d seen him do only minutes earlier in my head. He poured a small amount of oil in his hand and coated the index finger of his opposing hand in it. He temped me with the glistening finger by pulling it back and fourth in the puddle of oil. “What do you want me to do to you Raoul? Tell me.”

This was probably very wrong, but I couldn’t seem to help myself. I wanted him. In so many ways. “I want you to explore me yet again. I want you to press that finger into me slowly and make me feel all the wondrous things that you coaxed out of me last time.”

Erik took a few deep breaths. “Okay Viscompte. This is how it’s going to go down.”

I loved hearing his baritone voice so close to my ear. Did he know what kind of effect his voice had on me? Probably. 

“Since you’re not fully healed yet…” I was just about to object when he continued. “… we’ll have to be careful. Bend over and place your good hand on the kitchen counter to brace yourself. And _don’t move_. I’ll please you as much as you want but as soon as you move I’ll stop. Have I made myself clear?”

_God, how I loved a sexy, confident Erik._

“Perfectly.” I got in position to prove just how willing I was. Erik chuckled and untied my pants. “Impatient are we?”

“Can you blame me?”

“Guess not.” Erik pulled my pants and undergarments down to my ankles where I stepped out of them. He moulded my butt in his hands, massaging and caressing his way down to my thighs. “Spread your legs.”

I did as I was told while I tried to calm my erratic breathing. He hadn’t touched me intimately in what felt like forever. My body hungered for his. 

He then bent down behind me and caressed my length lovingly. “You are drop dead gorgeous, Raoul. You are perfection incarnate." His nimble fingers explored my nether regions and I loved every second of it. 

“Now what do we have here?” His slick finger circled my hole. I shivered and jutted my butt out instinctively. 

“Raoul!” Erik's tone was stern and before I knew it he’d removed his hands from me. “I said _don’t move_. I will only do this to you if you _keep still_. That is the only was we can ensure that you wont hurt yourself further.”

“RightOf BadMy courseSorry.” My excuses came out in a jumbled mess. I took a deep breath and cleared my head enough to form a sentence. “I promise I’ll be still.” 

Erik let out a low chuckle and proceeded to probe my entrance. He’d reached the first joint of his index finger when he groaned. “You are so tight, Raoul. So deliciously tight. How does it feel? Do you want more?”

It felt so sinful to have his finger stretching my anus. He wriggled the finger just on the inside of my ring, and I couldn’t hold back the groan that had been trying to escape me ever since he first started impaling me. “Nnnngh, yeesss, Erik. More.”

“Then relax, dear. Relax and let me take care of you.”

I relaxed and felt him push his devious finger deeper into me. I let out a moan as the next joint slipped in. He free hand caressed my lower back in slow circles.

_Just a little more and his whole finger will be inside of me._

That thought alone made my cock twitch. I turned it over in my head, the thought of Erik filling me up, it was beyond doubt the sexiest thing imaginable. When he was knuckle deep into me, he started to slowly pull his finger out before pushing his way in again. In and out. In and out. It felt good, but it didn’t compare to the feeling of having him stretch me open. I voiced my opinion out loud and he kissed my backside in response. “So you want more? Hand me the bottle then.” I handed him the oil and went back to bracing myself against the counter. Before long he started to press two of his glorious fingers into my ass. That sinful feeling of him stretching my back door was back and I moaned shamelessly.

“Now, let’s see if I can make you squirm.” He twisted his fingers this way and that way, and although I liked his treatment it wasn’t the earthshattering feeling I’d experienced last time. I heard him mutter something like _hold on_ before he shoved his fingers even further up into me. I sighed happily.

And then he found what he was looking for. 

“Erik! There! Oh dear God.” The urge to rock back against his fingers was just about irresistible, but I had promised to keep still. With a tremendous amount of willpower I stood my ground.

“There we have it!” Erik shoved his fingers deep inside me, hitting that magical place again. It was magnificent. He wrapped his free arm around my hips to hold me steady. I panted and moaned while Erik pounded his fingers into me hard to brush my prostate. It wasn’t long before I felt the familiar tightening on my balls. “Erik! I’m close!”

“Come for me, Raoul.”

It was all the persuasion I needed. Screaming his name I toppled over the edge. All I could feel was Erik, and all I could see was stars. Erik groaned with me. Together we created the sound of a release long in coming.

* * *

I held by breath as Erik slowly pulled out of me. 

“I thought you couldn’t possibly get any tighter, and then you clenched around my fingers like your life depended on it.” He rose as I stood and stretched my arm. There weren’t any dents in the kitchen counter, though not for lack of trying mind you. I wouldn’t have been surprised if my adamant grip had resulted in five half-moon shaped dents. Erik kissed up along my shoulder and hugged me from behind. “Raoul, would you get more oil next time you visit the market?”

“Of course, but we do have at least half a bottle left.”

“Something tells me that it wont last long.”

_God I love this man!_


	36. Hideouts and smells

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, thank you for all the lovely comments!  
> Hugs to eragon19, emmawicked, chainsawhand, Lely, Leio_Rossi, Archangel_Arri, LUCY280, Amber and Trash_For_Ships! :D I can't believe I've got readers all over the world! :D That is absolutely amazing. xD
> 
> Thank you all for your continued support. :) 
> 
> PS. I started writing my masters thesis this semester, so my mind has been elsewhere. But hey, all good things come to she who waits!

* * *

What were we doing hiding behind the large gargoyle statues on the roof of the Opera? Eavesdropping and giggling like teenagers. 

“Oh Gaston my powder puff. My sweet sweet eyebrow brush.”

In all honesty, Erik had fetched me simply because he wanted me to see how happy our make up artist was with her little cellist. We hadn’t indented to stay up there for long, but then they’d started likening each other with things that were supposed to be romantic but really wasn’t. They were horribly far off. Let’s just say it made me and Erik look like Romeo and Juliet in comparison. 

“Oh Yvette. You are like a D minor!”

Erik whispered hastily: “What on earth is he thinking? How is that cute?”

I pressed myself closer to Erik behind the stone statue and leaned forward to better hear Gastons reply. 

“You are… umm… not so big but you sound very happy.”

That sent me end Erik into another fit of giggles and I had to bite my hand to keep quiet. Erik hid his face in his palms and made a pained whisper. “He even mixed up major and minor. What an incredible turn off.” 

Yvette seemed pleased though as she gave her suitor a peck on the lips. “Wow, that sounds amazing.”

Erik's commentary was muffled by his hands. “No, not amazing. Sad. A D minor sounds _sad_.”

“You are so sophisticated Gaston.” 

_Oh dear God._

I had to sneak my way into the Opera again before the pent up guffaw got the better of me.  


* * *

 

What was I doing among the rafters in the Operas ceiling?  
Smirking and doing my best to stay quiet. 

Inspired by the overly cute couple we’d recently spied on, I’d written Erik a note. Erik would be finished with Chritines voice lesson any minute now. I could picture him coming down one of the winding paths softly calling my name. He would find my neat note on the kitchen table.

 _‘Dearest Honeybunch_  
_So our cellist lost his note sheets but found his love._  
_Let’s see if you can find yours._  
_If you can find me before 4p.m. then I’ll cook dinner. If not, dinner’s on you. That should give you approximately half an hour. Think you know your Opera well enough to find me in that time?_

 _Kisses in inappropriate places, yours / Raoul_  
_PS. You are like a fermata; I’ll hold onto you just a little too long. (If you’ll find me that is…)_  
_But be warned, I am like a trombonist who’s on time; incredibly hard to find. ‘_

I snuck up to the rafters to a place I’d noticed weeks earlier. A huge pile of ropes that formed a nice seat. I snuggled up among the ropes and let out a sigh that quickly turned into a yawn. The prop-mound was surprisingly comfy…

* * *

Soft fingertips brushed along my cheek bringing me to conciseness again. I opened my eyes to find a smiling Erik who had crouched down in front of me.

“Good morning sleepyhead.” He leaned forward to place a tender kiss on my forehead. “I wish I could let you sleep a little longer, but then I wouldn’t be able to prove that you’re making us dinner tonight.” I felt rather than saw his smug smile. I didn’t mind though.

_I can get used to waking up like this._

I rose from my makeshift bed and stretched. “So you actually managed to find me in half an hour? I’m impressed. Since I thought I would be up there all night I figured I might as well get comfortable.” I shrugged and nudged him playfully with my hip. 

“Please!” Erik scoffed. “I found you in the first five minutes, but then I simply couldn’t bring myself to wake you. You look so cute when you sleep. So innocent.”

Then it was my turn to scoff. “Innocent?” I gripped the waistband of his pants and pulled him close. “I think we both know that is far from true.”

The mischievous glint in his yellow eyes was my only warning as he pressed his lips roughly to mine. 

_Aaahh… …heaven._  


* * *

What was Erik doing in the kitchen when I was the one in charge of dinner? Distracting me, mostly. He said that he’d enjoyed my playful game immensely and that he therefore wanted to help me with dinner. Sharing the prize and so on. Well, that was all bark and no bite. Or perhaps he though I was the prize and not the dinner, since he spent the majority of the time in the kitchen with his arms around me kissing up and down along my neck and breathing softly at the edge of my hairline.

“You smell so good Raoul. Have I ever told you that?”

“What? No similes? No _You smell like our last diva; drenched in perfume to cover up the stench of sweat_.”

Erik snorted. “She wasn’t that bad. Sure, the perfume could be a little much at times but Carlotta had better hygiene than all of the trumpet players put together.”

“Could be.” I nodded in acquiescence. “But that sadly doesn’t say much.”

“You on the other hand…” Erik was back to sniffing me. “…you smell like bubbly excitement, and calm satisfaction at the same time.” He placed a soft kiss behind my hear. “You smell like instant gratification and long term progress.” I leaned back and closed my eyes as he continued. “You smell like challenging development and childish diversions.” He kissed my earlobe and then whispered the words I’ve been longing to hear all day. “I love you Raoul.”

My answer came out in a breathy sigh. “I love you too Erik.”

It tickled as he smiled against my ear. “And if you take a deep breath…” I did as I was told. “… You’ll smell that it’s about time you moved the frying pan before we’ll have to eat coal tonight.” He chuckled at my jumpstart. He was right. The food in front of me had been neglected ever since he started seducing me.

I saved the most of our dinner. I wasn’t taking any blame for the uneatable parts though since he was the obvious culprit. 

I told him as much and he just winked at me saying _Fine, I’ll be whatever you want me to be_. 

The tease. 

Did he know that his overly confident and sexy smile put him right on top of my to-do list? Who was I kidding, he _turned into my to-do list_. 

Erik gripped my chin and held me close enough to feel his breath on my lips but not nearly as close as I would have liked. 

“Raoul, you are like an _Accelerando_ , my heart seems to speed up whenever you’re near.”

What was my rebellious stomach doing in answer to Erik's romantic gesture? Ruining the moment. A loud grumble could be heard from within me, resonating through my chest and finishing off in a small burp. 

Erik took in in stride. He threw his head back and laughed wholeheartedly. 

_Would he have reacted the same way a month ago? Would he have seen the humour in it? Or would he have shied away, scared off by my insensitive (although involuntary) reaction to his attempt at romance?_

I would never know, but as Erik nuzzled my neck yet again I knew that the long term progress he spoke about wasn’t really that far off.

“Let’s get you fed up dear.”

“In a moment. I do believe you were about to kiss me before we were so rudely interrupted.” He snickered, and I grinned. “And I wouldn’t want to miss that kiss for all the food in the world… …burnt or not.”

Erik slid his hand up along the back of my head and then pulled me into that long in coming kiss. His tongue invaded my mouth which emanated a deep groan from me. He sucked my upper lip into his mouth and carefully scraped it with his teeth. Not enough to hurt, but certainly enough to tease. I answered his endearments with my own, sucking on his tongue, moaning in pleasure and massaging his lips with mine. 

What was I doing before he started kissing me? I couldn’t remember. 

And I honestly didn’t care.


	37. Fulfilling Dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To all of my lovely readers; Thank you for taking the time to read, leave kudos and comment. It means so much!
> 
>  
> 
> I should really go to sleep now. 
> 
> Author over and out!

* * *

I woke up with a smile on my lips. For my minds eye Erik had just made sweet, sweet love to me. It was a deliciously sinful dream that I couldn’t wait to re-enact. I’d visited a doctor yesterday who’d helped me get the cast off. He took a look at my wrist and deemed it good enough to go without the cast. 

I hastened to do my morning chores before going in search for Erik. I found him in the living room playing the piano. His back was to me and I watched the muscles in his arms flex as he used the whole range of the piano to create the most wonderful sounds imaginable. 

_My word, would I ever stop marvelling at his talent?_

As much as I loved hearing him play, I wanted his talented fingers elsewhere. When the song ended I cleared my throat.

“Erik, can you spare a few minutes?”

“Always, Raoul. Did you have anything special in mi…”

He stopped mid sentence as he turned around and saw my state of undress. I hadn’t bothered to get dressed after my quick morning wash. I figured it would be completely unnecessary to wear the clothes for a total of two minutes. 

Erik's eyes roamed freely over my naked form. My member saluted the man who had pleased it more times than I could count. I smiled as his eyes once again met mine. 

“Something special in mind? Yes. As a mater of fact I did.”

“I can see that.” He glanced down once again. “It’s actually pretty hard to miss.”

“It’s pretty hard in other ways too.”

Erik chuckled darkly. “Come here…” He turned fully toward me and patted his lap. It was an invitation I could not resist. I straddled his lap, resting my shins on the piano bench on either side of him. 

Erik caressed me up along my thighs and over to my back. My head fell forward onto his shoulder and I could already feel my heart rate speed up. 

“You are absolutely gorgeous, Raoul. Whatever did I do to deserve such a nice surprise?”

“I dreamt about you. About us. About this.”

I kissed up along his neck finding his pulse and suckling on it. 

“You did?” Erik sounded amazed. He grasped my chin and turned my face to his. His smile was wide and his eyes were hopeful. “Tell me. What happened? What did I do to you to get you this hard?”

I closed the distance between us and kissed him. I teased his lower lip with the tip of my tongue and before I knew it he had grasped the back of my skull and was kissing me vigorously. I was so immersed in the kiss that I didn’t notice when Erik sneaked a hand between us. He grasped my member firmly and I broke our lip lock as I gasped. He used his other hand to explore my chest teasing my nipples whenever he brushed past. 

“Have I ever told you that you are sheer perfection, Raoul? There isn’t even a blemish upon your skin.” 

I was about to object when he started to pump the hand around my member up and down, and I had to concentrate on breathing. I did have some scars here and there, mostly from adventurous escapades in my youth, but they didn’t even come close to Erik's. Neither in amount nor magnitude, so I didn’t bother mentioning them. 

I stilled Erik's hand with my own and took deep breaths to calm down. “You need to stop that, or this will be over before it even started.”

Erik's hand stilled reluctantly. He kept his hand on my cock but he stopped guiding me along the fast route to completion. “Started what? What did I do to you, dear?”

“You stretched me open. You impaled me. And I loved every second of it.”

His chest rumbled with a low groan. “Mmmm, I like the sound of that.” He gathered a drop of glistening precum from my cockhead and held it up in front of me. “Look at this Raoul. Look at this sweet pearl. I wonder, does it taste just as sweet as it looks?” Erik's yellow eyes bewitched me. I opened my mouth and bent over to suck his finger into my mouth. Erik tssked and held the finger away from me. 

“No my dearest. It’s going help fulfil your fantasies.” He reached around me and rubbed my puckered entrance. My head fell back as I groaned shamelessly. Before long I could feel the tip of his finger push past my ring of muscles. Erik captured my next moan in his mouth as he kissed me with abandon.

Erik pushed and pulled his finger in deliciously languid strokes. I rocked back and fourth trying to take him in deeper. I licked around the shell of his ear and whispered a hopeful proposition. “As much as I love your digits I was hoping you’d fill me with more than just fingers.”

Erik inhaled sharply. “Are you sure?” He used his free hand to stroke my cheek and looked me dead in the eye. “It will be quite the stretch, are you sure you’re ready for this?” 

I smiled and pecked his lips briefly. “I am. I can’t wait for you to fill me properly.”

“We’ll have to warm you up first. Patience is a virtue.” He pulled the finger out of me and gripped the back of my thighs. “Hang on.” He stood and I wrapped around him reflexively. He took two tentative steps in the direction of his chamber before he had to readjust his grip. 

“You can put me down, Erik. I’m too heavy to be carried around.”

“Nonsense. I got the bed in place all by my self, I’ll be damned if I couldn’t carry my mate there to enjoy it.” He started moving again.

“Mate _and_ fiancé.” I grinned. 

“Two things I’d never thought I’d get.” Erik looked at me like I was the greatest treasure there was. His eyes always seemed to give me the best compliments. He lowered me unto the bed and I reached for his pants. 

“Wait, Raoul. If we are to do this, then we should do it slowly. I don’t want to hurt you. Wait here, I’ll be right back.”

Before I knew it he was back, oil in hand. 

_We should really keep the spare bottle in the bedroom._

I leaned back on my elbows and spread my legs wide. He was devouring me with his eyes again.

“See anything you like?” I smirked, loving his attention. 

“Anything? Everything!” He was over me in a heartbeat, kissing, nibbling and suckling his way from my collarbones all the way down to my to very rigid member. He sucked the head of my cock into his mouth as he filled me with his finger once again. The sight of his mouth around me sent shivers down my spine. 

One finger turned to two, and with a little coaxing on my part, two then turned to three. A new record for us as a couple as well as for my hole, but I knew I wanted something bigger. He scissored his fingers stretching my hole even more. It felt naughty and absolutely amazing. 

“More, more. Give me more!” 

“Ever so impatient, Raoul. You have to be careful with these things, you can’t just rush into this just because you’ve taken your cast off. 

“I’m not. I’m rushing into this because your fingers bring me closer to the edge. Fast! And I dreamt of us going off together.” 

The rumble in Erik's chest was close to a purr. “You have the most sinful dreams, Viscompte.”

A few minutes later and Erik deemed me ready. He started undoing his pants, and even though they hid the main attraction I still wanted all of him naked. When I told him as much, he smiled abashedly. He shed his clothes and I admired the view. “You look great, Erik. No wonder my attraction spikes whenever you touch me.”

He shook his head, but the smile he wore was genuine. “You never cease to surprise me, dearest.” He bent over me, taking his long length in hand. “Are you sure you’re ready for this?”

“Of course I am. Now fill me up, love.”

Some olive oil later and he was slowly pushing his way inside of me. Slowly. Agonisingly slow he inched his way in. It had been a good idea to stretch me thoroughly with his fingers first because he was well endowed. I loved the sight of Erik bent over me, biting his lip to keep himself in control while filling me up. 

Another inch and I groaned. “How much is left?”

Erik chuckled darkly and bent down to kiss me. “I’m barely past the head.”

“Oh.”

Erik latched onto my throat intent on giving me a hickey. He gave me time to adjust and I tried to relax. 

“More. It’s okay, I can take it.”

Erik grasped my shoulders as leverage and with a groan slid he pressed the rest of himself deep into my ass. Erik moaned and praised everything about me from the way my skin felt against his, to my bulging muscles and of course he also praised my tight and warm channel. 

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, just… give me a minute.”

“Raoul. Give the word and I’ll pull…”

“Don’t! … just give me a minute would you?”

“Right. Sorry. Take as long as you need.”

Deep breaths. It was unlike anything I’d ever experienced. He stretched my ring and filled me up to the very brim. My hands lazily caressed his sides. I liked the feel of him underneath my fingertips. Smooth, with the occasional scar or birthmark. It was the texture of Erik. _My_ Erik. 

Gradually I started relaxing around him.  
“Okay. Go ahead.” 

Erik watched me with uncertain eyes but started to pull out slowly. He pulled halfway out before going in again. He repeated the movement several times before taking longer strokes. He was frowning and biting his lips.

“Erik, is something wrong?”

“No, I just…” Worried golden eyes met mine. “I don’t want to be the only one enjoying myself. My body is rebellious and thrives in the pleasure you give me. But I shouldn’t. _You’re_ supposed to be the one to come. _I’m_ supposed to please _you_. And right now you’re not looking too thrilled.”

Before I had time to contradict him he cut me off. “Raoul. Don’t think about me. If this isn’t what you thought it would be then I can easily pull out and give you a blowjob instead. In fact, we don’t have to talk about it ever again if you don’t want to.”

I placed a hand on his bare cheek. “Erik. Calm down. Yes. It was unpleasant there for a short while, but I got over it. It’s starting to feel nice now.”

Erik seemed unconvinced. 

“Now, are you just going to lie there, or are you going to find that spot that make me scream your name on the top of my lungs?”

I could see the tug at the corner of his mouth and he started moving again. It felt better with each stroke. He rocked me harder and I groaned. I caressed his strong back as our tongues battled over dominance in a fierce kiss. Erik took me faster and the moans were soon pounded out of me. He then took a hold of my thighs and lifted them to get even deeper into me. He twisted his hips and a jolt of pleasure was sent throughout my nervous system. He’d found what he was looking for. 

I gasped for air as he pounded the spot yet again. I couldn’t even seem to get enough air to tell him that his search was over. It seemed I didn’t need to though. Once Erik looked up and saw my eyes, the triumphant smile that spread across his face told me he knew. He filled me again and again, a little harder each time. Always hitting my prostate with precise accuracy. Before long I was clawing at the bed sheets, screaming his name as I felt the tension build up. 

“I love you, Raoul!” 

I opened my eyes, not really aware that I’d closed them in the first place, and admired the man of my dreams. The sight of his strong body that pumped relentlessly into me was the final straw. I came hard, blessings of deities and musicians and phantoms all rolled into one. Erik came with me, emptying himself while deeply embedded in my ass. 

He slumped down on top of me while we both fought to catch our breaths. I held him in my arms. We took a few minutes to return to earth again.

“Don’t even think about it.” I mumbled quietly.

“What?” He sounded almost as close to falling asleep as I was. 

“Composing. After this. You may compose later. Right now, you’re not going anywhere.” I tightened my hold to prove my point and Erik snorted. 

“As if I’m able to. No, I’ll stay here and listen to you breaths as you fall asleep. And if I’m lucky I might get to listen to you when you wake up. Listen to and re-enact your latest dreams.”


	38. Worth protecting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To 1_Heluva_Butler, Trash_For_Ships, Memento_vitae. Thank you for the comments! :D
> 
> And especially to eragon19 and OpenEyes...
> 
> And to my new Beta All_Terrain_Nerd! This chapter wouldn't be the same without you!

* * *

As it turned out, _I_ was the one listening to Erik's breaths as _he_ fell asleep. Not that I minded in the least. He relaxed completely on top of me, and even if it probably would have been more comfortable to have him sleep beside me, I had no urge to shove him off. 

He looked younger as he slept. Carefree, without any tensions or frowns. I laid there for a long time just watching him. I was tired and could easily have fallen asleep, but simply studying his relaxed features was worth every second I could stay awake. 

He mumbled something incoherent and slowly blinked his eyes opened. When he focused in on me, his first reaction was to smile. It made my heart thud faster in my chest. It was a smile that showed how happy he was to be mine. I could have lived in that moment forever. Perhaps it wouldn’t have been a bad idea to stop time right there considering what came next. 

Erik's eyes widened briefly and he flinched back. His hand flew to his mask. It was, of course, still in place, and he sighed in relief. But the tension was back. He was back to being guarded. He met my gaze and I frowned disapprovingly. 

Erik cast his eyes down and slid off of me. I stopped him before he could slide out of bed completely. 

“Is it the mask?” I asked carefully.

“Isn’t it always?” His tone was bitter and he still wouldn’t meet my eyes.

“Erik,” I waited until he looked up on me. “I want you to take the mask off.”

He just shook his head. “No you don’t.”

“I do,” I insisted.

“Raoul!” He snapped at me in anger. 

I knew he didn’t mean it though. Anger was just his way of handling frightening situations.

I raised an eyebrow and drew my mouth to a thin line, questioning his outburst. He didn’t want to scare me off, so I wouldn’t let him. 

He frowned even deeper and started to rise from the bed. I grasped his arm to stop him yet again. 

“Tell me, Erik. What is going through that head of yours?”

“That you don’t know what you’re getting yourself into.”

“I _have_ seen you, you know.” I countered.

“In the dead of night, in a barely lit room. Raoul,” his yellow eyes softened a little, “I don’t want to put you through that again. Once was enough.”

“I don’t get it Erik. I’ve seen you. I love you. I haven’t left. What more is it to it?”

“If…” he started slowly but trailed off. He laid on his back, looking up at the ceiling, wringing his hands. It took him quite some time to formulate the rest of the sentence, but I was in no hurry. There were times (especially during our lovemaking) when I was impatient, but then there were other times when I had all the patience in the world. 

“If you were to have a nightmare...” He started slowly “… then I would want to be there to console you. To hold you, and tell you it was going to be alright. That I loved you, and that I wouldn’t let anything happen to you. That I would keep you safe.”

I slowly nodded, but I didn’t interrupt since I wanted him to continue. 

I wasn’t plagued by nightmares. I’d never been. Not even as a child. I hadn’t even believed in monsters under the bed as many kids did. I figured Erik wasn’t as lucky though. To be feared, hated, and beaten left scars far deeper than any of the skin. So in all honesty, it wasn’t surprising that one of the ways he wanted to show his love for me was by being the caring protector that he himself needed. That he’d probably hoped and wished for in many of those dark hours of his past. That he’d prayed for would come and help him, or at least hold him until he could fall back asleep again. 

How I wished I could have been there to save him. A small act done in kindness many years ago could have saved him so much pain. It could have given him the chance to sleep without nightmares.

Erik swallowed and continued. “But I fear that you wouldn’t let me do that. That you would push my hands off and tell me to stay away.”

“Why?”

Erik turned his head to look at me. His pained whisper was barely audible. “Because I’d be the source of said nightmare.”

I slowly shook my head. “You don’t scare me.”

“I’d never forgive myself if I did.”

We laid there studying each other. He was open and honest. He wanted me to see it the way he did, and I was getting there, slowly. He probably thought he was explaining his behaviour so I wouldn’t question his actions anymore. But in actuality, I wanted to understand his fears so that I knew how to fight them. 

“And I’d never forgive myself if I let you live in fear of scaring me away. I want to be your rock, Erik. I want to be the one you can lean on when all else seem to fall apart. I want to help you grow.”

A smile tugged at the corners of his lips. “I _am_ growing, dear. Before I met you, music was the only light in my world. I was obsessed with it, just as I was obsessed with checking the traps every day to make sure everything was still in working order and that no one was creeping up on me. I thought everyone was out to get me, and my smiles were small and few in between. Some mornings, I only get out of bed because the thought of someone sneaking up on me is worse than slowly fading away into nothingness.”

I caught his hand and encased it in my own. I pressed it tightly to my pounding heart and swallowed thickly. I didn’t say anything out of fear of my voice breaking. Erik huddled closer to me. 

“But then I met you. You were the first good thing I obsessed over, aside from my music that is. As you took up more and more of my thoughts, my life took a new turn. I talk, and play, and laugh on regular basis. I get out of bed early to surprise you with breakfast, and I find myself daydreaming of our kisses so many times a day that I’m surprised my face isn’t stuck with a permanent smile. You’ve helped me more than any god ever has. I could spend my whole life showing you my gratitude, and it still wouldn’t be enough. And after we die… well I honestly don’t think you’re going to hell, Raoul. You’re too good for that. But if the cynical God who rules this world doesn’t see that and send us both down there, then I promise you I will do everything within my power to protect you.” His eyes shone with such determination. He’d obviously been thinking about this for quite some time.

Large tears fled down my cheeks and I shook my head in protest. 

I wouldn't let him do that. Knowing he’d suffer in my place would break me more than anything hell had to offer.

He lifted his other hand to slowly run his fingers down my cheek. He brushed away my tears. “Don’t cry, Raoul. That is a long way away. We still have many days and nights before that come to pass. Days and nights I’d like to spend with the love of my life. With the light of my life.”

I opened his hand and pressed a kiss to his palm. I’d be his light for as long as he wanted me to.

“Have you stopped checking your traps?”

“No.” Erik smiled. “They’re important, now more than ever. Because now, they guard something truly worth protecting.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OpenEyes and eragon19, you wanted more 'mask-drama'. Did you like it? What more would you like?


	39. Fathers and promises

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg, 58 people get mail every time I update! O.O That... is unbelievable. 
> 
> To all of you who left me comments; thank you! Excuse me for leaving my notes in the chapter when I published it. That was a mistake. Thanks for pointing it out. 
> 
> And of lots of praise to my beta All_Terrain_Nerd!
> 
> On to the next chapter!

* * *

_Hrmpf… two months and I have forgotten almost everything that Erik taught me._

I sat behind Erik’s piano trying to remember the song he tried to teach me a small eternity ago. I only remembered bits and pieces. It was fitting the fragments together without halting that was the problem at hand. I made it to the finishing chord and sighed. Half an hour. Enough practice for one day. 

_At this pace, I’ll be retired before I get to see those last three chimneys._

I swung around on the chair intending to go look for Erik. It was quickly done as he was right behind me, lounging on the sofa. 

“Just how long have you been there?”

I didn’t hear him come in, but I wasn’t surprised. That man could best a shadow in a battle of silence. 

He shrugged and smiled. “Long enough.”

I cringed. “Sorry you had to hear that.”

“Don’t be. We all need to practice. May I help you?”

“As long as you don’t expect some kind of miracle.”

“I won’t. Now,” he sat down next to me as I scooted over on the small piano stool. “Place your hands like this. Use _all_ of your fingers. That way you don’t have to move them as much, causing all those unnecessary pauses.”

I tried playing it again a few more times before I gave up. 

“Would you play it to me, Erik? To refresh my memory of what its supposed to sound like?”

“Of course.” His hands flew over the keys. It was flawless, controlled, and… fine. 

Once he finished he tilted his head and gave me a sideways smile. “That is how it was written. And this is how I would have played it.” His hands flew over the keys once again, in a faster tempo this time. Even though he’d quickened the pace he managed to squeeze in far more notes in between the original ones. He had all the keys at his disposal and didn’t let them forget it. It was mesmerizing. 

Once Erik finished he looked up at me and let out a snigger. I was sitting there, eyes wide, with the biggest smile on my face. 

“That was… absolutely incredible! Do that again. The thing you did… over here.”

I pressed some of the black keys in front of me, trying to mimic Erik’s fluent movements and failed miserably. 

Erik laughed louder. “What do you mean ‘over there’? You make no sense Raoul.”

“You did something really remarkable over here,” I placed his hand on the right keys as if it would help his memory, “where you changed the rhythm somehow.” I placed my hand on top of his and tried to play the notes again. It sounded horribly off tune, but that didn’t stop me since it made Erik laugh even harder. Tears was forming in his eyes as he chortled. 

“Raoul, you’re cute when you’re frustrated.”

I raised an eyebrow but couldn’t fight the grin that showed off my pearly whites. Erik caught my hand in his and lifted it to press a kiss on the back. He then started playing the song once again, instructing me to break in whenever he played ‘the thing’. Half a minute later, and I shouted out in triumph. 

“There! You did it again!”

“Ah, you mean this?” His right hand flew effortlessly over the keys once again. “It’s called a _hemiola_. I play three beats in the time it takes to play two. And then I move my fingers like this.” He showed me once again, but slower this time. “Try it,” he encouraged me.

After a few failed attempts, he placed his hand over mine and played it with me. It helped immensely. 

“There you go, Raoul. You’ve got it. You’re a quick learner. It took me far longer to get the hang of it. I had to ask my father to play it to me at least twenty times before I got it right.”

I looked up at him. “So your father’s the one who taught you to play the piano?”

He nodded in acquiescence. “Yes, he was a musician. He taught me to read sheet music, to play the piano and… he made me see the beauty in it.” Erik smiled at the nostalgia. Erik talking about his past was a rare sight. He’d only mentioned his time before the Opera once or twice before. But his past was a part of him, and knowing his past would help me to understand the man he is today. 

“What was he like?”

“My father? He was… kind. He was patient and honest. He always answered me when I had questions, and he spoke about everything with ease. And when I say everything, I truly mean everything. I was very inquisitive as a child, and my father took the time to answer all of my questions, no matter how insignificant they seemed. He saw what others didn’t.” Erik lifted his hand to his mask. “And he didn’t see things as others did.”

“He seems far more understanding than mine. My father seems to be under the impression that he’s always right. He’s always talking and bragging. Loudly. He’s never truly listened. At least not to me. So when I wanted answers, I asked Mother. Or any of the staff. They were always very nice to me, but I guess that’s part of their job.”

“Or it could have something to do with your instinctual charm.”

“Pfft, who’s the charming one now, eh?” I nudged him playfully. 

“Has your father ever mentioned Christine again? He did seem so very proud when he set you up for the dinner date.”

“Ever mentioned?” I scoffed. “He’s boasting non stop about finding me a wife.”

“But you’re not married.”

“I know, but he basically sees us as married already. He’s given me a break though, ever since Philippe’s upcoming marriage took centre stage. By the way, would you accompany me to his wedding? Be my date perhaps?” I winked at him.

“Hah! And scare away the rest of the guests? How would you introduce me?” Erik altered his voice in a mocking imitation of me. “Hello everyone, this in my fiancé, you may have heard of him, he’s the one haunting the Opera Populaire.” He fluttered his eyelashes and flashed a toothy grin.

“Haha! I don’t sound like that!”

“Oh, but you do! The difference is that the smile looks rather appealing on you.” He used his fingers to brush my chin as he tilted my face to his for a kiss. He moaned as our lips came into contact. A few seconds of pure bliss. 

“Well then, Erik,” I fluttered my eyelashes exaggeratedly, “if I can create some way for you to cover your blemishes, would you do me the honour of accompanying me to the wedding?” 

Erik grumbled and frowned, but he didn’t say no. A little more coaxing was needed from my part. “Please, Erik. If you do this for me, I promise to do something for you.”

A dangerous gleam was forming in his yellow eyes. “Really? Would you promise to… follow my instructions… if I were to comply?”

_Okay, he definitely had something in mind. I actually didn’t think he would have something planned already. I thought he would waste his wish on something that he didn't need to coax me into, like having sex with me again. In fact, I hoped he would wish for that, but that devious man wants something else._

_Do I dare to say yes to something when I don’t even know what it is?_

I really wanted Erik to be at my side at my brother’s wedding. Besides, a part of me was very curious about his plans involving me. 

“Yes.”

Erik took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Fine. If you can come up with a way to guard my face without raising suspicion, I’ll accompany you to the wedding.”

He turned around and rose from the stool. 

_Would he actually leave me hanging?_

“And? What about my end of the deal? What will you have me do, Erik?”

Erik gave me a sly sideways smile. “All in due time, dear. All in due time.”

_Apparently so._


	40. Good news and titles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To eragon19, Memento_vitae, OpenEyes and ArchonX. Thank you for all the lovely comments!
> 
> And a huge thanks to my beta, All_Terrain_Nerd. It wouldn't be the same without you!
> 
> Hugs to all of you!

* * *

“Erik?” I ran the last bit through the tunnels down to our home. “Erik!?”

He came out of his study and I could see he was on high alert, in case of any danger. When he saw my wide grin, the tension dissipated from him. I rushed over to him and hugged him tightly. 

“I’ve got so much good news. I don’t even know where to start. Now, you only need to shag me for this day to go down in history as the best day ever!”

Erik chuckled and hugged me back. “Well, this is a surprise. Tell me what happened. What did y-” I cut him off by kissing him roughly. I slid my tongue into his mouth and savoured the tastes and the smells that were so uniquely Erik. 

“Mmmng…” Erik tried to talk yet again. But the attempt was half hearted and as I stuck my tongue down his throat, he soon gave up in favour of kissing me. 

A long make out session later, (in which he had pressed me up against the wall and groped me until I was sure I’d have his handprints on my ass), we finally broke apart for air. 

“What do you,” Erik panted, “mean by good news?”

I smiled and leaned my head back against the wall. “Well first of all, that was one mind blowing kiss.”

“Then let me rephrase that: would you tell me the good news that I don’t know already?” Erik caught my left hand and lifted if to kiss the inside of my wrist. It sent shivers down my spine. He then proceeded to kiss our engagement ring. 

_Was the sensual man in front of me really mine?_

I smiled at him. He deserved all the good news that came his way. “Do you remember the old Compte from Provence? He’s decided to become the Opera’s patron!”

“That is indeed great news. The Opera can never have too many patrons.”

“Also, I’ve come up with a way to hide your face at the wedding.”

“How?”

I mimicked Erik’s baritone voice, “All in due time, dear. All in due time.”

He snorted and rolled his eyes. “Any more good news?”

“Word on the street is that everyone is looking forward to the next show. And not just any show. They want more from _you_. A passionate drama with a happy ending is what the audience craves. I’ve had countless people ask me where I found the mysterious and wonderful composer, and when he’ll sell us our next piece. They, both the crew and the people of Paris, want to hear more from _you_.”

Erik stood there gaping. Dumbfounded. He then smiled abashedly and scratched the back of his head. “Well… it did turn out okay in the end.”

“ _Okay_? It was marvellous!” I kissed him sweetly on the lips. “And it was for me.”

Erik nodded, and we stayed like that for a few minutes. Simply enjoying the shared breaths. 

“I have actually already started writing some pieces. It’s not finished yet. Far from it, but it’s a start.”

“Really? That’s probably the second best thing today. The first being that kiss.”

Erik snickered. “Well I’ve written most of the orchestra’s part. I haven’t really gotten to the lyrics just yet. They barely have titles.”

“Barely? What are they called?”

Erik blushed. The uncovered half of his face was turning a lovely shade of pink. “Well… I’m not very imaginative when it comes to titles. … I guess I usually name the pieces of the first thing that comes to mind. It’s no matter, really. They’re just working titles.”

Fine. If he wouldn’t tell me, I would have to find out for myself.

I looked over Erik’s shoulder toward the entrance to the caves and projected an air of concern.

“Who’s that?”

Erik quickly turned around, and I took the opportunity to dash into his study, giggling like a schoolboy. 

I found the neatly arranged piles in an instant. The heading on the top page, written in Erik’s immaculate handwriting, proudly proclaimed _Raoul no. 4_. The piece he’d been working on when I’d stormed the lair a few minutes earlier was called _Raoul no. 11_.

_I’m sensing a theme here._

I thumbed though the huge pile of note sheets, careful not to disrupt the order. My smile grew in size each time I saw another piece marked with my name. I could hear Erik shuffling his feet behind me.

“Don’t let it get to your head. It’s just working titles.”

“So you’ve said, and it’s too late, Erik. I feel like a star. And it seems like I’ve got a fan.” I turned around. My smile was rivalling that of the Cheshire cat. “And not just any fan, but a _fan-tom_.”

He cracked up. “See, Raoul? I’m laughing at that horrid joke of yours. If this isn’t love, then I don’t know what is.”

“Well,” I grasped his shirt and pulled him closer, “writing insane amounts of music in my honour might also qualify for that. Then again, there are other more physical ways that you might want to try, too.”

Erik lowered his voice into a seductive purr. “Is that so? Then how would you like me to show my love for you, dearest?”

“By undressing me, and kissing me everywhere, and by letting me touch you.”

“It will be my pleasure.”  


* * *

We tumbled into the bedroom and fell onto the bed in a tangle of limbs and halfway torn off shirts. Erik bit onto my collarbone and I groaned loudly. 

He kissed the underside of my jaw. “Now, _that_ is the sound of Raoul. The best Raoul there is.”

I flipped us over so I was on top, and I tugged his pants off in a quick motion. These last months had given me plenty of opportunities to practice getting Erik undressed quickly, and I was close to an expert. In record speed, I had a half naked phantom sprawled out on the bed in front of me. I opened the remaining two buttons of his shirt and spread my fingers wide as I tried to caress as much of him as possible. I slid my hands down his chest and over his hips. He leaned up on his elbows, looking at me with the cocky grin that just made me want to ride him into oblivion. 

I grasped his rigid length in my hand, enjoying the feel of his warm, heavy member. 

“Nnnghh,” Erik groaned wordlessly.

“Look at me, love.” 

He looked up and I flashed him a brief smile before going down on his cock. I rolled my tongue around the head before taking him in deeper. I took him in far longer than I ever had before, but luckily, I felt no urge to gag. Erik’s moans grew in volume. As I retreated I hollowed my cheeks the best I could to make it as tight as possible. 

“Aaaahhh! Oh, god. It feels like you’re trying to suck the cum right out of me.”

“Whoever said that wasn’t my intention?” I winked at him and went back to work. Erik was writhing and thrashing under me. 

“God Raoul. Yes! More, please more!”

I repeated the movement time and time again. It was a gorgeous sight: Erik under me, with his mouth hanging open and his eyes hungrier than ever. 

“Raoul! I’m close. If you continue that any longer I’ll…. Aaaahhh.”

I hummed low around his length and started another one of those deliciously tight upstrokes. That was all it took for Erik to reach for the stars. He pushed himself deeper into me and fell back against the bed.

“Yes, Raoul! Yeeessss!” He emptied himself inside me in short bursts. I held still as the slightly salty cum coated my tongue. I carefully slid off and swallowed all of it. I was getting better and better at not spilling. 

I decided Erik could use a human blanket, crawled on top of him and melted into his embrace. I listened to his pants and his fast beating heart. It made me so proud to know that I was the one who did this to him.

I reassured Erik that he didn’t need to please me, and that I was perfectly content exactly where I was. 

“You sure?”

“Yes, very.”

“Because I don’t want you to feel left out-”

“Erik,” I interrupted.

“Yes?”

“Shut up.”

Erik snickered. He then turned my face to his and mouthed _I love you_. 

I kissed him sweetly, “I love you too, Erik. And there’s nothing I value higher then the sound of my name shouted in ecstasy as you loose control. You. Are. Addictive.”

The pure joy that shone in his yellow eyes took my breath away. 

Minutes passed as we shared smiles, caresses and breaths. I could feel Erik’s fingers twitch against my back, and then I heard him humming. It was barely audible. He didn’t seem aware that he was doing it himself. 

“What are you playing on me, Erik?”

He startled as my voice broke the blanket of silence we’d wrapped ourselves in. Then he blushed bashfully. 

“It’ll be the main theme. _Raoul no. 12_.”

* * *


	41. The wedding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To eragon19 (Who writes great porn, btw! Look it up!), backfromthedead91, Trash_For_Ships and Miemoe. Thank you for your continued support! 
> 
> And a special thanks to Memento_vitae for ideas. ;)
> 
> And as always, a hug to my lovely beta All_Terrain_Nerd!

* * *

“Here,” I put the basket down on the living room table, “we’ve got everything we need to cover you up. The wedding is two days from now.” 

Erik looked up from the book he’d been reading. “What have you come up with?” 

I handed him a white and golden hand fan. With a flick of his wrist, he flicked it open. It was practically see through, but decisively the prettiest accessory I’d seen in ages. I couldn’t help but buy it to prank Erik.

Erik lifted an eyebrow. “You’ve got to be kidding me…”

That cracked my serious façade. “Yes, love, I am. But you must admit that you would have been the sweetest phantom there, behind this seductive little hand fan.” 

Erik snorted. “I’ll be the _only_ phantom there.”

“You’re right. So you’ll be the sweetest phantom anyhow.” I winked at him. “No, but seriously, this is what I had in mind.” I picked up lots of bandages from the basket. “You, love, are turning into a hero. We’re going to pretend that the esteemed composer Chambon got into a fight near the border with some stray Germans, and that your face got badly hurt in the process.” I smiled at him. “But don’t you worry, you fought them off and saved France.”

“Right.” Erik’s hands were fidgeting nervously in his lap. “Did you get anything to make the bandage stay in place?”

“Yeah, I got some safety pins. And some plaster of Paris if you wanted it to _really_ stay put.”

Erik put my purchases back in the basket and picked it up, “Thank you. I’ll try it out at once.”

“Sure, why not?” I started for his bedroom.

“Raoul, I’d prefer to do this alone.”

“Erik, let me help. I’ve seen you and-”

He interrupted me, “You seem to live in some kind of delusion where I’m actually handsome, and I don’t want to risk changing that.”

I took a deep breath to retort.

“Please, Raoul. Not now. It’s hard enough as it is to leave my mask behind.”

I sighed deeply and nodded. 

_One step at the time._

* * *

Erik came out of his room half an hour later. The bandage was wrapped around the top of his head and the scarred half of his face. It covered one eye and went all the way down under his chin. 

“So, how do I look?” Erik spun around, “It was hard to get the safety pins in place.”

He’d done an admirable job covering himself up, but the largest one of his boils, the one covering part of his cheek still peeked out in between the layers of bandage. 

“You look great, love.”

I got up from the sofa and walked over to him. I leaned in close and pressed an open mouthed kiss to the red, mottled skin. I heard Erik inhale sharply as he froze. I wrapped my arms around him to hold him close as I repeated the kiss, slower this time. His breath hitched, and I could feel him start to shake in my arms, as I kissed him over and over again.

“I love you,” I whispered against his cheek. I pressed a kiss to his lips. His visible eye was squeezed shut, and there was a steady stream of tears coming down his uncovered cheek. I hugged him tighter as his body shook with silent sobs. I don’t know for how long we stood there, me whispering reassurances, and Erik clutching me like I was the only thing holding him to this world. 

When he’d calmed down, he looked at me with utter love and devotion. He swallowed, and opened his mouth to speak, but all that came out was a pained sob. It was okay though. I knew what he wanted to say. He was grateful, but couldn’t find the words to express it. I nodded at him. 

_There are times when words are redundant._

* * *

“Are you sure I’m invited?”

“Of course you are. All of the Paris nobles are invited, and they always bring extras. You, my love, are my good friend and a patron of the arts. You’ll fit right in.”

“Have you asked Christine to come along with you? Your father probably expects you to bring her along as your date.”

 _But of course! My father_ would _want me to bring Christine! Why hadn’t I thought of that?_

Erik read my embarrassed expression like an open book. “Her practice should have ended ten minutes ago, so she’s probably in her dressing room by now.”

“Thanks!” I hurried toward the tunnels leading to Christine.

“And you should probably take her dress shopping right away if she says yes,” Erik called after me, “she hasn’t got any dress fit for attending a wedding.”

* * *

A few days later and we were on our way to the church. I was just about to help Christine up into the carriage when Erik, dressed as Monsieur Chambon, joined us. This time, the bandages were covering him perfectly. 

“Ah, Christine, may I introduce you to a friend of mine. This is Monsieur Chambon, who’s the amazing composer behind our last successful masterpiece.”

Christine was dressed in a light blue dress of the latest Parisian fashion that I had bought her two days earlier. With puff sleeves, a high neckline, a wide skirt, and a corset to emphasize her slim waist, she was truly a beauty.

“It’s a pleasure seeing you, Monsieur. Your work is truly marvellous!”

“The pleasure is all mine, Mademoiselle. You are beyond doubt the best soprano I’ve had the pleasure of encountering.”

_Wait, what was that? Oh right. Erik altered his voice so Christine wouldn’t recognise him._

Christine curtsied politely. “Thank you most kindly, Monsieur! Will you be attending the wedding, too?”

Erik nodded in agreement. 

“How wonderful! Then I can ask you all these questions I have about my character.” She looped her hand through Erik’s arm.

* * *

Erik and Christine chatted about the Opera and the upcoming pieces for most of the way to the mansion.

I didn’t interrupt since I knew how much it meant for Erik to finally be able to speak with Christine in person. Sure, they had known each other for years, but she’d always known him as an angel and he didn’t want to change that. He’d confided in me that a part of him wanted her to see him as a man though. My love for him had given him hope that perhaps others could learn to like him as a person. And by others, he meant Christine. 

* * *

It seemed as though half of Paris was attending my big brother’s wedding. I slipped through the crowds, introducing Christine, picking up rumours, and did some small talking with the guests. 

“Raoul! Who is this beauty by your side? She’s a sight for sore eyes; I thought you’d never bring her around the mansion!”

I found myself sighing as my father’s booming voice closed in on us. 

To Christine he added, “But I guess my son wanted to keep you all to himself, eh?” He tried to produce a charming smile, but it came out more like a leer. 

Christine giggled sweetly, clinging a little tighter onto my arm. 

“Father,” I gave him a tired smile, “I believe you’ve met Mademoiselle Christine Daae.”

_Since you were the one who forced me to date her in the first place._

“I am sorry to interrupt, Monsieur le Viscompte, but I do believe the ceremony is about to start.” Erik’s altered, but still smooth voice was like a blessing from above. 

“Thank you, Monsieur Chambon.” I steered Christine off in the direction of the Chapel, while mouthing _I owe you one_ to Erik. He winked at me. 

* * *

The wedding was traditional. I sat at the front of the church with Christine on my right side and Erik to my left. I figured the seating closest to the wall would be most to his liking. I had spoken to the priest beforehand, giving him a quote from Shakespeare since I knew how much my brother liked the master. It was for my brother’s sake, but not entirely. 

The priest spoke about the beauty of Celine’s and Philippe’s souls and then spoke the words I’d been waiting for. Careful not to draw any attention, I snuck my left hand down to find Erik’s. Fingers laced together, eyes locked, I mouthed along with the priest’s words. 

“Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind. And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.” 

He didn’t say anything but Erik’s expression told me everything I needed to know. Amazement. Hope. And pure, unrestricted happiness.


	42. A poor replacement

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, my master thesis is coming along nicely, but that also means I haven't been able to write as much as I usually do this month. It'll be hectic for another month or so, just so you know. 
> 
> Thank you for all the comments! That make my day. And I do keep your suggestions in mind. :) I appreciate them. Thanks to eragon19, Memento_Vitae, DKK5, WorriarTiger, ardenshipsbullshit, and 1_Heluva_Butler. 
> 
> PS. Laughed so hard at your last comment 1_Heluva_Butler. I read it just as I was about to post this chapter. ;) 
> 
> A huge hug to my beta All_Terrain_Nerd who reads my mind and translates it into english. XD

* * *

“So, Raoul,” Erik approached me carrying a small pouch, “I’ve been thinking.” He frowned and wouldn’t meet my eyes. 

“About what?” I hopped up from the piano stool and walked over to him.

“Hold out your hands.”

I did as I was told and he emptied the contents of the pouch in my awaiting palms. With a metallic clang, out fell a plethora of rings. I approximated there to be at least ten to fifteen of them. Some in gold, others in silver, and all had glistening gems or beautiful signets. 

“What’s this for?” I looked up at Erik who finally met my eyes.

“Do you like them? Do you want any of them? Or all of them; they’re yours if you like.” He scratched the back of his head and shrugged, implying that this wasn’t a big deal, but his voice betrayed his apprehension. 

_Wait, what? Why is he giving me rings? Is this some kid of hint that he wants to get married? That it’s supposed to be a wedding ring? Why is he acting like this? What did I miss?_

He was tense. I could see that. I noticed his anxiety no matter how much he wanted to brush this off like it was nothing. It felt like I was treading on dangerous ground. 

While regarding the rings unceremoniously placed in my hands, I continued to surveil my partner in my peripheral vision. “Wow, Erik. They all look great. What did I do to deserve this?” 

Erik seemed to relax a little after my voiced approval. “You deserve the best, Raoul. No matter what you do.” 

He said it with the unblinking surety of a man lacking all doubts in his mission. I dropped the rings onto the nearby couch and pulled my man in for a kiss. I slid my tongue against his lips and he readily opened his mouth. I explored him deeper and deeper, every stroke of my tongue more thorough than the last. His low groan vibrated through me sending my blood rushing south. His hands were everywhere, one at my back pulling me closer, one in my hair tugging just enough to make me moan, and two of them gripping my ass tightly, slightly spreading my cheeks and caressing my hole through my clothes. 

_Wait, he couldn’t possibly have that many hands!_

I was loosing my grip on reality, but insanity didn’t seem like a bad option in Erik’s arms. My curiosity pulled me back to the real world before I could slip under Erik’s spell. I drew back and panted slightly, trying to catch my breath enough to get my mind into gear. 

“Thank you, my love. But what instigated this dive into hand fashion?” 

Erik bent down to kiss my neck. “I wanted to give you something you could be proud of.”

There was that hint of anxious distress again, almost completely hidden in his melodic voice. 

“What do you mean?”

Erik squirmed slightly. “Do you remember your brothers masquerade?”

I nodded.

“He spoke about… your new ring being a poor replacement for your old one.”

I opened my mouth to object when he forestalled me. 

“I know. I remember what you said about the ring giving you strength. I keep those words with me wherever I go, along with this.” He placed a hand over the my ring that he wore as a necklace. “But since _you_ actually have an appearance to keep up to the outside world, I thought you might have wanted a ring that looked better than ‘a poor replacement’.”

“My brother sure knows how to put his foot in his mouth.” I sighed and shook my head. “I’ve never seen our engagement ring as a poor replacement, Erik. I see it as a symbol of a love, lust, and loyalty unlike anything I’ve ever felt before. You don’t have to give me a replacement ring. You already give me so much more than I can ever begin to repay. I love you.” I grasped his face in my hands and pulled him closer until our lips were barely touching before I continued in a whisper across his lips. “And I love my ring.”

Erik groaned as the tidal wave of emotions broke free within him. He crushed me to him in a desperate kiss while his arms wound around me in a grip that ensured he’d never let me go. I proved my words to him as I met his passion with my own. 

Erik nipped up along my cheek to groan low in my ear. “God, you’re amazing, Raoul. What would I ever do without you? I love you more than my heart can bear.” More kisses were placed along the shell of my ear. “I’ll be your biggest fan. You’ll be absolutely amazing when you take the stage.”

_On stage?_

_Sorry, what?_

I pulled back enough to look him in the eye. “What do you mean ‘take the stage’? The only thing I’m taking is the deliciously sinful man in front of me.”

Erik smiled and pecked my lips sweetly. “Yes, dear. But you promised me that you’d do me a favour for accompanying you to Philippe’s wedding. I’m asking you to take a role in my new Opera.”

_No!_

I froze in place. My heart rate rose as the adrenalin hit my system. He couldn’t possibly be serious. Could he? I was neither a performer nor a singer. I may not be as secluded as my partner, but I certainly didn’t thrive in the spotlight. I pulled out of Erik’s grasp completely. 

“You cannot be serious. Erik, you have amazing performers at your mercy, how about you pick someone that knows how to act? Putting me on that stage, now _that_ would be a poor replacement.” I tried to make it sound humorous, but fear had contaminated my voice giving it a sharp edge. 

“Raoul,” Erik grasped my hands in his, “I’ve heard you sing. I’ll train you. Trust me, you’ll be marvellous on stage.”

“No, Erik, I can’t-“

“You promised me.”

_I did._

_And he upheld his end of the bargain._

But I had to convince him that me singing in front of Paris just wasn’t an option. “I’ll only ruin you music, Erik. I won’t do it justice. I’m not made for the stage like Christine is. She loves the audience and they love her. I only love the man in box five, and I was looking forward to sharing said box with him during the next big performance.”

Erik smiled. “Are you having a little stage fright?” Apparently he smiled for all the wrong reasons. 

_Yeah right…‘A little stage fright’, I feel like I’m about to throw up._

I hated it. I really didn’t want to enter the stage, but refusing Erik would mean breaking my promise to him. I know how unbelievably scary he found it to walk around the wedding festivities without his mask. He did me a huge favour. One that I had every intention of repaying, but simply thinking about walking out on that stage with all eyes on me made me nauseous. 

Erik saw my unease and frowned. “Raoul, I wrote this song with you in mind. I poured my very heart into it. It shows the depth of my feelings for you, all that love, lust, and loyalty that you mentioned a minute ago. Sometimes, words simply aren’t enough, and music is the only language that won’t betray me. I can think of no greater honour than you bringing the music I write to life. Would you do me that honour, dear?”

Erik’s voice drowned out all my doubts, arguments, and insecurities, and beyond my belief I heard myself say:

“Yes.”

* * *


	43. A fair trade

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is especially dedicated DKK5 who wanted more smut. (PS. I will keep your suggestion in mind.)
> 
> And to those of my readers who reads this during math class; This chapter contains lemons. And not like; If Erik has three lemons and Raoul has five, how many lemons do they have together? Cus when it comes to these guys and lemons, the answer will always be _More, oh my god more!_ ;)
> 
> To ardenshipsbullshit, eragon19, 1_Heluva_Butler, Memento_Vitae and Lely; I love your comments! They keep me going. 
> 
> And cred to my beta All_Terrain_Nerd

* * *

Before I could take back the word that had so carelessly slipped from my tongue, Erik was over me. He doused my face with loving pecks and caring praises. His hands slid up and down my back, caressing and pulling me closer. He kissed up along the side of my neck and drew my earlobe into his mouth. I gasped and moaned his name as he rubbed up against me. I felt his length harden, and I pulled his hands down to my ass as more of an order than an invitation. He was quick to catch on, as he squeezed and moulded my butt with his fingers. I latched onto his neck sucking hard, intent on marking him as mine. 

I gasped and broke away from my task as his finger brushed past my opening. Erik was giving me a smug smile. 

“Do you like that? You shuddered even more now than you did ten minutes ago.”

I gave him a fierce kiss before I panted the one word echoing through my mind.

“Again.”

Erik spread my cheeks a little wider as he let his finger repeat it’s devious caress. My hips jerked reflexively forward resulting in me grinding my cock against Erik’s. Simultaneous groans were uttered and I voiced my demand repeatedly.

“Again.”

A quick brush this time. He was teasing me, I knew it, and I found myself hating and loving it at the same time. 

“Again.”

Finally he let his finger stay in place to rub circles around my tight muscle. It sent shivers up my spine, but what really got me going was knowing exactly what he was going to do to that sinful little hole of mine. 

“More.”

_He’s barely started touching me and I’ve already been reduced to one word sentences._

“Get undressed, and I’ll be right back.”

I made quick work with the buttons of my shirt and had barely pulled down my pants before Erik was back, oil in hand. With a hand on my back steering me to the couch, Erik took command. 

“Now bend over the couch like a good boy.”

I felt my cock twitch in response to the praise and did as I was told. 

“That’s it,” Erik let his hand slide down my back to grip my ass, “now what did you say you wanted?”

_That teasing bastard._

“More.”

Erik chuckled and replied factiously, “I’m afraid you have to be a bit more specific, dear.”  
“Fuck!”

I swore as he let his well oiled finger slide past my entrance briefly. 

“I’m sure you can do better than that, Raoul. Your instructions need to be a little more informative. Fuck you how?”

The tugging at the corner of my lips had nothing to do with my current frustration and everything to do with the contagious smile that could be heard in Erik’s voice. 

_Fine! I’ll give you instructions, Phantom!_

“I want you press that evasive finger into my ass, pull it back and forth until you can get more of those skilful fingers in. And then I want you to scissor me open so that I’ll be able to take that long cock of yours hard-“

I didn’t get to finish as Erik impaled me and I clenched hard around his forefinger. Apparently I wasn’t the only one turned on by dirty talk. Erik pushed more of his finger into me and moaned.

“God, you should see this, Raoul. The way your ass squeezes my finger. You are so unbelievably tight that if I hadn’t fucked you myself, I’d never thought this ass could take a whole cock.”

Erik continued to work my hole as his other hand played with my balls. I pushed back to impale myself further onto his finger and he playfully nipped at my butt. 

“Are you being a naughty boy, Raoul? Well then you should get what you deserve.” He pulled his finger out of me before it pushed it’s way in again, this time along with an equally oily companion. 

“Aaaahh!”

The sounds that escaped me were beyond my control. 

“Too much?” Eriks fingers stilled.

“Not enough.” I growled and pushed back on him yet again. The feeling of Erik stretching my ass open drowned out everything else. It gave me something solid to focus on. I just wanted more of him. 

“Woah, easy there, Viscompte. I know you’re eager, but leave it to me, and I’ll make sure you’ll be filled to the brim.”

Slowly, way _too_ slowly, Erik started his scissoring movements. 

“That’s it, dear.” Erik cooed softly. “Relax. You look amazing, Raoul. You’re almost ready for the real thing.” Erik used the hand that wasn’t currently working in me to grip my stone hard member. “Mmmm, your cock is absolutely divine, Raoul. I love the feel of it. I love the taste of it. I wonder what it would feel like in my ass.” I groaned at the mental images and he deftly caught the glistening bead of precum which he brought to his lips. “It tastes so good, Raoul. Do you think you can take three fingers now?”

“Yes!”

Three fingers were pushed in, and pulled out. 

“Erik,” I panted, “I can’t take it anymore. I need you now. _Now_!” 

Erik let his pants fall to the floor and sat on the sofa rubbing his long member up and down. He made sure it was completely covered in oil and it looked absolutely delectable. I climbed up in his lap and aligned him to my hole. 

“Go slowly now, Raoul. Be patient and take your time.”

_‘Take my time’? Who does he think I am?_

I let gravity assist in my wanton endeavour as I impaled myself on Erik’s rigid length. I didn’t get far before Erik flipped me down on the sofa. He frowned and scowled at me.

“Raoul! What happened to being patient?”

“I’m not taking my time. I’m taking _you_!”

If I hadn’t been looking for it, I’m sure I would have missed the tiny tug at the corner of his mouth. He made sure I didn’t miss his frown though, as he let it deepen along with another earful.

“I’m not going to let you hurt yourself in your fervour. If you want to be on top, you have to prove to me that you will go slowly. At least until I’m sure you can take it.” 

Something was poking my back. Something hard, sharp, and definitely not meant to have sex on. Erik, of course, took my small grunts of pain the wrong way. 

“See? Now you’re sore and we’ve barely even started, now if you’d just-“

“That’s not it. There’s something here.” I reached under me and pulled out a handful of rings. 

_Oh, right! I’d forgotten all about them._

“Ah, it’s the rings,” I tried one on, (since Erik obviously wasn’t about to fuck me into the floor anytime soon. Bitter? Very much so.) “How did you get my ring size?”

Erik smiled and winked at me. “Intuition.” 

“Right, what’s your size?” 

He still wore the Chagny ring I gave him on a chain around his neck.  
“The ring size that would fit me the best would be this one.” He caressed my anus as it clenched tightly around his cock. 

I moaned and was rewarded with another inch of pure pleasure. I dropped the rings unto the nearby carpet. They were not the ring I was currently concerned with.

“Now, you relax like a good boy, and I’ll fill you up completely. Can you do that for me, dear?”

“Yes!” A few deep breaths and he slowly slid all the way into me. The small rocking motion turned into longer and longer strokes as our moans grew in volume. 

“Now,” Erik stilled, “Do you still want to be on top?”

I smiled. “Do you have to ask?”

Erik lifted me until he was once again sitting in the sofa with me in his lap. This time with the added bonus of having his cock deeply embedded in my ass. I started rocking my hips up and down, absolutely loving the thick shaft that filled me to the brim. 

“Good god, I love your cock, Erik!”

“You think you love it now,” Erik grabbed my hips, “just wait until I do this.”

He started thrusting up into me effectively assaulting my prostate with each stroke. I threw my head back as he took me harder and harder, _finally_ giving me the fucking I’d yearned for all day.

“There! Yes, there!”

I grabbed a hold of myself and pumped myself quickly as Erik pounded my ass. 

“Come with me, Raoul.”

I didn’t need more persuasion than that. I shot my load over Erik, almost reaching his chin while he emptied himself deep inside of me. 

A few minutes was spent panting in companiable silence. 

“Thank you for the rings, by the way.” I pecked him on his uncovered cheek.

Erik chuckled. “I should be the one thanking for the ring.”

I snorted. “I meant rings to wear on your fingers.”

Erik simply raised his visible eyebrow. 

“Fine, you win,” I chuckled, “I’ll give you that.”

“You give me that, and I’ll give you rings. Seems like a fair trade to me.”

* * *


	44. Stages and Goats

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So eh... two months later, eh?   
> Thank you for all the lovely kudos and comments. I love 'em all.   
> I graduated and got a job, which is nice. But it takes a lot of time and energy. And I've moved. So I had to prioritise other things for a while. But now I'm on summer vacation, so enjoy the new chapter! 
> 
> As always; My beta, All_Terrain_Nerd, is the bestest of best! <3

* * *

_What have I done?_

I entered the stage on wobbly legs. My blood was coursing through my veins. My palms were cold and sweaty at the same time. How is that even possible?

I wasn’t alone on stage; there were other members of the cast there as well. They were talking in small groups, probably discussing the music or possible improvements. 

I had visited the bathroom five times within the last hour, but it felt like another trip might just be a good idea. 

The maestro in the pit clapped his hands to demand everyone’s attention and the chatter died out. And with it died the last bit of my courage. I heard the violins start to play the intro, and time slowed. I was just about to turn on my heel and walk out of there when I glimpsed something white in box five. He was there. 

_Of course he’s there, since he’s there almost every practice. Besides, they’re playing his music. Where else would he be?_

I recognised the tunes from the orchestra, having practiced the song many times over with Erik. It took me quite some time to get the hang of it, but Erik was a patient teacher, taking his time and praising me endlessly whenever I made any kind of progress. I counted the beats to know when to start singing. 

_4… 3… 2.. 1…_

I opened my mouth and out came… the weakest sound imaginable. I barely heard it myself and wasn’t surprised therefore when the maestro clapped his hands again to stop the ensemble. 

“We’ll have to start over. Monsieur le Viscompte wasn’t prepared. From the top everyone, and 4, 3, 2, 1.” 

I was prepared, and I did sing, he just didn’t hear it since my throat had apparently run dry. 

The music started up all over again and I tried to force my breath to stay calm and steady. I had to do this. I had to go through with it. I had to for it for _him_. I looked down at the note sheets, not actually seeing the page or needing it for that matter since I knew the song by heart. It did give me something to hide behind though, and I now understood Erik’s penchant for masks. 

I really, _really_ didn’t want to let him down, so two bars before my entrance I stood up straighter and took a deep breath. 

It was better the second time around. At least I heard myself now, but I was shaking so much that my vibrato increased substantially. Note for note, I trembled my way through my solo. Missing a few notes here and there, I sank deeper and deeper into the note sheets. 

Then came the modulation, and I was supposed to sing it a full note higher. The pounding in my ears drowned out just about everything else and I forced the sound out of me hearing nothing but my heartbeat. 

_Here comes the high part._

I braced myself and sang. 

The noise that escaped me sounded more like a strangled goat than anything else, really. I blushed furiously as I tried to focus on the last fifteen seconds of the song but to no avail. Once that squealing goat had been released, there was no going back. My throat tightened around any sound that wanted to come out, in some kind of self defence. 

_God, what is wrong with me?_

A wobbly pathetic attempt at a finishing tone and my part in the song was finally over. I didn’t wait for the rest of them to finish as I fled. 

I turned my head away from box five as I hurried out of the Opera. He didn’t need to see this, and he definitely didn’t need to hear this. Three sharp corners later (Yes, by now I didn’t need to think twice before finding my way through the Opera), and I was breathing fresh air. I quickly put distance between myself and the concert house while I tried to calm my tumultuous stomach. A small voice in my head argued that this probably wasn’t the most rational way to handle the situation, but the larger part of me just couldn’t see him right now. 

I had to get away. I waved at a nearby carriage and thanked my lucky stars that it was empty. I was in no mood for small talk. 

As the carriage shot off toward the estate, I hid my face in my palms. 

_What have I done? I love that musical maniac more than anything._

That’s why I couldn’t say no to him. He believed I would sing beautifully, and he managed to convince me. It was one thing to sing at home in front if Erik alone. It was another thing completely to do it in front of an audience.

I berated myself all the way to the mansion. Once I arrived, I dug into everything that needed to be done, big or small didn’t matter, any chore that could take my mind off the intense feeling of shame was good enough.

* * *

I fell face forward onto the bed later that night. Physically, I was exhausted. I yearned to just pass out, but the memory of my dissonance still haunted my mind. 

_I should probably write Erik some kind of letter._

But how do I start that letter? ‘Bonjour Love, I’m sorry for ruining your music, but don’t you think it would be a refreshing surprise to throw in a goat onstage just in time for the modulation?’ I snorted down into the pillow at my horrible excuse. I gave up on the idea of sending word to the Opera. I knew I had to face Erik sooner or later, but right now I just wanted to burrow deep within the covers until the world around me disappeared. I was a coward, I know. 

As I laid down to sleep, all the thoughts that I’d pushed away during the day caught up with me. Would he see me the same way? How badly did he cringe when my notes wobbled? Did I even want to know? How quickly could he get a tenor to take my place? Could we go back to normal, never speak of this day, and just pretend it never happened? I finally fell asleep after an eternity of tossing and turning. 

* * *

Two days later, and I’d finally found the courage to walk back to the opera. I’d heard no word from Erik in that time. I didn’t know if he was angry with me, or upset, or just really disappointed. I tried to hold my head high as I strode through the Opera’s entrance hall. I was a de Chagny after all. But my title did nothing to lessen the feeling of dread and guilt that bore it’s way into me. 

I made my way down through the tunnels to Erik’s home. I had barely rounded the last corner before I stood face to face with the love of my life. He was handsome in his black suit and white mask. His face was impassive and he regarded me warily. 

“So you came back.”

I swallowed around the lump in my throat. “Yes. I always do, remember?” I waved my hand with our engagement ring on. 

He didn’t smile, and I felt a lot of my confidence drain out of me. I lowered my hand slowly, suddenly wondering whether I was allowed to wear the ring after all. 

“Look, Erik. I’m really sorry about what happened onstage.” I couldn’t look him in the eye, but I needed to get this off my chest. “My nerves got the better of me. I know I promised to do this for you, but I… can’t. You spoke about it ‘being an honour, bringing your music to life’… Please forgive me, love. I truly wish I could have done your music justice.”

Erik cautiously stepped in front of me. He used his cold fingers to lift my chin until I had no choice but to look him in the eye. 

“Is that why you ran away?”

I nodded.

 _God, how I missed his touch! I really need him to forgive me._

“Please, Erik,” I whispered hastily. “I’ll track down the best tenor there is. You deserve so much better. You wrote that beautiful piece of music just for me, and I let you down.”

“Raoul, no.” I looked up to see that Erik had dropped his impassive façade to show his concern. “ _I_ should be the one asking for forgiveness. I pushed you too far. You told me time and time again that you didn’t want this, yet I forced you take on a role with barely any training at all.” 

He softly brushed his lips against mine. “Practicing with you, just hearing it sung with your voice, it drove my expectations sky high. I thought your comments about nervousness were just you being bashful. I never stopped to consider the possibility that you were serious.”

Relief washed through me, and I pulled him tight toward my chest and buried my face in his neck. My thoughts and feelings were all over the place, but I managed to relay the single most important one.

“Erik, I love you.”


	45. Hats and sounds of silence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone still with me? If so, this chapter is dedicated to you. 
> 
> I know I haven't updated in a few months, but sometimes you have to prioritise other things in life. I can't promise to update as frequently as I did before, but I haven't forgotten about it either. Perhaps you could see it more like a happy surprise when I actually do update. :)
> 
> And as always; Huge hugs to my Beta, All_Terrain_Nerd!

* * *

“One, two, three, four and five six, seven, eight!”

Madame Giry was leading the ballet girls in a series of steps around the stage. I was impressed, they were all very talented at such a young age. My focus was solely on the girls doing the pirouettes, and therefore I must have missed it. 

I heard Christine cry out, and as I looked over, I saw her standing among a group of chorus girls. A group of _giggling_ chorus girls. 

_This can’t be good._

I scowled, and made my way over. 

“What seems to be the problem, dearest?” I asked as I put my arm around Christine’s shoulder. 

“My hat,” She stuttered. “It’s up there now.” She meekly pointed toward box five. 

“What are you waiting for, Christine?” one of the girls prodded. “Just go get it. You’re not afraid of ghosts, are you?” Christine shrank back into my embrace, and I’d had enough. 

“Who threw the hat up there?” I used my stern voice as I glared at all the chorus girls in turn. “Tell me!” I realised then that I sounded a lot like Erik when he was the Phantom. 

The girls kept quiet, maintaining a phalanx of camaraderie. 

_Well, if I can’t get the information here, I’ll have to turn somewhere else. And I know just the man for the job._

I hugged Christine a little tighter and gave her a peck on the forehead. “I’ll get it for you.”

I started off toward one of the staircases before Christine caught my sleeve. “No! Don’t! What if he’s up there?” 

_I’m rather hoping he_ is. 

“Shh. It’ll be alright. I’m just going to go up, get your hat, and get out. I’ll be out of there before he even notices my presence.” 

“No, Raoul. It’s too dangerous.” By now other parts of the crew had taken interest in our disagreement and tried to grasp the situation. 

“Monsieur le Viscompte,” the tenor that I’d hired to take my role interjected, “What are you up to?” 

I sighed and tried to downplay situation so that they’d let me go up there alone. Erik would never allow anyone other than myself into his box. 

“ _Someone_ ,” I glared at the chorus girls once again, “thought it to be fun to throw up Christine’s hat into box five. I’m going to get it.”

“But, sir… the phantom…”

“I know. I’ll keep him in mind.”

_Don’t I always._

“Now, If you’ll excuse me.” I gently extracted me sleeve from Christine’s clutched fingers and started once again toward the stairs. 

“Wait, Monsieur!” A stage hand caught up with me and handed over a huge candelabra used in production. “Take this with you. Just in case.”

“Ah… of course.” I hefted the heavy decoration in my hand, and did a few practice swings for show. 

“Please, Raoul,” Christine cried, “It’s not worth it. It’s just a stupid hat.”

That’s it. I have to go up there before this escalates to unnecessary proportions. “I’m going up, and that’s end of discussion.”

Candelabra in hand, I ascended the stairs, leaving the hushed voices of the crew behind me. 

* * *

I whistled quietly as I neared the entrance to box five. Erik had most likely seen and heard everything that occurred on stage, but the whistling was to confirm not only that it was me, but that I was indeed alone. 

Barely had I entered the box and closed the door behind me before Erik was pulling me into his arms. The candelabra fell to the floor with a loud clang. 

Erik looked at it with a raised eyebrow. “What on earth are you going to do with that?”

I smirked cheekily. “I’m going to light up your world, darling.”

“You already do.” Erik closed his lips over mine and I couldn’t help the groan that escaped me. My hands sought out his ass completely of their own accord. They are starting to do that a lot lately, and my mind has given up on scolding them into behaving.  
Erik’s tongue slowly parted my lips and a shiver went down my spine. 

He pulled back before I could deepen the kiss. “You’re here for the hat.”

“Hat?” I repeated dumbly while my mind was stuck on how to get Erik to kiss me again. 

Erik smiled knowingly before leaning in close enough that I could feel his breath on my skin. “Christine’s hat. You came up here to get it. Or did you want something else?” Erik lifted an eyebrow suggestively. 

“Well,” I shrugged, “you know me.”

Erik’s husky laughter confirmed my statement. 

“Well… I have yet to claim you in box five.” Erik slid his hands down the front of my shirt. “You would like that? Wouldn’t you? To be at my mercy up here in the dark.” He brushed his lips past the shell of my ear and continued in a sensual whisper. “Would you be able to keep quiet, dearest? Could you keep those sweet mewls of pleasure from reaching the people practicing below, while I let my finger circle your opening?”

I sucked in a breath as a wave of arousal washed over me. I nodded vigorously. Wordlessly communicating that I could be as quiet as he needed me to be and that I would be a most willing participant in his little games. 

I could feel Erik’s lips as he smiled against my ear. “Really now? And what would you do when I let that finger breach that tight little muscle, hmm? Would you be a good boy and revel in silence?” 

I nodded as I kissed down his neck and slowly scraped my teeth where neck turned to shoulder. Erik hissed in pleasure. 

“But you know what comes next, Raoul. I don’t think you’d be able to bite your tongue when I eventually find your prostate. That delightful spot that makes you throw your head back and howl in pleasure. You know, that once I find that spot inside you, I always assault it relentlessly. And then everyone in the Opera would know just how much you belong to me.”

He sounded quite pleased at the prospect of me screaming out his name so the entire Opera could hear it. Of course, I knew it would never come to that. I would be able to keep quiet since I knew the consequences. “I’ll play your game, Erik.”

Erik cupped me through my pants and I sucked in another deep breath of air. 

“Prove it to me, Raoul. Prove to me that you can keep your pleasure quiet and I’ll consider it for another time.”

Erik got down onto his knees before me and untied my pantaloons. I leaned back against the wall. Knowing I would need all the support I could get in the following minutes. 

It was almost over before it had even started. Erik’s tongue was warm and wet as it slid up along the underside of my cock. The air left my lungs in a whoosh, but other than that, no sound. Erik rolled his tongue around the head a couple of times before taking me in deep and sucking hard. I shoved my hand into my mouth and bit down to keep the groan inside of me.

Erik went up and down, purring low and sending vibrations down to the bottom of my spine. He worked the base of my cock in one hand while the other sneaked around to my back entrance. Erik sucked hard once more, his finger prodded my ass, and that was it for me. I threw my head back, and the intense pleasure covered the pain of knocking my head into the wall. I shot my load into Erik’s awaiting mouth, biting my hand hard enough to break the skin. But I’d made it! I’d managed to come without moaning loudly. 

Erik, of course, wasn’t too happy with my bloodied hand or the wound at the back of my head that would soon turn into a bump. He muttered about _unnecessary to ruin such perfect skin_ while he tied my hand up with my handkerchief. Then he gave me back the hat, pointed out the perpetrator among the chorus girls, and sent me back down with a dazed smile on my lips. 

Barely had I reached the bottom of the stairs before the crew was over me, asking all kind of questions, _what happened, was I hurt, was the phantom there, why was there a loud bang, what happened to my hand, why was I rubbing my head,_ and so on. I lifted my hand to quiet the onslaught of questions. “I’m fine. The Phantom was indeed present, but luckily I got out of there with merely minor injuries.” I touched rubbed the sore spot at the back of my head. “He told me I wouldn’t be so fortunate next time. He sent me off with a warning concerning bickering and mischief.” I glared at each of the chorus girls before finding the redhead that threw Christine’s hat up in box five in the first place. 

“If anyone is to pick on Christine again. He will know. And he would make this,” I held up the hand with my now spottedly bloodied handkerchief, “seem like a summer breeze.” The fear in her eyes was evident, so I turned back to Christine and handed her the hat. 

“You are so incredibly brave, Raoul!” Christine threw herself in my arms and some of the crew cheered. Other congratulated me on my success and many were impressed by my seemingly courageous endeavour. 

I merely smiled and nodded. I was pretty pleased with my achievement, knowing it would probably lead to an even more adventurous experience some time in the future. 

What that would entail though, was something they would never know. That would solely be kept between me and my lover.

That is, if I could manage to keep my mouth shut.


	46. Bravo!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To each and everyone of you who has read, liked, subscribed and commented. Especially commented. Thank you; eragon19, ElectraX12, DKK5, emmawicked, Lely, 1_Heluva_Butler, Kala, love_so_quickly, erik_what_the_fuck, Trash_For_Ships, Black Eyed Children, point92five, and MaidenofChains! Your comments is what keeps me coming back to the story. 
> 
> I've tried to get into contact with my great Beta, but he hasn't answered me yet. :/ Perhaps life got in the way. Since I'm impatient, I'll post anyhow. The language and grammar might be slightly lacking since my awesome Beta hasn't had a finger in it, but bear with me.

* * *

He was anxious. I didn’t even have to look at him to know that he was worried. As the carriage rocked from side to side over the bumpy dirt road I tried to think of ways to sooth my tense beloved. He was doing his very best at hiding his discomfort, but to me it was blatantly obvious. I am well aware that he rarely leaves the Opera, and when he does it is normally not for too long so his uneasiness in these kinds of situations is nothing new to me. I tried to ease his mind by making small talk in the carriage.

“So, Love, have you seen any more bickering from your perfect viewpoint in box five?”

Erik looked up at me, a little startled, obviously in his own thoughts. “Hmm? You mean if they’ve been teasing Christine? No, not that I’ve seen. Or heard of for that matter. Christine seemed to be in a very good mood last lesson. She spoke for minutes on end about how brave you were to fetch her hat.” A naughty half smile grazed his lips. “I must say you were quite impressive down there.”

I cut him off before he could continue. ”Oh, I’d say _you_ were quite impressive _down there_.” I smiled and nodded knowingly.

It pleased me immensely when Erik chuckled. 

“I meant your acting skills. For a minute there I thought I’s sent you off too early. You were so wobbly and dazed you could hardly walk straight. But you used it to your advantage. Bravo.”

“To _our_ advantage if I may say so myself. Now the Opera knows you still exist and keep and eye on them and hopefully that will be all we need to do to keep them in line.”

“Indeed. Good work, Raoul.”

“Well…” I gave him my most dazzling smile. ”I couldn’t have done it without you.”

Erik snorted, but smiled nonetheless. 

* * *

We reached the de Chagny estate and walked side by side to the main entrance. I stifled the urge to grasp his hand in mine. It was unnerving to know that I wasn’t allowed to take it when I knew it would fit perfectly in mine. 

My brother Philippe greeted us in the main hallway before ushering us into my fathers study. We were going to go through the de Chagny finances today and decide where we should invest and which organizations to give patronage to. I was quite confident that we would continue our support of the Opera since the last show was so sucessful. 

I was in fact quite proud of myself as I recounted the economical statistics for the gathered group of men. There were six of us all in all. My father, my brother and I made out the de Chagny family. He other three men were there as consultants. Monsieur Gilbert was one of my fathers most trusted men, Monsieur Jean Blanc was not only the house chef but also the head of the household staff, and of course, last but certainly not least, Erik. My Erik. Or Monsieur Chambon as the rest of them knew him. I’d brought him along since he played such a big role in the great success that was the Operas last show. And it was a good time as any to get him to practice being out in the open. 

My fathers rumbling voce interrupted my train of thought. “That is all very well, Raoul. Personally, I _never_ would have thought that Opera was anything but a waste of time.”

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes but couldn’t stop the cynical remark that seemed to leave my mouth by itself. 

“Really now? And here I thought you were such a big fan since you watched the show how many times? Oh, right. _None_.” 

Luckily, Philippe stepped in before it could get ugly. “The show was marvelous. Truly. And from what I’ve heard from Raoul, you have already started to compose another opera. Isn’t that so Monsieur Chambon?”

“I have. Though it is far from finished.” Erik answered as clearly as he could from underneath all the bandages covering his face. 

My father took that chance to prove once again that he was completely lacking any form of tact. “And will it be as successful as the last one?”

I counted slowly backwards from ten to calm down as I replied. “Father, there is no way in knowing beforehand what the Parisians will like or not. We have a good crew and an amazing composer. The rest is up to the audience, really.”

“But there must be _some_ way to prove that the Opera is worth our patronage. Monsieur Chambon, play us something from that new Opera of yours!”

I had to count slowly backwards from _twenty_ to not let all the men present know what a gormless idiot my father was. The fact that he thought _one man_ could play a song composed for an orchestra proved just how little he knew about music. Or anything cultural really. 

“Fine.”

Erik’s answer had me stumped. 

He stood up from his chair. “It is not finished yet, and it will sound far better with the many sounds of the orchestra coming together to bring it to life, but I’ll try to do it justice on the piano.”

Erik started off toward the piano in one of our reception halls. He must have noticed it on the masquerade, or perhaps on the reception after Philippe’s and Celine’s wedding. The rest of us trailed after him and I heard Philippe ask a question. 

“So what will we be hearing? What’s the name of the song?”

“Hrm… Well it is just called _R number five_ actually. Like I said it’s a work in progress.”

I smiled, knowing that the R stood for nothing other than Raoul. 

Erik sat behind the piano, took a deep breath and started playing. 

Would I ever get used to hearing this man’s music? Probably not. I was once again struck by wave of colorful emotions that he conveyed so perfectly through the dynamics and the combinations of keys. 

I closed my eyes and relaxed into the trusting tapestry of cheerful sensations that he masterfully weaved together. He was taking us away on a daring adventure with a good outcome. It was the feeling of bravery and youth combined with a healthy dose of fortune that favors the bold. An excellent choice of song in aspect to the matters discussed. 

I managed to break free from his spell long enough to look up at the rest of the men. I realized that aside from me, Philippe was the only one who had heard Erik’s music before. He had heard the Erik’s music at the Opera and even he had never heard Erik play before. They all looked about as dumbstruck as I imagine myself the first time I heard him. Even my father stood there with his mouth agape. The music left no one unaffected. 

Philippe pulled back his sleeve and held up his arm for me to see. It was completely covered in goosebumps. I smiled, knowing the feeling all too well. 

Erik came to the conclusion of the song, and after the last victorious chord had rung out in the reception hall a thunderous applause took its place. I turned around to notice that the household staff had tiptoed into the room during the performance. The audience had grown from five people to fourteen. Even the stable boys and the mail man were there applauding and cheering. 

No one cheered louder than my own father though. 

“I must give it to you, Monsieur Chambon, that was unlike anything I’ve ever heard before. Decapitato!”

“Dacapo, Father. It is called _Dacapo_.”

Erik dimply smiled at my father’s erroneous comment about beheading, and made a small bow to the still clapping audience. He looked up at me and I mouthed _Fantastic_ over the continuing praise. 

Erik seemed to grow in the glowing approval of the audience. Gone was the anxious man in the carriage, and in his place was a magnificent composer being praised for his splendid skill. There was only one word left to say. 

“Bravo!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you weren't expecting a sex scene. It will be one in next chapter. I promise. I intended for it to happen in this one, but then the story got a life of it's own and Erik started playing piano. And that's pretty much an orgasm in itself.


	47. A sinful view

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To each and every one of you who took the time to read and comment; Enderblade 34, eragon19, MaidenfChains, point92five, NayteYouFool, irlwhizzerbrown (masterlyjudgement),LizzieRosa and WorriarTiger. 
> 
>  
> 
> And as always, if you find typos; Feel free to correct me. I'm without a Beta so I'm grateful for all the help I can get.

* * *

“That was absolutely amazing.”

“Thank you. I’m not used to playing in front of an audience, but I think it went rather well.”

“ _Rather well_?” I snorted. “If music was a religion, you would have turned my blaspheming father into a believer.”

“Well, at least I got to finish the meeting on a happy note, so to speak.” 

I chuckled at Erik’s wordplay. “A happy note indeed.”

Erik smiled and looked out the window. “You have a great view from here.” 

After the end of the meeting we had retired to my room on the second floor. Even though nothing had gone wrong, Erik still seemed tense with other people around, so I figured I’d invite him to my room to give him some kind of reprieve. 

Being with me behind closed doors seemed to do the trick as I could feel Erik slowly relaxing. 

I walked up behind him and slid my arms around his waist. “I am so proud of you. Not only did you secure patronage for the Opera for yet another year, but also you managed to impress an uncultured idiot.” 

“He can’t be a complete idiot since he fathered you.”

“You’d be surprised.”

I trailed kisses up along Erik’s neck over the parts covered in bandages and the ones without. I don’t discriminate. Erik moaned as he leaned into me. “Raoul, we shouldn’t do that here.”

“Why not?” I scraped lightly with my teeth against his earlobe, the only part of his ear sticking out from underneath the bandages. “Monsieur Gilbert has gone home. Jean is preparing for dinner that won’t be served for another hour and a half, and my brother and my father are engrossed in banking matters for the rest of the day. I can think of a few ways to spend our time.”

“Raoul. I feel perfectly content just looking out the window for a few hours. Just contemplating life. Just because we could, doesn’t mean that we should.” Erik pulled away from me slightly and made a point of looking straight out the window. 

I wasn’t about to give up as easily as that. 

“Okay.” I let out a huge sigh to make him think I was giving in. “You do that. Do you mind if I don’t join you in the pointless staring at our surroundings?”

“You are free to do whatever you like. It is your home after all.”

_Perfect._

I walked over to my wardrobe and started to unbutton my vest slowly while humming the tune Erik had recently played. Before long I could shrug off my vest and start working on my shirt. I glanced at Erik whose back was turned towards me. I kept on humming as I stripped off all of my clothes. I put them in a folded pile in the wardrobe before I took the bag that I’d brought with me from the Opera and dropped it by the bed. I lay down butt naked on my back, put the pillows comfortably behind me and got to work. 

I was already half hard since just thinking about it was enough to turn me on. I grasped my member and started to stroke up and down in languid strokes. A soft moan escaped me, and that was enough to get Erik’s attention. He whipped his head in my direction and the widening of his eyes was almost comical. 

“Ra… Raoul? What are you doing?”

“What does it look like? I’m taking matters into my own hands. Quite literally, if I may say so myself.”

“I can see that.” Erik’s gaze was unabashedly stuck at my crotch and the hand that went up and down repeatedly. “But, why?”

“You said it yourself. I am free to do whatever I like. And right now I want to do me. Or at least someone has to, and since my partner wasn’t available at the moment I figured I’d take care of it myself.” I rubbed my thumb over the head of my cock and smeared the precum that had already started leaking from the sensitive head. I groaned louder and bucked my hips up into my hand. 

Erik’s mouth fell open silently. I took that as a sign to continue and doubled my efforts, stroking quicker and giving my wrist that little twist each time I reached the head. _Ah, just so._ I threw my head back and moaned shamelessly. I worked quicker, and then slower. I picked up the pace again and watched the anticipation grow in Erik’s eyes. 

And then I stopped.

Just like that. 

Erik snapped his attention up to my face again. “Why did you stop? You were close, I can tell!”

I shrugged and tried to look indifferent. “It isn’t half as fun to do it without your help.”

I didn’t have to wait long. Within seconds Erik was tearing off his own clothes and within a minute he was over me. He was kissing me roughly. It was hot and deep and very passionate. His hand trailed down my abs to grasp my member firmly in his hand. I was close to coming even before Erik touched me. His firm grip had me on the very edge in seconds. 

_Lord, dear Lord above!_

“Erik, please!” My plea came out as a breathless whisper. 

“Please what, Raoul? Please stroke your cock until you spurt all over? Please suck you dry? I like it when you show off your beautiful body for me. Love it when you’re all spread out and horny and eager. I’m addicted to the sight of you writhing in pleasure.”

“Please take me, Erik. Stretch me open and fill me up. I want to come with you filling me to the brim.”

Erik groaned low in his throat, but then shook his head. “We can’t. We don’t have any form of lubrication and I’m not going to risk hurting you. That is not an option.”

“As a matter of fact, we do.” I pushed Erik off to reach the bag that I’d brought with me from the Opera. From the bag I produced our favorite bottle of olive oil. 

“You planned this?” Erik asked incredulous. 

“Oh, I had a feeling I’d might be able to win you over”

“You are so full of yourself.” Erik shook his head, smiling. 

“And hopefully, in a moment, I’ll be full of you.”

Erik’s smile widened. “Then hand me the bottle, Viscompte, and I’ll show you just filed you can be.”

Erik covered his fingers in oil and I eagerly spread my legs. He circled my opening with his oily finger and I mewled. 

Erik pressed forward slightly, slowly breaching me. “That’s it, Raoul. You look so handsome. The sight of you pleasuring yourself is one of the most erotic sights I’ve ever seen. I must ask for an encore at a later date.” He pressed his finger in further and I enjoyed myself thoroughly.

“If this is the treatment I get for giving you a show, then I’d gladly give you as many encores as you like. Don’t hold back on me, Erik. Give me more.”

I moaned loudly as Erik inserted another finger in me and carefully scissored me open. 

“Always so impatient, Raoul. And I believe your impatience has rubbed off on me. Or it could have something to do with that deliciously sinful show you just gave me.”

Erik slicked up his well-endowed equipment until it gleamed, before pressing the tip against my hole.

_Heaven._

I let out a shameless groan as he pushed his way into me. I mentally congratulated myself on a job well done and then leaned back to reap the fruit of my labor. I pulled Erik down on top of me. The feeling of his warm skin sliding against mine, and the smell that was uniquely him invaded my senses. 

I kissed him, trying to convey the passion burning inside me. “I love you so much, Erik.”

Erik pulled out of me before pushing back in again. “I love you too, Raoul. I love you more than the moon loves the night sky, and the fish loves the sea. You are my reason to live.”

I grabbed the back of his head and kissed him without abandon. He moved in me, quickly picking up the pace. I was so close. So very, very close. When that what must not occur, happened. 

In hindsight, we really should have locked the door…


	48. Again with the lock

* * *

“Raoul, we need you to…” Philippe stopped midsentence when the sight of me and Erik naked on the bed caught him be surprise. 

Then everything sort of happened at once. 

Erik and I quickly disentangled ourselves while I desperately tried to come up with some sort of excuse. _It’s not what it looks like?_ What in the world would be an acceptable explanation as to why Erik was balls deep in my ass? I started saying many sentences at once and it all came out as a jumbled up mess. 

Philippe took two steps into the room and quickly closed the door behind him. I got up to try to cover Erik as much as possible. Of course it was embarrassing to be caught red handed by my own brother but I knew it would feel ten times worse for Erik knowing he wasn’t used to people seeing him. Especially seeing him naked. 

Philippe’s angry gaze nailed me to the spot. 

“What the _hell_ do you think you are doing?” Philippe questioned me in a harsh whisper. 

I held up my hands in front of me in the universal sign of surrendering. I had to calm the situation down. My brother may have teased me when we were younger but he had a good heart, and had always stayed by my side when I needed it, so perhaps he could be reasoned with. 

“Philippe, If you would please listen. I can explain.” I heard Erik quickly getting dressed behind me. 

Philippe tilted his head backwards and slid his hands through his hair in a sign of exasperation. “Raoul! I don’t need an explanation! But I thought you were _better than this_!”

The shuffling of clothes behind me stopped. I could practically hear Erik’s thoughts inside me. _He’s thinking that this is it. That I’ll leave him now that we’re caught together. Or that we’ll be forced apart._

I myself was disappointed that Philippe wouldn’t even listen to my side of the story. How could he who had known me all my life not care enough to try to understand my feelings and choices? Sure, they were different than his, but that doesn’t necessarily make them worse. 

Philippe turned to the door and locked it before turning back to face us again. With a snide voice he commented: “See, now that wasn’t so hard, was it? Locking the door, that is. And get dressed, will you? ”

He continued before I could say anything. “Don’t you realize that _anyone_ could have walked in here? What if Monsieur Gilbert had decided he needed to talk some thing over? Or even worse; what if _father_ had caught you? Then what?”  
Philippe had started pacing back and forth during his rant. “All because you’re too lazy to lock the door. Really Raoul, that is the first rule when sneaking lovers into the mansion, I really thought I taught you better then that!” He threw an angry glance in my direction. “And get dressed for God’s sake. Monsieur Chambon may like to see your naked hide, but there’s no reason to show it to the rest of us.”

That got my mind into gear. “Wait, you _knew_?” I questioned my brother as I started rather distractedly to put on the clothes that Erik handed me. 

“What? That you were into men? Of course I knew. I just thought you were smart enough to keep your more amorous activities in behind locked doors. I couldn't care less about who you take as a partner as long as you're happy, but I thought it was a touchy subject so I never brought it up. But if father hears anything about this he'll disown you in a second, which is why I taught you early to _lock the door_.”

“I-I… but… when?” I stuttered in search for words but Philippe seemed to grasp my meaning. 

“When I figured it out? Do you remember the archery instructor? The man with the very muscular arms? That’s when I first noticed it.” 

I nodded, still a bit disbelieving that my brother had known this about me for years. “That was when I too understood I was a fan of the man, so to speak.” 

Philippe snorted. “Fan of the man, good one. But what about this Christine? When you broke your arm and asked me to send a word to her I thought you had moved on from men. You seemed so earnest when you wanted me to let her know what had happened.”

“That letter was for me.” Erik spoke for the first time since Philippe had entered the room. “It was addressed to Christine, but the message was intended to ease _my_ mind, not Christine’s.”

“I see. That makes sense. Ever since I first met you at the Masquerade, Monsieur Chambon, I thought there was something between you and my brother.”

The orgasm-deprived part of me couldn’t help but to comment on that. “And still you waltzed right in here without knocking.”

“Again with the lock, Raoul. Don’t blame this on me. Besides, you should be happy I was the one who walked in on you and not someone else.” 

I mumbled some kind of thanks while Erik spoke once again. “We are indeed very grateful that you’ll keep our secret as if it was your own.”

“Of course I will. He’s my brother. “ Philippe nodded at me. “And from what I’ve seen, you seem to make him happy.”

“He does.” I stepped up beside Erik and took his hand in mine. He seemed a little shocked at first but relaxed when there was no revulsion from Philippe. 

Philippe smiled. “So how long have you two…?”

“We’ve been partners ever since I arrived at the Opera, and we’ve been engaged since the days before the masquerade.”

Philippe’s jaw dropped. “You’re _engaged_? And you got engaged _before me_? Damn, I thought I won that race.”

“Oh, I won alright.” I squeezed Erik’s hand in emphasis. 

“I have a lot of questions, primarily about you Monsieur Chambon, but father is waiting for me. And I do believe you were… hrm… in the middle of something too. So let’s save the questions for another time. I wont say anything to anyone as long as you make me a promise.”

“Which is?”

“Next time, lock the door!” Philippe chuckled and shook his head while he left the room. 

I slowly turned to Erik. My libido wasn’t satisfied yet, and there was just one man capable of helping me out. “So, can we go again?”

Erik gave me an incredulous look. “Raoul!”

“Right! Sorry.” I walked over to the door Philippe had just left though and locked it. Then I turned back. “So now, can we go again?”


	49. Last names and husbands

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To all my amazing readers out there, and especially to NayteYouFool, Starlord2004 (who left me the longest comment yet! XD), chesspawn, Enderblade34, eragon19 (who's stayed with me for years now <3), Lely (who's been with me longest! <3), lover_of_blue_roses, MaidenofChains (who likes my puns!), 1_Heluva_Butler (who's also stayed with me! Since ch 37. :3), and last but not least point92five! I'm sending so much love to all of you guys! Your comments makes me so happy. :3

* * *

Erik paced back and forth in his living room. 

“I’m nervous about your brothers questions.”

“Any question in particular?” I myself was reclining on his sofa, idly sipping on a glass of wine. 

“All of them. I can’t think of a single question that I know how to answer.” He threw his hands into the air in exasperation. 

“I should hope that you know how to answer the question _Do you love my brother?_ ”

“Fine. There’s _one_ question that will have a pleasing answer. But what do I do when he asks where I come from? Where I live? How come I’m always at the Opera? What’s beneath the mask?”

I sighed, put down my wineglass and stepped into Erik’s way to stop his pacing. “Your name is George Chambon and you come from Lille. You are an esteemed composer that live at the Opera since you’re hired to compose and correct the musicians. And you were in an accident near the German border which is why you cover your face with a mask.” I leaned in and kissed his porcelain covered cheek. “And a very pretty mask if I may say so myself.”

“Thank you. I just wish…” The end of the sentence was lost in a deep sigh. 

“Wish what, love?”

“I wish I wouldn’t have to lie. I know I told you earlier that I like my alternative persona, and I do, I just wish things would be different. I wish I had something to my name. I wish I _had_ a name to tie something to.”

“Do you mean that you don’t have a last name?”

 _How come I never thought to ask him about his last name? We’d been together for the more part of a year and I hadn’t asked him about it?_

I thought back to the early days in our relationship and remembered how I relentlessly asked for his name. Then he finally gave me the name Erik and I was beyond pleased. I must have thought he’d give me his last name in time, when he was ready for it. Much like showing me the face behind the mask. The thought of seeing him completely without a mask still filled me with some apprehension. It is such a big deal for Erik, so when he finally trusts me enough to show me I have to get it right. I have to prove to him that he didn’t put his faith in me for nothing.

“No, I don’t remember.”

I was thrown out of my thoughts by Erik’s answer. _Right, we were talking about last names._

“Didn’t your mother ever tell you?”

“My mother never counted me as part of the family. She didn’t want me to use the family name.”

“But your father must have thought differently. Didn’t he say anything before he died?”

“If he did, I can’t seem to remember. Besides, you and Antoinette Giry are the only ones who have asked for my real name ever since I left my parents home all those years ago. People have last names to show off their heritage. To have a last name is to be a part of a family, and I was never a part of one, therefore I have no last name.”

Erik’s confession stung in me. I couldn’t care less about names or titles. He was my Erik, and that was all there was. But I could hear a hind of longing in is voice when he spoke about a family. 

“Then you’ll be a de Chagny.” I said matter of factly. 

Erik blinked, confused. “What do you mean?”

“You’ll have to take my last name then. I mean we are practically married.”

Erik snorted. “You can’t just hand over your last name, Raoul. It doesn’t work like that.”

“I’m not handing it over. I am sharing it. And since I am practically your husband I see no reason as to why you can’t take my last name. It is custom after all.”

Erik smiled and pulled me close. “You are truly generous beyond anything I’ve ever encountered, Raoul. But no, I will not take the name de Chagny. We have not been blessed by a priest so there is no marriage no matter how much I’d love to call you my husband.”

 _So he won’t call me his husband, eh? We’ll see for how long that’ll last._

I trailed kisses up along his neck and he moaned. My trail of kisses led me to his lips and I eagerly kissed him deep, sticking my tongue down his throat, and loving every second of it. I wasn’t the only one loving the make out session if the rising tent in Erik’s pants was any indication. I slid my hands down his back and he shivered in pleasure. My hands found their way around to his front where I efficiently unbuttoned his trousers. I grasped his member firmly in my right hand. 

Erik broke our kiss and gasped. “Raoul!”

“Yes, _husband_ , tell me what you need.” I got down onto my knees in front of him. 

“We are still not-“

The quick lick at the very top of the leaking head of his cock cut his sentence short. I looked up at him and blinked innocently. “You were saying, love?”

“Oh, you’re a bad man, Monsieur.”

“You think I’m bad now? Just you wait and see.”

I grasped his member tightly in my hand and started pumping. I slid my tongue up along the length of his cock over and over again as Erik groaned. He slid his fingers through my hair and pushed me closer to his crotch. I eagerly complied and sucked his length deep into my mouth. I went up and down along his member and enjoyed the taste of his manhood and precum. 

Erik made small thrusts with his hips in time with my sucking. The feeling of him gripping my hair and thrusting into me was turning me on big time. He was close. I could feel it. 

Before he could finish in my waiting mouth I pulled off. An orgasm deprived Erik looked down at me in disbelief. 

“Why did you stop there? I was so close. Or would you rather want my seed elsewhere?”

 _Oh how that man could get me into gear! But not today… … or at least not now._

“No, love. I want to suck you dry. But first I want to hear you say it. What am I to you?”

“Everything.”

That answer alone almost made me give in. But I somehow managed to keep my focus on the goal.

“My title, Erik. You know what I’m after. Tell me what I am and what you want me to do to you.” I gave him another slow lick up along the sensitive underside of his cock. 

Erik shook his head, smiling. “You are a very bad person, Raoul, blackmailing me this way. The phantom in me is rejoicing. Fine. I want you to take me deep in that sinful mouth of yours and suck me hard. Think you can do that, _husband of mine_?”

_Yes!_

I immediately latched onto his thick length and sucked him deep. My hands worked the part of him that I couldn’t fit into my mouth. I worked him to the very limit a second time before I pulled off.

“Say it again.” I panted. “And I want you to thrust harder into me. I can take it. And right now I can’t think of anything hotter than my husband fucking my mouth.”

Erik’s eyes were half lidded with lust. “So you like that, _husband of mine_? To be used for my pleasure? Do you like the feeling of your husbands cock going in and out of that sweet mouth of yours?” He accompanied his words with actions and I loved every second of it. He thrust a little deeper into me, and his grip on my hair tightened. 

Erik came with a groan, coating my tongue in salty cum. I swallowed it and smiled up at him. 

“Don’t feel bad about lying, dear. Compared to me it’s nothing. I just used blackmail to get myself a husband!”

**Author's Note:**

> Please tell me if you found any typos or such. And I really appreciate comments!
> 
> What did you like / didn't like/ why?


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